How do you know which 'level' they are??
I KNOW my neighbor stalks me, can't even go outside w/out him creeeping around the corner
is it possible just to be nice, but always occupied then they will eventually vanish?
geez. I don't know what to do.
don't have my privacy anymore since last spring :-(
wished he'd leave me alone tho
2007-08-27 15:26:17 · 13 answers · asked by deirdrefaith 4 in Politics & Government ➔ Law Enforcement & Police
Everytime I'm out gardening, he ZOOMS around the corner to talk to me on my SIDE of the fence
Even when I have company he does that too.
He looks at me through the window from his kitchen
and takes photo's of my garden
and today when I was outside he zoomed around the corner again like he always does and delivered me an envelope of pix he took of my garden
and his wife can't stand me
it's becoming awkard
my husband has noticed his behavior but doesn't know what to make of it
[we've never had to deal w/it b4]
:-(
2007-08-27 15:55:45 · update #1
He may be 'nice' and 'nonthreatening' now but who's to say he won't get bolder next week or next month. Call the police and have them talk to him about his conduct before they have to haul you off to the morgue.
2007-08-27 15:41:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are no levels. When one has a potential problem in dealing with it assume the worst and work up fom there. 9 times out of 10 if one has enough info in the back of ones head and something does not feel right.... it is not right. If a person feels uncomfortable regardless of the others intention you still should not have to feel that way...... and you said YOU KNOW. So get it finished and attack the issue.
Yes there is the possibility that he is just trying to be friendly and admires your garden. But this does sound super odd as his wife does not like you says much. THEY as a couple have issues so that is where you start. The police would not be much help based upon your details.
OK if the situation was right your husband could go over and say he (politely) has been told you have concerns. Implied threat but nice. But the guy will have every excuse in the world and actually try to make your husband feel like he made a mistake. So leave that for later. But a good up front "do not speak to my wife... period" can do the job.
You could simply have the police there when you or he says this and nothing needs to be happening. And ask for a police report. His wife will most likely give him crap.
Even if the wife hates you or seems uncomfortable she is probably aware somewhat of his behavior. Odds are she is unsure of what is really going on so she is cold to you. The guy is saying all sorts of things. So best to get to the heart of the matter woman to woman. I bet when you talk he will have much bigger issues.
Regardless if you start making a deal about it you will be able to take further steps. Don't be shy.
2007-08-28 07:27:37 · answer #2 · answered by jackson 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know that there are "levels" of stalkers! But I do know this, you cannot be nice to him to make him vanish. It will just encourage him to continue his behavior. Tell him directly and in no uncertain terms that you do not welcome his attention and that it is making you uncomfortable. I would make sure that your husband is with you when you do this. Also make sure he understands when you do this that you will take further (legal) steps if he does not stop stalking you. I would use this word in his presence so that he hears it and understands that you feel he is stalking you. This behavior is abnormal and you must convey to him that you are tired of it and that you will do whatever is necessary to stop it, up to and including calling the police and asking that a restraining order be issued.
I don't care how harmless this guy acts, I have heard of these things going on for years and years! Is that what you want? You can be direct without being rude at this point but it may come to the point where that's the only thing he understands. Tell him to leave you alone!! What about his wife? Where is she while all of this is going on? Better yet, where is your husband?
2007-08-27 17:01:28 · answer #3 · answered by pucci 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey not almost all ALL stalkers are dangerous. If they were stable minded they wouldn't be stalking. Anyways based on what you wrote I would say you have a few options. 1. Tell your husband to grow some balls and tell the guy to cool it. Nothing wrong with that and it usually works wonders...but then again I haven't been nutered by liberals. 2. Make a report with the police...generally speaking a 'restraining order' is used between people who a. are or were in a significant relationship b. are or were living together c. family members
Once #2. is compleated I am sure that there are pleanty of tresspass laws that can be used to effect an arrest and an end to his stalking. Hopefully a brief conversation between your husband and the stalker will suffice...
2007-08-27 17:27:46 · answer #4 · answered by Bazzo76 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay what do you mean by stalking you? Does he follow you around to work, school, shopping etc., call you on the phone all the time, leave you gifts or is he just sitting in his yard when you come outside. Maybe he attempts to have a conversation with you. Your definition of stalking may be different from actual stalking. Have you ever told this person to leave you alone. If he truly is stalking you, then yes he could be dangerous. Depending on what it is that he is doing, you need to decide if it needs to be reported to the police. If you don't have the courage to tell him to leave you alone, the police will tell him for you. Ask the officers about personal protection orders and how to obtain them in your state.
2007-08-27 15:45:25 · answer #5 · answered by chill out 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stalkers are bad news. Don't be nice and try to talk to him without having someone else there wtih you.
If you're too nice, it may make him want to stalk you even more. It may be better to not bother with him at all if it creeps you out.
2007-08-27 15:35:34 · answer #6 · answered by gc27858 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yea i think so they are all dangerous you should call the police and file a restraining order against them if someone is stalking you.
2007-08-27 15:32:00 · answer #7 · answered by thelongestday41 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They all have the potential, but few people get attacked by them. Play it safe; take it seriously and contact the police.
2007-08-27 15:32:18 · answer #8 · answered by Citicop 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My 'stalker' called me over 120 times a day, combined with 100+ text messages and emails daily, unwanted gifts...etc........A ONE LINE SUMMARY of each message or email takes up over SEVENTY PAGES.....
If the neighbor comes outside when you are outside, it is a nuisance. If he is not following you around town, calling, emailing, text messaging, leaving you gifts.....he isn't a stalker.
2007-08-27 15:32:29 · answer #9 · answered by Marlon M 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, there is the potential that they can flip out at any time and do something crazy.
2007-08-28 00:46:44 · answer #10 · answered by WC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋