please help me to answer this question..we have a debate 2morow and i want to gathered all of your opinion for we to have a great article...please make your answer as long as you can...thank you!!!!
2007-08-28 01:50:39 · 24 answers · asked by jvictor 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
My husband and I waited until our wedding night to have sex. It made the relationship stronger, because it wasn't based on lust or sex, but on feelings and we had a better understanding of each other. When you take sex out of the way it leaves room for more. To put it bluntly. . .the guy knew he wasn't getting anything at the end of our dates, so when he was sweet, kind and went out of his way to do nice things for me, I knew it was for me and not for sex.
As for what others are saying about finding out you don't enjoy sex with your partner after you're married, well you have the rest of your lives to perfect it. In an open and honest marriage you tell each other what you like in bed and what you don't like giving each other what they are looking for in the bedroom
2007-08-28 01:57:52 · answer #1 · answered by Billie A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't really say that it is. I mean there are some couples out there that wait because one or the other of the partners are celibate. But for some I think they feel that if they have sex that will make them closer and that it will make for a more permanent relationship. But no it doesn't work that way. For sex only makes things seem more important for the woman. For the guy that hasn't really declared any commitment or relationship status it was still sex for him and he can continue on looking for other partners. So this is why women always get hurt so easily, because they thought the sex was special but it wasn't for the guy. Not unless he has feelings for her. So to be honest there is no real perk to having premarital sex on the emotional level. But I guess on the physical level for myself, I would just like to experiment with someone I can trust if I were to have pre-marital sex in a relationship. I'm not really into testing people out or anything. I don't see anyone like a car so that would never be my defense. I'm just a hyper-curious virgin that is interested in a few things. :) Regardless though, I would much rather have a stronger commitment and a supportive partner before even thinking about sex. Because as fast as babies are made today I wouldn't want to risk that or any dieases, just for getting my jollies off.
P.S. I'm sure you will get many colorful responses to your question. Good luck on your debate and article too.
2007-08-28 02:13:05 · answer #2 · answered by Cursed_Romantic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not married sex is far more likely to ruin a relationship. Sex binds you to the other person There is a chemical that makes you feel comfortable with the other person but it only last for a limited time. If you are not right for each other no matter how much sex you have it will not save the relationship.
It is best to have a commitment with your partner so you know that you love each other and wont break up. It takes at least a year to truly know that you love each other. If you love someone you would find it hard to even imagine cheating on them.
2007-08-28 02:03:07 · answer #3 · answered by wisemancumth 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sexuality is a vital part of any relationship. Along with finances and children, sexuality is one of the biggest causes of strain in marriages. The reason is because it becomes more than just a physical act. Both partners tie all kinds of emotional things to sex - such as caring, consideration, attraction, love, etc. And when the sexual relationship becomes dysfunctional, it can make you question your partner's feelings toward you and your own self image.
As for premarital sex, that is a personal decision. Everyone had to decide for themselves when is the right time to have sex. That being said, I have a very difficult time with the idea of marrying someone I have never had sex with. Mainly because marriage is supposed to be a lifetime commitment and I would be horrified to get married and then find out I wasn't sexual compatible with my partner.
2007-08-28 02:02:23 · answer #4 · answered by Justin H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex is important in a relationship but not because of the act itself. Most people look at sex as a bonding between two people. This is most intimate thing that you can share with another person and as close as you can possibly get.
For premarital sex I don't have a strong view that premarital sex is wrong. Promiscuity is wrong. Being with one partner and being committed to that person does not make premarital sex wrong in my view. It is a good way to know that this is the person that you want to be with. It is something I think that you should know about the other person going in to a marriage. I think that you should always be open and honest with the person that you are with and if you are planning to marry then you should share all aspects about you with your potential spouse before you are married.
But there are so many ways to perceive what the definition of sex is (Thanks to Bill, but Love him anyway). In order to be close to someone you don't have to have intercourse. You can still be close without it. So it all depends on the couples own needs and desires but I do think that some form of closeness is necessary to have a healthy relationship.
2007-08-28 02:00:23 · answer #5 · answered by katbonikowski 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it ok to have premarital sex?" That is a common question among teens and engaged couples. Perhaps you are in a relationship that is progressing in that direction, but you're not sure what to do. In your mind, you are probably weighing the pros and cons of premarital sex. On the positive side of the scale, there is acceptance from your peers, hope for pleasure, and the fulfillment of sexual desires. The negative side of the scale carries the weights of morals, fear of pregnancy or disease, and guilt. How do these scales balance? What is the right decision? Let's take a look at some of the facts.
2007-08-28 01:55:46 · answer #6 · answered by me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that young ladies are taught to be pure when they get married but I'm not so sure that is fair. I realize that religion promotes abstinence and that helps prevent unwanted pregnancies but it might be better to promote knowledge. To go into a permanent relationship without knowledge is foolish. It seems women are taught that they must indure what life hands out to them. I fought hard for the sexual revolution of the 60's because I didn't want to be the Beaver's mother. I didn't want to run the perfect household and be the perfect wife. I wanted a partner and I wanted to know just what I was getting into. To be married to someone that is sexually inadequate would be a lifetime of horror. Women deserve to know the person they are marrying and I think that sex is a large part of marriage. You can have all the premarriage counseling you want and ask all the questions you want of your partner to be but what if you're not compatible in bed. I don't promote sleeping with every man that comes around but sleeping with a man you are going to marry is smart. It doesn't make you a woman of loose morals, it just helps you to know the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with. I liked the story about the Scottish couple that were hand fast for a year. After a year, you had a choice about whether you really wanted to marry forever or not. You really got to know your partner before you decided to committ forever. Women's lot in life has changed drastically in the last several decades and sexual freedom is part of it. Women deserve to be fully functioning adults and their choices should be their own, not dictated by anyone else. I am so glad to have been born in the USA and be free. I read on Yahoo this evening about a Hindu man who complained his wife did not obey him. I guess they would stone her to death for having sex outside of marriage. And yet the men are free to populate the earth as they can. The double standard needs to be over and women need to be free to do as they see fit.
2007-08-28 02:15:57 · answer #7 · answered by towanda 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of couples don't even know that they want to be together until after they've had sex.` The taboo and stigma that used to be associated with premarital sex went out with the fifties. Nowadays, you're not even considered cool unless you ARE having sex, and your peers won't hesitate to let you know. Especially if you're a guy (and the double standard is all guys want their girl to be virginal, never mind the babe they slept with the other night). The affirmative side of sex---it can be really fun if you know what you're doing and it's what you, not your friends, want to do. And only when you're ready.!
askaman
2007-08-28 02:03:13 · answer #8 · answered by www.askaman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Premarital sex is a personal option. You wouldn't buy a car without test driving it, so why marry someone that is so bad in bed that your sex life suffers and you end up in divorce? Sex does play a big role in marriage, there's no denying it. Why else would some people opt to be virgins?
To be physically attracted to someone is great, but if visualizing having sex with them turns you off because they are so awful, you WILL go look somewhere else and your marriage will end in divorce.
2007-08-28 02:11:14 · answer #9 · answered by Stacie A 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex is an important and intricate part of marriage and for a couple to get married and then find that they are sexually incompatible is to put a sever strain on the marriage. They need to know before they get married.
When two married couples have sex then that is good.
2007-08-28 01:56:12 · answer #10 · answered by Kidakatherine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋