I love everything about my life. Every day seems like such a blessing. Things are going well at work and I’m living with the man of my dreams. I feel like I have a good balance in my life. I am truly living a dream life. However my parents don’t see that. My parents live in Ireland and came to see me in New York for the first time and they are having a real problem with me living with my boyfriend. They told me that they thought America had changed me for the worse and that if I had any sense of propriety that I would come home. How can I get them to see how happy I am? I am 23.
2007-08-27 09:23:48 · 20 answers · asked by Caligirl 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Parents always see their children as ...well...children. You are an adult. You may just want to say, I'm happy. Is there any reason you can't be happy for me? Don't expect the light bulb to come on and complete acceptance, but if he is that great of a guy, he'll win them over. Good luck.
2007-08-27 09:30:30 · answer #1 · answered by Brain 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't, because you can't say that they don't know whats best yet. As parents we all hope that the choices our children make are the best for them. The fact that you are living with your boyfriend is not always a great choice and has a chance of failure. Your parents know this and are worried about you. Sometimes your happiness can blind you to the reality of a situation, don't know if that is the case here but you need to be open to that possibility.
The best thing you can do is be patient with them, they raised you and attempted to instill in you morals and values. You have made a choice to follow your own morals and values and not theirs. They deserve your patience while they make the adjustment. Since they don't live near you it's not a daily occurrence. Only time will tell if they really know best or not.
2007-08-27 09:48:56 · answer #2 · answered by Average Joe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, all I can say is that you have to chose which is more important to you. Its either your family that will always be your family and will always be there for you or the man that you love and cherish and your career. But if you simply can't chose then try working things out and try to start the relationship between your husband and parents over. Just tell your parents why you love him so much and prove that life in New York is as good or better than life in Ireland.
2007-08-27 09:30:22 · answer #3 · answered by Emily 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well since they live in Ireland, at least you don't have to worry about them being around. Send pictures of the two of you showing happy times together. Help them to understand that you have a happy life here in America, and let them know that you not planning to come home, unless your bf comes with you, and that would just be for a visit.
2007-08-27 09:28:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At 23 you are old enough to make your own decisions. I understand if your parents follow old rules and morals but if you are happy here in NY (Im a NY girl too) then you should do what makes you happy. Tell them that you have found happiness and that you want them to be happy for you. Lots of luck hun.
2007-08-27 09:29:56 · answer #5 · answered by shadowsthathunt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way to assert confidence is to act like you know what you are doing. Live your life and exude the happiness it brings you. Make sure your parents are aware of it. If the issue comes up tell them that you understand their concerns but that their are some things you must experience for yourself.
2007-08-27 09:27:54 · answer #6 · answered by Mister Shock 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can not make them happy. Anything you do short of living alone will not make them happy. Don't waste your time on it. You are 23 years young and have no reason to live up to ANYONE else's expectations. Live your life. They can accept it or not. Don't change who you are. Be safe.
2007-08-27 09:30:28 · answer #7 · answered by Steve F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Me and my girl are in the same situation. She is 25 and her parents hate that she lives with me (she's Irish, too, BTW). Her parents hate me, too. But her parents are just very old-school conservative. Sorry to have to say this but there may not be a chance of getting them to see that you are happy. All you can hope for is that they will one day accept it and let you live without threats of disowning, etc. I wish you all the best.
2007-08-27 09:30:05 · answer #8 · answered by Joe Dragon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well your parents do have a point. U r not supposed to live with a guy until u r married. But if u r happy. Just try to explain that to them. U r old enough to be on your own.
2007-08-27 09:27:38 · answer #9 · answered by Rachael H 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You can't. You're an adult you need to live your life. If your parents are that narrow minded and blind there's nothing you can say to convince them. Maybe you need to cut off contact with them for a while then they will appreciate what they have with you.
2007-08-27 09:32:08 · answer #10 · answered by Missy Saffron 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋