What's wrong with me?

Question

I think i'm depressed but i'm not sure. When i was in 2nd and 3rd grade my parents got into a huge fight and i mean physical. like my dad punched my mom, my mom threw a glass at my dad and my dad threw it back. There was a lot of yelling and screaming. When that happened i felt it was my job to take care of my younger brother in 1st grade and my 2 year old brother this big fight lasted a few years into 4th or the begining of 5th grade. my parents stopped fighting started counseling and my dad went to AA for his alchol problems. Although my parents apoligized i don't think i ever forgave them for those years i remember i had drifted away from my friends and tried to always protect my little siblings either by telling them it was going to be ok or acting like the adult when my parents were being kids. I was told never to tell anyone and i think that that has effected me too. Another thing i tried to do when i was little was make things better with my parents they always seemed to make me

feel like it was my duty to make things better and i tried. Now that i'm older in 8th grade i have two new siblings 4 and 6 and my dad started drinking again when i was in 7th grade. ever since then i feel that i haven't been the same. he'd say nasty things to my brother and i like go to hell or fuc* you, i wish i never had kids or something else. for almost the past half year i have been crying myself to sleep. my mom now that she's been going to alnon has become a diffrerent person and i feel like she never fights back. my mom and dad almost got a separation earlier this year but they got better and all of a sudden its gotten worse. my dad's been working very late sometimes we won't even see him for a couple of day's then whenever he is home everyone will be excited and he'll be drunk and on the computer. last night he said go to hell to me and told me he meant it. the school year has started and i don't want to cry myself to sleep anymore. i don't want my parents to get a divorce

for fear of my siblings being without a dad but i tihnk i'm starting to regret always looking out for my younger siblings. My dad's dad commited suicide when my dad was 13 and my dad always said how it made him grow up faster and how he never had a chance to be a kid but i feel like him and my mom have robbed me of my childhood and i don't want to have like an adult the rest of my teen years! i'm only 13! please help. i'm afraid to tell my friends and as far as teachers i don't really trust them. at school and around other people i act happy but lately its been really hard to hide and now i tinhk i know how it feels to have your heart ache.

please help me and not make fun of me. yes i have tried talking to my parents but my dad is a drucken *** and i've noticed my mom is kinda going through the same thing so i don't want to bother her more. please help. i really just want to be happy.

Answer 1

Your Mother needs to divorce him for her children's sake. She is attending Ala-Non, but are you attending Ala Teen?
There are groups out there that will help you with all that you have/are going through.
Your Dad has started drinking again. It is time for the ultimate wake up call. You all need to dial 911 when hes is drunk and offensive and have him put out of the home.
He will either come around or die a drunk.
Sorry to sound so hard, but I have had my share of alcoholic friends.

Answer 2

I'm sorry to hear about all the troubles you've gone through. If it helps at all, you are not alone. I know EXACTLY how it feels to be in the middle of it all, but only wish to have a "happy family". I didnt want to give up on my parents and myself and I did'nt. It took time but things got better over time. Im 16 now and the older I've become, the more I've understood how important it is to never lose yourself or forget who you are because things always seem to get worse and if you succumb to all the negativeness and stop caring for happiness and if you stop wishing to be close with anyone, you will cause yourself even greater pain. We ignore our family and we push away our friends, but doing this never solves the problem, it only drags it out further. There is no feeling worse, than the feeling that you are all alone. Even if we have to act like the adult sometimes and be stronger than they are (parents), you are doing the right thing. Life may seem like it sucks real bad, probably cuz it does, BUT don't forget that there is a tomorrow and I can promise you that those who suffer who don't deserve to suffer at an early age will be rewarded in the future, just don't give up. seriously. I hope this helped and hope everything works out.
Ps- I dont think anything is wrong with you at all, you are just reacting to a negative situation and thats normal. Good luck

Answer 3

Maybe the best thing would be for your parents to separate. It might straighten your dad up a little too see what his actions are causing him to miss out on. It would be better for all of you kids in the long run. It is better to not see a dad than to see a drunk , mean , awful dad. It would probably help your moms self esteem more also, when she finds out that she can do it without him and the she really is a strong mom that is doing the best she can for her family. It is o.k. to still love him and not let him in the house to treat you all that way. You have to love yourself more and know that you and your entire family deserve so much better from him. Good luck I feel for you

Answer 4

This has happend to me to but it was my mom who was drunk all the time. and i was only 2, actually not even, now my parents are divorced and everything is better i have a step mom and a step sister along with a new step dad and half brother. i also have a brother and a sister, so 4 siblings. and my life is still a little hard when my mom and step dad fight but it always turns out ok. my mom stopped her drinking a long time ago and im the same age as you. you will be happier if they divorce trust me.

Answer 5

an particularly ill mama canines is an particularly demanding concern. and that i understand your anger at particularly some the solutions which you gained. it is common so which you would be able to wish to vent returned to those individuals a number of your anger and frustration. So, attempt to proceed to be calm and shop your concentration on your canines & puppies. do no longer enable this cloud your real purpose - a healthy canines. And specific, i could want to understand this consequence. Kudos to you to your rapid action in looking after 7 puppies! it is not common! I choose that extra people could understand that there are situations that stump even the best of vets. on a similar time as the calicum situation is the main complication-loose with those indicators, it isn't the only reason. And your dedication to this canines and her puppies is amazingly, very admirable. So, you already know which you're responding to this disaster interior the way attainable. you're doing all you're able to do in an particularly confusing concern. enable God handle something. Peace

Answer 6

I've been seeing allot of you on The Christmas section answering stuff like to do with the perfect Christmas and being with family is allot of the things that you say, I do it to - your the same age as me and my life with family hasn't really been that great, sometimes its been kinda hard living with my mum rowing with my dad (which are now divorced) and now, quite allot I have trouble with my step dad who also likes to drink. Unlike you I have never had to look after siblings, it was just always me, but having to share my mums problems about money, family etc (as she had no one else to turn to when things got bad) it made me grow up allot faster and become more mature about adult situations. I know how you feel and it must be so difficult to see a family that is slowly breaking away, it happened to me (when I was around 6/7). There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, if anything I think it was really brave for to even say those things on the net. Not all people can really put allot of info in a question like that. Its sad and its not something kids like us should really deal with at 13 but allot of us do - To be fair, I think it makes us a better person, more mature and wise with growing up...I do hope it all works out. And I hope you get that Christmas with your family that you explained so great in one question - "what makes Christmas authentic?" It really sounded great.

P.S I was two answers above you with that =)

Answer 7

Your family is going through some rough patches and your father clearly can't handle stress. Your mom is there to help him through and as the eldest you are going to have to look after your brothers and sisters. Don't ever blame yourself for this mess. Your parents started this mess before you were born and they will have to work things out. Unfortunately these things take time and you are directly affected, as are your brothers and sisters. All I can say is have patience, and if you need to speak to someone, you may want to talk to your counselor or a licensed therapist at school or your local priest.

Answer 8

Cpnvince your mom to divorce him. Its not healthy for anyone even your dad. You should move far away even if it means leaving your friends. this is abuse and you should really try getting you and your family away from your dad, if you want to be a teenager again. I know it might be hard for your mom to be a single mom but it wil be so much more better and peacful. There is always the option if your mom does not want to leave him or says she needs his money to take care of you than get you and your siblings out of thier ASAP. as soon as possibl this is not a healthy enviroment. Live with a relative who is willing to take you in just get the hell out of there!

Answer 9

It is obvious that your mother is aware of the problem first off. Otherwise she would have already taken action. Second, I commend you for looking out for your siblings but now its time to do something about it. You have to find someone to confide in. (Not an online person) I will be totally honest if you talk to the school counselors etc. child protective services will show up at the door but you know getting them out of the house is the best thing you could do for all of you...... Hard to hear but true. Now if you so not want to talk to someone at the school how about a friends parents? preacher? relative? Verbal abuse often turns physical and you do not want this happening to you or your sisters-brothers....... Putting you in my prayers

Answer 10

Its perfectly normal for you to feel like you have to take care of ur siblings they are very lucky to have you. the thing is that u should have to, ur parents never should have done what they did. and u have the rite to be mad, but sometimes you have to let go so that u can move on. when you forgive ur parents for what they did you will feel better. as for not telling anyone thats ur call. you have that choice. and u need to kno that asking for help is ok. that if its something that u cant handle u can get help. and sometimes its what u have to do to make things better. cuz if u dont tell then how can anything get done about it to stop it. but if ur parents did what they had to and got help thats great alot of ppl would have said forget it abotu it and divorced ur lucky there too. so know that u have the rite to be mad but sometiems its better for u inside to let go!

Answer 11

i'm sorry to hear that you have been the adult in your family. what city and state are you in. i think you should find a good christian church or whatever your preference is and go to teen night, start keeping a journal, write how you feel. but importantly it's time to talk to your mom. you will never bother your mom, your her daughter. she loves you more than anything in the world. you should go to her when your dad isnt around and let it out, she probably doesnt know how bad your hurting inside. how are your grades? this could take major affect in your studies you know. so it's time for you to talk it out, you've been quite too long now. it's unfair to you, to be so young to go through this. as far as your so called dad goes, he needs a mentor. you dont have a real cool teacher or dean, counselor that you can talk to. your father needs to talk to a real man, because he hasnt been taught how to be a parent and man in his household, his the provider, not the slander you know. maybe you need to call his sponsor, or get in touch with the churches AA sponsor they will come over and talk to him, what about neighbors, your best friends dad. you have to reach out to someone please dont keep it inside of you. i wish you the best.