For all beliefs (or nonbeliefs) EXCEPT Cristians. What is your opinion about this (concerning my miscarriage)?

Question

2 1/2 months ago I had a miscarriage. All I kept hearing is "it's wtih god". Why would anybody be cold blooded enough to say my baby is with their "god"? The god in the bible is a murderer, liar, and a monster who drowned innocent babies, according to their own book! He even ordered little kids murdered. What makes them think it would comfort me to think my tiny, helpless baby is with that sick, twisted, sadistic monster? Do they really think I should feel any better thinking that their sky daddy killed my baby? How ignorant are they?

For those who comment about my anger, or hating god: I'm Wiccan, and grew up Pentacostal and know the bible. I don't have any anger toward the christian god, because he doesn't exist. It's the thought of the bibles description of him that makes me sick. My baby isn't in any heaven or hell, it's sleeping forever.

Answer 1

First and above all, may the Great Mother in Her endless Compassion keep your baby safe and loved - and may She bring you peace of heart and spirit.
Second: I wish I could wave my wand and ease your pain - having lost several babies to miscarriage and tubal pregnancy, myself, I can tell you, just because you feel what you do, doesn't make it wrong. MOURN your baby. You just need to remind yourself that just because others may say things - usually to try to comfort you and usually not realizing they may be making things worse for you - that does not make it so - the Great Mother is one who knows what it is to rage at how unfair it all can be and knows what it is to lose a child - She knows your pain and can help you through it. The ignorant ones mostly likely mean well, but don't realize that their words are making you suffer worse. Have you come out of the broom closet? Not that it makes a difference to many of our families once we have, some families will continue to push the family religion on us thinking we'll switch back when we're done with our "phase", but it could well be that's what's happening, too. Doesn't make it easier for you - but if it would help, try to find yourself a bit of rose quartz and charge it with love for your baby - perhaps a little rose oil to bless it, a little water and sea salt to clear it first but when you hold it, visualize yourself with your child, then visualize yourself putting your baby in the hands of the Great Mother to protect and keep safe in pure, unconditional love - and carry that bit of rose quartz with you as long as you need it.
My own mother told me every time I lost a child that it was my body rejecting the child for some medical reason (she's a nurse), that there must be some reason the child couldn't survive in the outside world, so my body was taking care of things the way our bodies do. It became such a common thing that she almost jumped out of her sox when I recited those words back to her the last time I had a tubal pregnancy *sigh*. Nothing anyone says will take your pain away, but maybe YOU can find some peace for yourself and for your baby by choosing who your baby rests with.
May your heart, body and spirit be healed and may your baby's path be lit with love and compassion.
Blessed Be.

Answer 2

As a former Marine infantryman and agnostic (with atheist tendencies) I can confirm that there is a presumption of theism in the US military, however I never experienced the rampant idiocy described in your question, despite being subjected to numerous christian fundamentalists. In regards to supporting fellow troops under fire, I don't believe anyone trained as a part of a unit would ever hesitate long enough to evaluate the person's worth in regards to their religious beliefs (or lack thereof). Maybe it's an Army thing.

Answer 3

When a tragedy occurs it is natural, I think, to feel hatred and anger at God, and this anger is bound to spill over onto those who follow Him.
I am sure that nobody intentionally tried to hurt you, or to make it worse for you.
These Christians were trying to offer you the comfort and peace that they believe God can give to you. Some people have found solace in the concern of Christian friends when tragedy strikes...but some just need to be left to themselves to grieve. It is hard to know, sometimes, just how to comfort someone who is hurting so badly. It is even harder to accept the idea that nothing we can do or say can help...
I, too, am deeply sorry for your loss.
I can only hope that you will, eventually, come to terms with this tragedy, and move on with your life.
I hope you don't find it offensive if I say that I will be keeping you in my prayers...you see, I also lost my son, who was stillborn...and I, also, hated God for a time. People who came to me with these empty words only made it worse, and I hated them, too.
And I am a Christian...
How much worse it must be for you to be burdened with these sad attempts to make it all better...as if that were even possible.
There are no words to express my deep sorrow at your loss, nor can I ever apologize to you for what Christians have put you through.
All I can say is that I am weeping with you...and Jesus, also, weeps...
Much, much love to you...

Answer 4

Oh Dear I'm Wiccan & had one about 5 years ago. 1 of my problems is when Zelots start to rant against abortions, when that's all a miscarriage is. A natural abortion. Bet they spare no thought when their hatred spreads further then they thought.

But that's their problem not mine. As with their Bigotry and all the rest of their zeal hate inspited issues.

I try & look at it logically & consider that scientists now believe that spontanious abortions/natural miscarriages occur more often than we actually realise. That a full term pregnancy is more a wonder of nature than we'd otherwise have thought.

I know it hurts, but remember the childish's saying about "Sticks & Stones". It only hurts if you let it.
.

Answer 5

I am Very sorry for your loss...

I know my bible very well and I have an understanding of the scripture references that you are eluding to, however I do disagree with your interpretation, but that is not a discussion in your state of grief.

Just I hope that you know, that no one means you any offence when they tell you that they feel "it is with God". I hope that you are able to come to your own understanding and comfort and that whatever you believe in gives you the strength to persevere through this awful time.

I dare say with the spunk that you show in this question that you will, in time come to some peace.

Take care

Answer 6

First i would like to say I'm very sorry for your loss, miscarriage can be a hard thing and alot of people don't understand you get the , get over it or well at least it died before you got to know it lines.sadly with a child being in your womb you do already know it and love it.so a BIG HUG for that.that being said they mean well, people are just trying to comfort you.and they don't know any better. so take it as its coming from a place of caring.

Answer 7

You're right, and I'm very sorry for your loss. But please remember that these people compartmentalize their understanding of the Bible, and are in denial of the many negative & immoral behaviors of Jehovah depicted in the Bible. They only remember all the sweetness-and-light "God is Love" stuff that they are taught as young children. In their delusional state, they are telling you the one thing they think would comfort you.

Answer 8

I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriage. I can't imagine how painful it must be.

I'm sure they mean well. In their minds, their God is a loving, warm, comforting figure. As we all know, most of them haven't read their Bible, so they don't see him as how the Bible describes him. Maybe give them the benefit of the doubt.

Answer 9

You know, it's ok if you don't believe in anything.
It's ok if you're angry at G-d.
If you don't want to listen to what people are trying to say to you in their attempt to give you comfort, don't listen.
Comfort yourself.
Lashing out against G-d, is ok. A lot of people feel anger and frustration toward G-d when things don't go as planned.
You are looking for an outlet for your anger.
That's perfectly fine.
You can even lash out at G-d when you don't believe in Him.

Answer 10

They must not know that you are a non-believer. I'm sure they mean well, but they don't know how offensive things like that can be to a non-believer. The same things were said about my sister when she died and I raged inside. Yes, that stuff is hard to hear and I'm so sorry for your loss. If you were my friend I would hug you and cry with you.

atheist