I'm not talking about the legal standpoint, but from the rather the profound view of marriage. I am a female revert to Islam, and I am having my Nikah this week, so any information would be most appreciated.
JazakAllah Kheir.
2007-08-27 00:32:49 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
Salaam! Wow, awesome, sis! CONGRATS! May Allah make you both a source of peace for one another as well as a means for attaining Jannah. :)
If you keep in mind the very simple things, then insha'allah your marriage will be wonderful.
First and foremost, aim to please God in all your actions. If we end up putting ourselves first, we often get hurt and hurt others. :)
Give (the good stuff)! People love to receive, and they'll give back, too!
Respect! I heard this is the MOST important thing. One should respect the other with the utmost respect. It's what every human being wishes from another person, and you both will truly appreciate one another.
As Allah says in the Qur'aan, you will be a garment for him and he will be a garment for you. That means, because garments have the following qualities, you should attain them as well as a wife, and he as a husband. Garments cover up flaws, they hide imperfections, they beauty a person, and they are the closest thing to a person (physically and otherwise.) As spouses, we are to cover up each others flaws (especially when talking to anybody except each other about one another), we should always hide their imperfections so others see only good from them. We should beautify them by saying good things and praising them when they do good and use kind words even if we are displeased with them. Lastly, they will become closer to you than anyone, that means, there will be a high level of trust and communication, so try to keep that bond always. You will also be closest to them physically, so keep those secrets to yourself, because sharing intimate details of your relationship means disrepecting yourself and your spouse.
I hope that helps! :) I am so happy for you!!! I hope you have a lovely marriage!
2007-08-27 01:15:43 · answer #1 · answered by Iram 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
In Islamic theology, both sexes are generally considered to be equal in value and differences between the sexes are recognized, resulting in different rights, obligations, and distinct roles.
Women are expected to be home-makers and caregivers to their children, and it is generally considered a good thing if they are educated as well. Traditional interpretations of Islam supports the traditional division of labour whereby women assume the main responsibility for the home while men are responsible for supporting their wives. Motherhood is seen as one of the most important roles in society. Muslim wives and mothers should be granted the respect due to all women for the struggles and sacrifices they make for the sake of their families. Mother has been given three times higher status over father. In most interpretations of Islam, Muslim women may seek a higher education, work outside the home or volunteer their services to benefit the community as long as their primary responsibilities are taken care of, they have the permission of their husbands and they do not compromise their faith in doing so (i.e. jobs that require them to dress in a fashion that is contrary to the Sharia -- Hijab).
congratulations on ur wedding! hope this helps!
2007-08-27 00:38:55 · answer #2 · answered by Sarah 2 · 4⤊ 2⤋
God tells the Men not to be Greedy and invest in a single healthy relationship. He wants them to be Thoughful, Loving, Caring, Polite and Kind to their Wives. He wants to tell the women to take good care of the whole family. He wants you all to Love the Children and respect the elders and Perfect yourselves enough to do it all.
2007-08-27 00:36:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
"God tells the Men not to be Greedy and invest in a single healthy relationship. He wants them to be Thoughful, Loving, Caring, Polite and Kind to their Wives. "
If this is so, how do you account for such horrendous treatment of Muslim women? How do you account for the killing of women because of their SUPPOSED disgraceful behavior? There's absolutely nothing, "thoughtful, loving, caring, polite nor kind about murder.
2007-08-27 00:46:03 · answer #4 · answered by nonefiner 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Im not going to go into the basic of what the Quran says about marriage and its status. Im sure you know these.
but if I was to speak about some teachings from both the Quran and Sunnah I would say the following to any one of my friends who are getting married :)
- Marriage is like a garment. You as wives are garments for your men, and your men are garments for you. (garments refers to protective clothing that shields you from harmful things) Thus, a mans duty is to his wife, like the wives duty is to him, protect each other and support each other.
- It has been reported that one day, Abu Bakr Assedeeq, was walking by the Prophets house when he hears his daughter: Aisha yelling at the prophet. He was overcome with rage as he entered the house and was about to beat Aisha for speaking in such a tone to the Prophet. The Prophet stopped him in his tracks and said, let her be. This was an example set by the Prophet about how to treat women. Even if they were being cruel, he would be patient and loving towards them. He understood the woman like no other man did.
- Showing love and affection physically. Both the wife and the husband are to show physical love and affection towards each other. They should try to please each other to the best of their ability as a very strong hadeeth says that it counts as a BLESSING in Gods eyes, when the couple engage in showing their love to each other, in sensual and non sensual ways.
- The husband is asked to respect the privacy of his wife, and not discuss her beauty, her performance or anything of the sort with other men or women. This goes for the wife as well.
-Honesty is the best companion. And if honesty fails the relationship, no amount of respect can redeem it.
^^ Thats it from me
Ill leave the rest for other answerers.
Congratulations!! and Best of Luck to both of you! May God reward you with all that your hearts desire in this world and in the next.
2007-08-27 00:54:36 · answer #5 · answered by Antares 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Well, my family is Muslim and so am I. My mom is originally from Poland, and my father is Egyptian. My mother doesn't cover her head, we're pretty religious but dont count on it for everything. We pretty much accept every religion. My parents have a healthy relationship. They make fun of eachother as in like friends do, like not in a mean way, they're pretty much like best friends and everyone in my family is counted as equal, even my younger brother. Most of us look Polish, haha. Anyways, hope that helped.
P.S. My father doesn't beleive in more that one wifey(:
2007-08-27 00:40:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 2⤋
Well, if you can't work things out, talk amongst the other wives and they'll guide you....ok
Have fun in your Nikahs!!
2007-08-27 00:40:06 · answer #7 · answered by headsiwin 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
"And of His signs is this: He created for you helpmeets from yourselves that ye might find rest in them, and He ordained between you love and mercy. Lo! herein indeed are portents for folk who reflect. " 30: 21
"And He it is Who hath produced you from a single being, and (hath given you) a habitation and a repository. " 6: 98
2007-08-27 00:39:04 · answer #8 · answered by Lawrence of Arabia 6 · 4⤊ 1⤋
Islamic Laws Regarding Rights & Obligations of Husband & Wife
Islam has put great stress on the relationship of husband and wife. It has clearly laid down the respective rights and obligations to avoid confusion and complication in this regard.
The basis of husband-wife relationship is love and compassion. In this regard the Quran states:
"And among His signs is this that He has created mates from among yourselves, that you may live in comfort with them, and he has put love and compassion among you (husband and wife). Surely in that are signs for those who think" (30 : 21).
The role of husband normatively revolves round the principle that it is his solemn duty to Allah to treat his wife with kindness, honour and patience, to keep her honourably or free her from marital bond honourably, and to cause her no harm or grief (Qur’an, 2 : 229-32 and 4 :19). The wife’s position has been explained in the Qur’an by saying that : -
"Women have similar rights over men as men have over women" (2 : 228).
The husband in Islamic law is under obligation to maintain her wife. Maintenance includes the wife’s right to lodging, clothing, nourishing, care and well being. The wife has a right to enjoy all these things according to her status and according to capacity of her husband.
The wife, however; loses her right of maintenance, according to the unanimous opinion of the Muslim jurists, in case of Nushuz, that is her hatred or defiance of husband or her attraction to another person.
In case of husband’s recalcitrance to maintain wife, the law enforcement agencies are required to enforce maintenance. The majority of Muslim jurists also allow the wife the right to seek divorce in such a case. If she wishes so, the court must comply with her request and grant her the divorce.
The wife has also the right to receive dower from the husband at the time or in consequence of marriage. The dower is a gift of husband to his wife. This symbolises an assurance of economic security from the husband towards wife. The amount can be big or small depending on mutual agreement and economic condition of the two parties. This is, however; no price of sexual enjoyment. This can not be so because sexual enjoyment is not a one-sided affair. (Ref: The Family Structure in Islam, Chapter 3, by Hammudah Abdul Ati, American Trust Publications).
The main obligation of the wife as a partner in a marital relationship is to contribute to the success and blissfulness of the marriage as much as possible. She should be attentive to the comfort and well being of her mate. The Quran mentions good wife as "comfort of eyes" (25 : 74).
The husband has been stated by scholars as the head of the family in Islamic family system ( infact, Qur’an itself has declared him Qayyim, which stands for manager, unit head, provider and protecter). It is the duty of all family members to obey him in lawful matters. However; Islam has enjoined on all Muslims to manage their affairs (which includes family affairs) by mutual consultation. However; in case of disagreement, the head of the family should be obeyed.
Husband alone has the right of sexual intimacy with wife. The wife must not allow any other person to have access to that which is exclusively the husband’s right. Wife has similar right in this regard.
Islam has given the correct principles and instructions regarding rights and obligations of husband and principles, if obeyed in true spirit, would ensure and social life instructions wife. These principles, if obeyed in true spirit, would ensure better family and social life.
2007-08-27 00:43:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatu.
First I'd like to say:
(( بَارَكَ اللهُ لَكَ، وَبَارَكَ عَلَيْكَ،وَجَمَعَ بَيْنَكُمَا فِي الْخَيْرِ. ))
"May Allaah bless you,send down His Blessings upon you,
and unite you both upon goodness."
I think you'll find the following articles very useful. I post them on my group page for revert sisters. You are most welcome to join the group insha'Allah. You'll find a link to the homepage thru my profile.
Guidelines for the Husband in Interacting with his Wife: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/1243
The Ideal Muslim Husband: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/432
Harmony in Marriage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/962
The Good Wife & The Good Husband in Islam: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/828
Marital Relations and mutual rights in Islam: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/445
Advice to Husbands: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/442
The Importance of Marriage in Islam: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/436
The Purpose of Marriage: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/435
Mutual Rights of Husband and Wife: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/WELCOME-2-ISLAM/message/420
Barak'Allahu feeki Sister
2007-08-27 04:59:54 · answer #10 · answered by Muslimsister_2001@yahoo.co.uk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋