men and women out there, help. i'm wondering why is he still single?

Question

i happen to know a man, he's handsome, he's rich, he's tall, he's nice and very caring, he's also an athlete, has a great sense of humor, and is very charming. i'm very sure he's not gay. then, why is he still single? he's 39. i'm 26.
Additional Details:
he likes me and we've been going out for 4 months now. i think i'm attracted to him, and i enjoy his company a lot. but i am thinking and wondering why is he still single when in fact he can make any woman fall for him?
i heard from friends, his ex girlfriends always leave him- 10 years ago, 1st ex girlfriend, ended up with his best friend. next ex girlfriend, migrated to another country-so they're long dstance,when he followed,he found out she already have a bf.his last gf cheated on him after 2 years into the relationship. this happened 6 years ago.many wmen firts w/him but he ignores them. then we met and he started dating me.i'm thinking why these women chose to leave him?when in fact,i found a great guy in him.enlighten me pls

Answer 1

The typical female response would be to say, "Oh he seems too perfect, there has to be a flaw somewhere!" And I am sure there is a flaw or two somewhere, but who doesn't have one? I personally would stop living in his past. It is good to take note of his past but try not to let it bother you. I am sure they had their reasons. As with any relationship, open communication is key, so if this is bothering you.. why not try talking to him about it? With each and every relationship people learn and grow. Who knows maybe there is something wrong with him, but how are you ever going to know unless you go for it. Never live life always stressing on the "what if's".. you will miss out on so much hun. And so what if he doesn't turn out to be your Mr. Perfect. You will have gained insight and become a stronger person. Just follow your gut. If after 4 months of dating him you feel he is the one for you then by all means sweety go for it. Just stay calm, talk to him and enjoy the ride. :)

Answer 2

From what you have said I would put my money on two things. First, he makes bad choices in women and is drawn to women who will cheat on him or leave him. If you are not the cheating type then it is a good sign because he may have recognized his bad choices and is now seeking to make a better choice. Like women men are not always attracted to women with good character.

The second possibility is that he sabotages his relationships on purpose. If that is the case, then no one here except maybe a professional can help you. I would suggest that if he is OK with it, and you have access to any of his Ex girlfriends you ask them why they left him. The story repeats itself too many times, there has to be a reason and it's probably the same one.

One other reason occurred to me and that is that he might really be a nice guy. Many women really don't want nice guys, they would rather have someone with a rough edge to them. This goes back to his choices in women, choosing one who wants men with a rough edge.

either way you should get an answer to your question before you become to invested in this relationship.

Answer 3

One persons garbage is another persons treasure. I know a lot of women who don't like "nice" guys. Date him some more if you are attracted to him. Get to know his habits. He may have some habits that other women couldn't handle. Maybe he is waiting for the right person, maybe he is looking for someone who will treat him nice too. Give it a chance - if it doesn't work out, at least you will have had a nice time, and hopefully, learned something from the relationship.
I wondered what was wrong with my husband when we were dating too (he had been divorced twice). Both wives cheated on him. I got to know him, we fell in love, and have been married for over 16 years now. The point I'm trying to make, is that it doesn't necessarily have to be a problem with him - give it a chance. Good Luck!

Answer 4

Why are you so determined that something needs to be wrong with him? These other women were not you and so maybe he's great and they're great, but they weren't great together. Or, maybe when the novelty of the relationship wears off for him, he won't be putting himself into it the way he has thus far and things will go downhill. Who knows? He may have some big flaws that will show over time or he may not. There's honestly no way to ever truly understand the dynamics of a relationship unless you're one of the people in it so looking at his past relationships isn't really going to help you.

Instead of focusing on his past relationships, why not focus on making this present relationship with him good? Build your friendship with him and create a strong foundation of trust, respect, etc. I mean, taking your logic, why are you single? What's wrong with you? Wouldn't you prefer that he just be happy that he's got you now and those other guys were dumb enough to lose you? Don't ignore obvious red flags, but problems will always be there, so don't go making them for yourself!

Good luck and I hope it works out!

Answer 5

Well like they say, Its a reason for everything...I can look into your question. First of all he probaly tired of the games in the woman he been with prior to you.It dont excites him when women flirts because he been there he use to the attention.For one of his X girls to sleep with friend, He probaly takeing it real slow on his next woman he choose,and he saw something in you different obviously cause you all been kickin it for 4mths,thats a start of interest.Hes 39, and is attractive,but maybe the type dont want to play the baseball field with these women.You may be the lucky one girl, for what you sayin.You found a great guy in him because its something that pull a spark, and in time it will tell what spark blew....Good Luck

Answer 6

I can tell you this from experience, I know what he is thinking because I'm there right now, sometime after having love always end up in deception, a person needs to just focus on other things because once you give your heart to someone and they break it, and it happens over and over and over again, it really hurts and takes allot out of you. Then comes the time where you have to make a conscious decision.....love doesn't work for me so I will just leave it alone for a while. from the text in your question I can relate to him allot, because I am going through the same thing that he is, but its the saga of life, why it has to be so hard, I don't know but, in the end we will see someday. Just give him time, he needs that to ultimately trust you enough to actually open up more to you.

Answer 7

He must have a bad breath or body odor? Joke only.
Well, you are with him more than i do, so you should have made some observation. Did you find him stingy? Is he gentleman towards you? Is he romantic in a way he thinks about other first before himself? Is he extravagant? Or is he boring? Is he a brag? Does he let other people talk or is he the talker all the time? How smart is he compare to you? Does he follow through on what he said? There, I gave a lot of clues on how to observe next time you meet him. Add yours to mine, then solve your puzzle. ok? good luck.

Answer 8

Mr. Wonderful at 39? He's married. Its just not possible for a man not to be involved in something at that age, so he is either gay or married, maybe divorced. So if he's not gay, thats the other option. Sorry love, maybe confront him about. Sadly, when its too good to be true, it probably is. If he really truly isnt married there's something wrong with him, he could be cruel to his women or maybe have something else really weird about him. Hope it all works out well

Answer 9

You can ask him. He may feel flattered/ He may have had an E-wife killed or a fiance that her lost tragically and he is protecting himself from repeat of he same. Or he may be just to picky, If you have only been going with him for 4 months give it some more time. You may found out. Also some guys check your background, If you have a less than perfect life as many women have they may not fit into his mold.

Answer 10

It could be that he doesn't want to have children. Many men are fearful of the responsibilities of parenthood. I had to be talked into it. But this is very important to women; it's a major part of their sexual drive. I broke up with women and they broke up with me because I didn't want to have another child after I was widowed. But if that's the problem and you're sure that you don't want children, it could work. Or, he could be at the point where starting a family could start being agreeable to him. At four months, it's time to have a talk with him about where each of you wants to be in another couple of years.