How can I help my child succeed in school?

Question

It is very important to me that my child be happy, healthy and successful. I see so many parents that don't focus on education. My husband and I each have masters degree, yet education was not stressed in home (I have GREAT parents..just weren't of that generation, paid for college, supported it, but weren't up on our grades and stuff).

How can I help my child succeed? What did you do to instill a work ethic (my parents did that)? How do you teach time management and the importance of school?

Also, what kinds of things can I do to prep the way for college as years go by? Any programs out there to work on at home?

In case you can't tell, my little man goes of to the big K next week....he did great in preschool!

Answer 1

What I have found is that when a child comes from a home where education is not necessarily preached but both parents are educated beyond high school they child also goes to college and/or beyond. My wife and I are in a similar situation to you. We both have MBA's, both of our families paid for our undergradaute educations but never really said if you don't get all A's, you aren 't watching TV for a month.
As your son gets older explain to him the importance of education. At some point in time he is going to be interested in expensive toys or video games and that is a good opportunity for parents to teach their children a good lesson about money. Both you and your husband worked very hard in school to get a good job and to be able to afford the toys he is asking for. Keep instilling it upon him that if he wants all these things growing up he is going to have to have a good job to afford them.
Make sure he is doing his homework. At any sign of trouble get him the help he needs ie:tutor etc... Teach him proper study skills ie: homework should be done in a quiet place not in front of the television.
Time management is something they have to learn on their own. At some point he is going to play sports, want to play with friends, watch TV, but he is still going to have homework and probably household chores. You will have to say to him until your homework and chores are done you are not going anyplace. He will learn what his priorites are and eventually how to fit everything in.
Right now let him enjoy being a kid, don't prep him for a career as a surgeon. Parents who pressure kids often get the kid who rebels and than you really have a problem. Once he hits Junior High that is when you really need to start guiding him. Right now he is too young to understand. If he is interested in planes ask him if he would like ot be a pilot someday, tell him they have to be very good at math. If he says he is interested in something tell him what is takes to do that job.

Answer 2

First - what are you doing worrying about college prep right now?? Enjoy your child's youth. It's known in my home that after high school, you go to college. There's no question of college. It's just what you do.

Time management and work ethics can come after kindergarten. They will start making your child more responsible for things as he goes thru the grades ... appropriately.

Kindergarten is as much about social development as it is about education. So do not overlook that when concentrating on "grades."

At that age - make it fun.
For example ...

My son is in second grade, and one word he could not get on spelling is "jump" (for whatever reason), so we went in the front yard and he had to "jump" like a rabbit from one end of the yard to the other. Every time he took a jump - he had to say a letter - he was jumping and yelling J-U-M-P, over and over. It took maybe 10 minutes, but he will never forget it. And asked to "study" longer. He also couldn't remember "hurry" - we would say "see how fast you can spell hurry - hurry!" And he would say it as fast as he can "h-u-r-r-y". He even challenged his friends at this game. He got 101% on his test.

In Kindergarten, when he had trouble with math - we used objects a lot. M&Ms, Legos, etc. That's always fun for kids.

Also, show how it is used in life ...
As we do homework, I explain to my son how I use these things at work and everyday life. When he's watching a movie or cartoon, and he can read something - I say "Look, isn't that neat that you could read that?" I pretend to need assistance in reading simple signs on streets, in stores, at the zoo, etc. This seems to give him a greater sense of accomplishment than schoolwork.

Studies have shown that if you read every night to your child - it actually does not increase any test scores in school. However, it does give them a good habit. I let my son see me reading books, magazines, etc. To show that it is enjoyable and part of everyday life. He also enjoys being a big brother and reading to my 9 month old.

Last & obvious - stay in touch with your child's teacher. I have had good contact with my son's teachers thru the grades. Email is wonderful. You both can address issues at your own convenience. And do not hesitate to address any problems, or ask any questions. A teacher will appreciate you wanting to help at home.

Good luck. Now you just have to figure out how not to cry on that first day of school.

Answer 3

My son is 17 and a senior in highschool. Last year he won 9th in the entire state for Physics and won a $15,000 scholarship for coming in first place in the state for Chemistry! he wants to be a neuro surgeon. Even when he was very young I always spent time with him- teaching him ABC's and counting and so on. Alot of parents leave it all up to the school and blame them when it goes wrong. BUT its really a hand in hand thing. You have to work with the school and teachers. My husband is a certified welder and Im at home but my son has seen us struggle on occasion and Ive always expressed that education is number one and still do. I hope and pray he never ever has to struggle like we have a few times. I went to award night at his highschool for sports- he is in football and basketball and the gym was packed and standing room only. I went one month later for Scholastic awards and do u know there were only like 10 parents at that? i couldnt believe it! They r there to support the sports but not the grades???? Then they wonder what went wrong? I make time to go to all his award ceremonies so I can scream whistle and hoot when his name is called. We still go out to lunch once a week for mom and son night. He knows I love him more than life itself and Ill always be there for him no matter what! Show him by example. Be involved in his school and homework. Dont wait til he gets a bad report card to talk to his teachers! Last year when i went to parent teacher conference they wanted to know why I was there- he is a straight a student so u really didnt need to come! Thats crazy! I still want to know what he is doing and all that in school!!!!! Be there for him is the best u can do. Express how important school is. When he is older you and he volunteer at a soup kitchen- my son and I did- and they see all these people with no homes and no food and it really makes them think! Your going to be a great mom I can tell already!!!!!

Answer 4

Dear,

Every parent love their children. Loving alone is not enough. Do not victimize you children if you really love them. Loving doesn't mean giving them good food and clothing.

Loving means discipline them. Loving means force them. Loving means benefit them. HOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1. Discipline is just like a steering of a car. No Steering, no car.

2. Force them. Force them to do study a home minimum for 3-4 hours a day including week end.

3. Benefit: Make them realize that you love them. Love in the way for their own good by leading them to education. They like it or not education is first in their life. Make them happy in education. You may bring tutors to your house.

By the way, work and no play, make Jack a dull boy. Give little time to play and little time for TV and Videos. Make sure their own study apart from Tuition's are 3-4 hours a day.

Answer 5

Ease up and let him enjoy it. Liking school is the key to a lot of what it takes to do well. Try not to care more than he does. I find myself sometimes in the position of caring about what they're doing more than they care and then the impetus ends up coming from me and that's not good. Let him lead in what he wants to do for fun. Let him choose what he wants to read. Let him choose what he wants to do for projects and for classroom activities. Ask him if he has any questions or comments for the teacher when it's conference time. Read to him. Even once he knows how to read to himself, continue to read to him. You can read books to him that he is not capable of reading to himself. Read to him what he wants you to read. Make it fun and pleasant. Let him see that you read for pleasure too. Limit tv and computer and screen time. The less the better. Enjoy him and embrace him for his talents and his spirit and his abilities. Don't expect him to be successful in everything and make sure he knows that it's ok to make mistakes and to come to you with all his doubts and fears and questins. Start this today. Give him a big hug and send him off and go relax with a cup of coffee!!

Answer 6

You make sure they do their homework and pay attention in class. You reward them when they do well and don't worry about it when they don't, unless they obviously slack off. You can talk to them about what they learned at school, what classes and teachers they have, what they did with their friends etc. Explain their homework to them. If your five yr old doesn't understand subtraction with an abacus or fingers then get out the lollies and explain with those. Make learning fun. If your child can't remember the order of the planets then make up a silly rhyme about it. There is always a different way to explain things. You should be working with the school and teachers together to provide the best education for your child. Your child won't be brilliant at everything and that's ok. Encourage them in their weaknesses but focus and develop their strengths and passions. It's important to have a good relationship with your children in general. As long as that is there then I think the rest just follows naturally.

Answer 7

Just be there for him. Stay involved in his education, go to the school's open house and
demonstrate that education is important. When he sees that you care about his education then he will
too.

Answer 8

once he gets the element of homework support kim and start him study habits, also in the summer theres a local thing usually if you have a community college and you enroll in classes for him there fun for kids.

Answer 9

stay in contact with his teachers, get every homework assignment and make sure it gets done, spend time with him going over it. keep talking with him and keep alert for signs of bullying, etc. encourage him to particpate in school activities. good luck and peace!

Answer 10

Haven't you decided on a career for your little man yet? If he's going to kindergarten next week he REALLY should have a life plan, don't you think?