Confession?

Question

Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside. He looked up and said weakly, "I have something I must confess." "There's no need to," his wife replied. "No," he insisted, "I want to die in peace. I slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!" "I know, I know," she replied. "Now just rest and let the poison work."

fizzywo, I have just checked and No I am not a she, maybe she steals them from my joke box!

Answer 1

LOL.....yeh right

Dolly Parton and Prince Charles die on the same day and arrive at
Heaven's gate at the same time. They are greeted by an angel at the gate
and all three of them start to have a casual conversation. Eventually,
the angel asks them, "Why do you think you should get into Heaven?"

Dolly Parton opens her blouse and says," Are you kidding, these are the
greatest things God has ever created."

The angel then turns to Prince Charles and asks, "Well, what about you?"

Prince Charles replies, " Give me a glass of chardonnay and I'll show
you." The angel honors his request and then Prince Charles takes a sip of
the wine, walks over to a toilet that's by the gate, gurgles it around a
bit, and then spits into the toilet and flushes it.

The angel replies, "Well, I can see you're DEFINITELY getting into
Heaven."

Dolly is outraged and yells, "WHAT, all he did was spit in a toilet and
then flush it. How does that earn him a place in Heaven?!"

The angel replies, "Because a royal flush always beats a pair no matter
how big it gets!"

CHeeRioS

Answer 2

Neglect what Jake said and come to word "confession"-with an interrogation mark..What is it? Once we know it then we can talk as intelligent beings off scriptings of stories in our mental . Do you get me?To know it we have to go questions and find relevant answers. All this may appear childish but knowledge is it not at depth? Try these - why people confess?To whom they do so? What are the gains of both parties?Do not say there are no gains to any. Now what the receiver does with the information received ( from the one confessing)?Does he remain silent and keep it for himself ?In some religions it is a golden rule to confess ( if not -it is long established- you go directly to Hell!).The "confessor" once vomit s all feels relieved- this has a psycho effect on his health- no doubt . Add other questions for further answers.( Journal keepers never confess to any being -human- but vomit all in their book and seek answers thus working their brains at empowerment! And religions do not like that - why? It is very complicated to put all this information without violating the rules of your community.Re read all and get the message for your self-I give it as it comes!
There is an old story of a king called Midas who went to the sea side, often dug a hole and talked out all - worries -he
had-careful not letting any hear what he said.Then he covered the hole and went away.It is said he never confessed to any in his life and lived long. Now think why he behaved like that?He could well have gone to a priest or called one into his palace.
There are others who confess in other ways- say directly talking to their Gods - crying all the way the touching the feet of the divinity ( statue) and passing his had on his head or the suffering subject .Or just relating in his heart his worries or miseries or curses against whomsoever they may have targeted as accused etc. etc
Now come to the story -assume it is true.How the wife knew all Jake said?And perhaps who recommended poison?Not easy questions-careful.If you get the right answer please keep it for you and do not advertise in public - it may cause hardships or harm to sensible chaps.It's my principle in life to say "never blame any but know the truth at its purity "-if knowledge is not pure truth what is it then?
Difficult to get me?

Answer 3

a million - i admire donning adult men's Tank tops..XL..the ladies ones are too tight 2- i communicate over with myself 3- i playPokemon video games at age 39 4 - i i admire gazing Spanish cleansing soap operas not understanding what they are asserting 5 - i do unlike vegetables yet purely toddler carrots & corn 6- i stay to tell the tale Yahoo solutions till 5;.00am each and every so often

Answer 4

Gotta love a woman who knows how to get the ultimate revenge.

Answer 5

Elric I have a friend called Beverley who sends me all of these jokes before you post them here. Are you she?

Answer 6

!!!Ho ELric i realy don't know how can i tell this is a true story, some people had done things like this in real life and during the years they lived in constant fare. of getting caugh. in cases like this the wome'n knew and just can of plat it of pretending thay they knew any thing just to take revenge after and some time they choice to harm or cause death to their love one for putting them to al kind of pain and humilation. peace out. rosalinda.

Answer 7

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.No one is angrier than a woman who has been rejected in love.

Answer 8

Cool!

Answer 9

Ha!
Though you've got to admit, men would do that if their wives let them.

Answer 10

Very funny indeed!!xx