It's been 4 years since she dumped me. I was devastated. In my final contact with her, i told her if she ever needed me, i would be there for her. Out of the blue, she has emailed me saying she needs me & if i am still there for her. She has been telling me all the details about her current bf who she says treats her like crap & that she needs help/advise to get out of the relationship. I am trying to be helpful & supportive by telling her what a jerk this guy is & how she deserves better. She is very depressed & confused about the whole thing & is having a hard time figuring out if she is doing the right thing by leaving him. To make things worse, I recently found out that she has told people about our relationship.That I was abusive to her, that she left me 10 times during the 5 years we lived together & was never in love with me, it was purely lust. When she left me for the last time, I came home one day & she & her belongings were just gone, without a word to me.What should i do?
2007-08-28 02:32:18 · 18 answers · asked by jackmowack 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think you already know the answer, however, you were the only person in love at the time and you're looking to get back to that feeling. If the way she treated you is true, you shouldn't sell yourself short and experience pain again with someone who didn't appreciate you in the first place. Apparently, she's only coming back to you because she recognizes she's lost a good thing. Maybe she's using this other relationship to feel you out for any type of jealousy just so she can get her good thing back. Now, if you choose to go back just remember this: Going back to a bad relationship is like putting spoiled milk in the fridge and thinking it will be good tomorrow!! Ponder that and make your decision!! Good luck!
2007-08-28 02:40:49 · answer #1 · answered by havanablu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-05-08 07:52:26 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At this point you deserve better. She's the one who left you, but for what reasons? Ex's are called that for a reason leave it be like that. Although you might want her back because there is still love along the way. If you choose to take that route go with being friends building a hedge around the relationship so you can have a foundation and something to fall back on. You never know what will come up. Hope things work out!
2007-08-28 03:03:50 · answer #3 · answered by myrawil@sbcglobal.net 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its been a long while since you have had anything with this person and it is good that it was left on a "if you need me I'm here" term. i think that you are doing the right thing. just to be there and supportive but i don't think you should take her back. I think she may think of you as a rebound guy like that guy that we all know we can talk to and he will make things better i don't want to hurt your feelings in saying this though. but she has just experienced a bad relationship and needs a bit of comfort so just be that don't think anything seriously about it unless you really do love her and can forgive her for saying stuff like that to people about you if it weren't true, although maybe it is and you should say to her not to do so because you don't like it.
i don't know if this Will be any help but i hope so..
2007-08-28 02:44:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she doesn't understand what she needs and whom she wants be with. She's trying to find a better guy, but doesn't understand she hurts all those men trying to be with her. She thought you wasn't good enough for her and now she is not satisfied with the new boyfriend. I guess she is trying to be happy, but you'll never make her happier than she fells inside. Stay friends, if you can be a friend to her, maybe someday she'll understand you're the best... But does she worth it? I wish you patience and wisdom.
2007-08-28 02:44:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she's sat there and said you were abusive, she's a fruit. Leave. And the fact that she's now having problems with her relationship... she's just running back to you because she feels safe... She's going to up and leave if you take her back, because she'll go out trying to find something better. Don't get involved... She sounds like trouble.
2007-08-28 02:39:27 · answer #6 · answered by Glitters15 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is an ex for a reason. Leave it that way. If she is telling people things about your relationship (true or false) then she is looking for attention. Go ahead and help her with her current problems, but don't take her back.
2007-08-28 02:39:08 · answer #7 · answered by screaming inside 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would tell her you can't help her. It sounds like this woman has alot of baggage and needs some professional help. Also, why was she telling people about your relationship? Was what she told them true or a lie? If it was a lie you definetly don't want her in your life because if she did it once she will do it again.
2007-08-28 02:40:21 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you said you'd be there. But she certainly thinks little of you. She must have few friends and you were the final one to call. Be nice but tell her you've done all you can and wish her well. Chances are the guy DOESN'T treat her bad (did you? but she's says you did)
You really need to stay clear.
2007-08-28 02:39:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
tell her she needs to get out of that relationship...after that. delete all contact with her. She sounds like a succubus (an evil creature that sucks the life out of men). She hurt you once, she wont think twice to do it again. Watch you back with her around, dont let your guard down or she will cut out your heart and eat your soul!
2007-08-28 02:38:53 · answer #10 · answered by Cutthroat Lars 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋