HIV and relationships?

Question

Ok to be stright up with everyone.

I met someone recently that I'm very attracted to, seriously. Not just for looks but just because this person is beautiful inside and out. Last night they admitted to me that they were HIV positive.

I wasn't freaked out or anything. I was just sorry for them.

What should I do? Can some one who is negative be with a positive person if they are very careful?

Answer 1

derekbradley if you were infected you would want somebody to love you too.

Answer 2

I would give it time to get to know them better. Then if after a couple of months i still felt the same about them, I would see an AIDS counselor at a local clinic and discuss the risks and what i could do to stay HIV free. I think it is statistically safer to use protection with someone with HIV to stay clean than Herpes. But if u fall in love with some1 with HIV u know they are going to be sick often and u are taking responsibity to share the burden. This is serious stuff and should not be jumped into. I dont think u are that kind of person based on what u wrote. I had a friend with HIV and it was hard to thinkof them being sick it made me feel like there was a huge injustice in life. Good luck to u and ur new love interest

Answer 3

This is a difficult question to answer.

If you decide to pursue a relationship with this person, you need to be aware that there will always be a risk to you.

Yes, it is possible for you to pursue a relationship. However, before you do so, I strongly suggest you talk to your doctor for information on how to avoid exposure if or when you become intimate.

Personally, if your partner is HIV positive, then you will be at risk no matter how many precautions you take.

As for casual contact, there is no risk to you. None.

This person has likely dealt with this before. They know the rejection that comes along with being HIV positive. It's unfortunate, but true. One of the best things you can do is be friends with them...regardless of whether or not you decide to take things to the next level.

I have several friends who are HIV positive. I don't let their HIV status affect our friendship. I have a chronic disease as well...diabetes. While it is not an STD, I could just as easily die from diabetes as they could from HIV. I must take insulin, like they take their triple cocktail. Maybe that is what makes our friendships so easy to maintain. We all have diseases that can be and often are fatal.

You need to sit down and talk with this person. Find out where you stand and what expectations there are (if any). Make an educated decision. Good luck to you.

EMT

Answer 4

Yes, it is possible. But that is usually due to a natural resistance to the virus... but there is no way to test for it. I have a friend who was into some VERY risky behavior in the 80's. He's gay, by the way. He watched every single one of his friends and ex boyfriends die. He test positive for HIV, and has tested positive for the last 20 years, but has never gotten AIDS. Doctors can't figure out why. He has unprotected sex with many, many guys that had full blown AIDS (this was before they knew what it was).

I watched an interesting show where they theorized that AIDS and HIV can be traced to the plague in Europe. That people who are descendants of plague survivors have more resistance to HIV? I thought it was an interesting show. I think it was on Discovery Health. You might want to check their website and see if you can watch it online.

Why would you want to take the risk? No matter how careful you are, even with condoms, you can still get it. Especially if you expose yourself over and over again. My brother's best friend is gay and he met a man he loves. They were together for three years before they had sex. They got married in Hawaii and are very happy. They love each other very much and I wish them all the happiness in the world. But now, my dear friend has HIV. Him and his husband go to the doctor together. They get their meds together. They are both still healthy, but it's very difficult. They want to adopt a child, but adoption agencies will not give a child to two HIV positive parents. So they satisfy their paternal instincts with my brother's kids. They are such wonderful people.

The point here? If you are meant to be together, sex shouldn't even factor into it. At all. Not until you are sure that this is the person you want to be with for the rest of your life. My friends were together for THREE YEARS, got married and then had sex. You need to be careful and you need to be 100% sure. You should know by now that every one is THE one in the beginning of a relationship, right? Then it all turns to crap once you get to know them. Obviously, eventually, the right person will come along... But you need to be SURE. This isn't to say that my friends didn't fool around with kissing and touching, but they kept all bodily fluids to themselves. HIV positive guy loved my friend so much that he would never, ever put him at risk. Even though they have been together for 10 years now, they are still using condoms, even though they both have the virus, because they want to limit the amount of virus they share with each other.

Be smart, be safe, talk to an HIV outpatient clinic (they can help you sort out the facts). I wish you the best.

Answer 5

That is a very scary and serious thing. You may really like this person and possibly love them....but is this the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? You have to remember if you contract HIV it will be with you forever.....so if you and her do not work out...you will have to explain to your future mates that you have it.....I personally would not want to take the risk...obviously people do all the time....just really think about it....or just use a condom every time....better than nothing! Good Luck.....

Answer 6

It is just like juggling capped dynamite sticks.

You can do it as long as you don't make any mistakes. But the first mistake will kill you.

If this does not turn out as a lifelong relationship, it will not only put you at risk, but it will also put everyone you have sexual contact with in the future at risk.

It is up to you to decide if the risks are worth the pleasure. If you think the risk is less than the benefit, go ahead, if not, keep things platonic. For me, I'd go with a strictly platonic relationship.

Good luck whatever you decide.

Doc

Answer 7

There is no reason why you cannot have a relationship. There are some precautions that you should definitely take, such as using safe sex practices, if that is where this relationship is going. HIV is a blood borne pathogen and is transmitted by body substances, most often from blood to blood contact. casual touching and holding hands will not cause infection.

Answer 8

as long as you do not have sexual relations with HIV positives it is good to remain negative..

whole world likes positive persons in various fields.

this is the only field where negative persons are preferred

Answer 9

Why take the risk? If the person is as good as you say they are, they wouldn't be interested in playing russian roulette with your health and life anyway. if they were, then that niceness you talk about is just cunning and manipulation for gain.

Answer 10

Yes they can... the HIV infected person should be on their treatments is all!