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My bf of 2 1/2 years and I are taking a break.

he told me the most I can do while were broken up is kiss other guys, but no more than that.

If I do anything I feel like he might hold it against me when we get back together even though he's given me the okay.

If i end up dating/kissing another guy, could it ruin things in the long-run?

2007-08-26 12:07:23 · 21 answers · asked by Candicexx 5 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

21 answers

Whoa, whoa whoa. If he really cared about your relationship in the long term, why are you broken up? A guy that is truly a keeper will stay with you always, no matter how hard things get. If you're just 'taking a break', I find it hard to believe that it's reasonable for this guy to set limitations. If you aren't together, you don't have to answer to him--at all.

2007-08-26 12:14:08 · answer #1 · answered by Tellurium 1 · 1 0

By his rules yes the realtionship will be ruined. However, there are many questions to be asked here. #1 is he following his own rules? #2 what the hell do you mean by taking a break? You don't take a break from a relationship. I mean you can spent some time away from each other to calm things down but a break implies more. You see when you take " a break" you are allowing each other to date. If you are dating someone else then by definition you are no longer in a relationship. So by definition there is no such thing as a break if you date someone else. By dating I mean anything other than going to lunch with a coworker. Anything else means that you are not in a relationship. This means that you are free to do as you wish since I'm certain he will be doing exactly that.

#3 why are you guys taking "a break"? I think that what you guys are trying to do is see what else is out there before you commit. I guess is all depend on the agreement that you guys made. Are you just trying to see how others live kind of like an experiment. Well, that may not work because more than likely one of you will find someone who is just as good without all the bull. Even, if you guys get back together then there is the question of how often is this "break" coming about? IS every time one of you guys feel bored then you will take a break? I just don't think that will work. I know a guy who broke up with his girlfriend then sleeped with some other girl. Then he want back to his former girlfriend. By definition that is not cheating because there was no relationship at the time he sleeped with the other girl. However, that kind of thing can create distrust. If you distrust your partner or vice versa the relationship will suffer I can guarantee you that.

I think the first thing you must do is to define what exactly taking a break means both to you and to him. You two may have different definitions as to what that is. Then you must ask why are you guys taking a break. What is the purpose of the break. Is it to see what else is out there? is it to give yourself some freedom to see other people? Is it to help the relationship? What exactly is the purpose here. I think the fact that you guys are taking a break is already a sign of a failed relationship or at the least a relationship that is about to end.

2007-08-26 12:24:32 · answer #2 · answered by mr_gees100_peas 6 · 0 0

Sounds like he thinks of you, as a propterty or a kid sister.
If you and he are not in a relationship with each other, you can do whatever you want to, with in reason. If that's more than kissing another guy, so be it. Nobody can control their feelings. And so, if you broke up, what difference does it make if it ruins things between the two of you, in the long run?
Could it ruin things? Yes, but only if you're in a relationship.

2007-08-26 12:13:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

specific it is genuinely a impressive. And if this u . s . a . tries something like that i would be on the 1st boat the hell out of here. i'm no longer an excellent fan of totalitarian states. i do no longer think of there must be any rules to guard us from ourselves in any respect, in certainty i could legalize various of at the instant unlawful issues if I had the skill to. there is not any regulation against encouraging smaller households and maximum individuals in devloped countries are certainly having smaller households, yet once you're making a regulation on the bearinging of existence you have long gone to far. How could you implement it in any case? Fines for having a infant could be ridiculous and an insult to nature, and forcing a woman to have an abortion is in basic terms incorrect (and that i'm very por-decision). i do no longer think of I even have a "God given" impressive, i do no longer think in any gods, yet I do have organic rights, and that i think of I must be waiting to stay my existence thoroughly unmolested by the government as long as i do no longer do something to straight away harm yet another guy or woman. And this could be a grave violation of that theory. i've got have been given to bypass yet i could make sparkling my factor later.

2016-10-09 06:53:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If I were in your situation, I wouldn't kiss or do anything with any other guys even if he says it is okay. He is probably just trying to give you your space to do something different, but inside, I don't think he wants you to. So I think that if you want it to be good when you get back together, don't kiss any other guys. It is really your choice though. Good luck, I hope it all goes well :)

2007-08-26 12:14:58 · answer #5 · answered by Alex 3 · 0 0

I never understood the concept of 'taking a break'. And then to permit you to kiss? What kind of break is HE taking!?
When I was dating my now husband, he broke up with me. It was over and I knew it. So I started dating. One year later he sees me with someone else and decides he wants me back! The guy I was dating was nothing special, so I went back with my now husband.
And guess what, 26 years later my husband is still rubbing in the fact that I was dating someone else when he broke up with me!!!
Break up and move on. It could be a real eye opener and you may find someone worthy of you in the end.

2007-08-26 12:17:42 · answer #6 · answered by stephbbear 4 · 0 0

I believe if you do go out with someone else. You're most likely to develope new feelings for someone else and forget about your 2 1/2 year boyfriend. Do you really want that? If you guys truly love each other, none of you will do anything to forget about one another. It'd be best, to just give each other space but that's it. Nothing else or someone's gonna get hurt.

2007-08-26 12:14:25 · answer #7 · answered by Light/Dark Thinker 3 · 0 0

He gave you that "permission" because what he really wants is to go out and makeout with other girls.

I think you should worry more about the fact that he wants to take a break from you. People rarely get back together after they decide to "take a break."

If you want to go out and date and kiss other guys, then go for it, but let your boyfriend know that what you did while on a "break" is your business, not his.

2007-08-26 12:16:02 · answer #8 · answered by T the D 5 · 1 0

The two of you need to sit down and have an agreement about what you will and will not do. What was the purpose of taking a break, are you having problems or did this hit you out of nowhere? You can do whatever he agreed to, if he gets mad about it later he's using it as an excuse to get out of the relationship.

2007-08-26 12:21:59 · answer #9 · answered by ophirhodji 5 · 0 0

Yes, but then so could it for him. Don't think taking a break should include dating. If it does, it's not taking a break darlin. It's playing the field and looking for the next great thing. If you were taking a break, it would be to get to know yourself, not someone else.

2007-08-26 12:16:28 · answer #10 · answered by Phineas P 1 · 1 0

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