Why is that christians only want to pray for people rather than actually give them help?

Question

I find myself in a serious situation and have told many of my chirstian friends (many of them in a situation where they could help me , as I am days away from not being able to pay my rent and there will be on the street in a matter of time, and yes I do have a job but I don't get paid enough). Everyone I talk to says "I'll pray for you" but offer no help. I know that God works through people and doesn't through money or rent checks from the sky so if my fellow christians won't hellp, who will?

Kal

thanks for answering. I live in the cheapest place I can. I don't have transportation so I live very close to work and cannot be out alone at night as my apartment has heavy gang acitivy and I have been robbed at gunpoint yards from my door. I am middle age with no college education or real skills and have trouble learning what normal people can do, I mess up alot at my simple job too. I know a lot of people that have businesses but I don't have the qualifications or education to do the jobs and no money or time for additional training. I have a teenage daughter who lives with my mom (brainwashed by my mom) that I also have to provide for and spend time with on my off times.

Answer 1

It hasn't been my experience that Christians only want to pray for people...I know many people in my church (myself included) that give our resources (time AND money) to help people...I've given money to support orphanages in Mexico, I helped collect and package donations of food to help feed low-income famlies in our town, and much more.

Perhaps you need to examine your own role in the situation you're in. I would be happy to do more than pray for you if it is physically possible. However, would it really be "helping" you to give you money to pay your bills this month (or the next, and so on) and thus make you dependent on my financial help? If I ran a business and I could offer you a job that paid better AND that you were qualified to do, I would do so...have you talked to Christians that are in a position to help you this way? I would also be willing to help you find a cheaper place to live (that fits into your current budget) and volunteer my truck to help you move there...have you asked for this type of help from the Christians you know? I would also gladly help you get the education and/or training you need so you can get a better paying job that would support you...have you asked for this type of help from the Christians you know?

If you're asking Christians (or anyone else) for money alone, it isn't all that surprising that you're only getting offers of prayer. If you want offers of actual assistance, then you need to express a willingness to follow God's instructions for your life (and your finances) before anyone else can actually "help" you solve your problems. You may think that a handout will solve your problems, but it won't. I could give you the money you need to pay your bills this month but what about next month?

True Christian help IS out there, but you need to be asking for the right help. If you need temporary assistance to pay your bills, talk to your pastor...most churches I've attended will provide financial assistance to people who experience unexpected money problem. If the problem is more long-term, then money won't solve it...perhaps you need to talk to a Christian financial counselor who can help you reduce your expenses, perhaps you need to find a cheaper place to live, perhaps you need to train for a better job...and I know many Christians that would be willing to help you actually solve these problems instead of putting a band-aid on them by throwing some money at the problem!.

Answer 2

First..prayer is not cheap.....but you are Sooo right about what you wrote. What good is prayer if someone doesn't bring it to pass or rather make it happen? Example: A rich man passes a poor man and says "Sir, I'll pray for you", when he could have given the man some money, food or a even a job. That would have been prayer answered. Maybe someone had even already prayed for that man and the rich man coming by was the answer to the prayer and instead of helping, they offer words, not action...you see? Your so-called friend was wrong for what he did to you. Wanting you to yell out in the parking lot like a mad man??? Biblical people are supposed to help others in need. The golden rule of the bible is to treat others the way you want to be treated. If he had helped you it would have also been a way to minister to you. His help would have made you say "Hey this belief/religion is good and maybe I should look into it because it's followers are loving and kind. Instead, his disregard for your well being made you say.. "Hey this religion is not what I want to be involved with because its followers don't have love in their heart. Sooo sad and it's not right. I hope the best for you. And you can send your friend this message. If he is decent, Maybe he'll feel shame and repent for his ways against you. Peace and love.

Answer 3

Prayer is the best thing they can do for you. It would be nice if people helped you in your situation, but we are responsible for our choices and must get ourselves out of them. I have helped a friend in need recently with money (which has not been paid back) and other things, but this is nothing compared with what prayer can do. The hard thing about prayer is sometimes our prayers aren't answered when we want them to be answered or we don't get the answer that we want. I've been struggling with that recently myself. I do take great pleasure in the fact that people are praying for me though, because I have faith that God will lead me through this difficult time and will answer my prayers when it is time. God bless!

To the person below - while I definitely could use the money I lent to my friend, I know she's going through a very difficult time right now. I try to live in a way that God would be proud of, so I'm more than willing to forgive the debt and just hope that I've helped in a small way. That's what Jesus would have done.

Answer 4

While I agree with you that Christians should help others who are worse off, even most Christians have trouble paying their own bills. In your case, it must seem that this is not a one-time emergency, but that you will need support for a long time to come, since you've got a lousy job and no skills. I don't know of any simple solution for you, much though I've thought about it. You've got to find a way to get a full-time job and earn enough to survive on your own.

Answer 5

You need a different job or a 2nd job or help from the government. You can't expect people to just hand you money. Most people are living from paycheck to paycheck as it is. When they say they will pray, that is their way of helping you. Have you prayed for your circumstances? Do you go to church? If you do go to church then many times they can help you with such things. Just because someone is a Christian doesn't mean they automatically have to give people monetary help.

Answer 6

Dear Really Fed UP!

I am sorry for your Situation... and emphasize with you and your daughter.

Please take with an Honest Outlook some of what I will share with you. I read many of the Boards.. and Many are Asking for Handouts. I even visited a Local Church where they were helping a family... and the wife told me that her husband has been on the church circuit for 3-years. From church to church for help.

Please, I am in No Way... insinuating that you are doing the same.

PERHAPS.... it is time.. that YOU Prayed... and asked GOD.. which church.. YOU SHOULD ATTEND?

A Church I attended... had a group of Elders....that met with the... " Person In Need " and sat down with them... and had them fill out a declaration of expenses / income... FORM... and then worked out... A WRITTEN BUDGET... based on that Declaration.

When EVERYTHING... income and expenses... WAS WRITTEN OUT... there was a complete PICTURE... of where the Monies.. were going TO!

Then those elders.... added FUNDS... to help that PERSON or FAMILY!

MANY.... that came to that church... WOULD NOT DO THAT... and were consequently... TURNED... AWAY!

Perhaps.... some of these Suggestions would help YOU?

Sit down.. and WRITE OUT... your income... and ... your Expenses... and THEN... find a Bible Believing... CHURCH... and ask them... FOR HELP!

When ONE... comes with the FACTS.... then they will Be Willing TO HELP!

Hope that will Help YOU! Email if you care to.

Thanks, Roger R.

Answer 7

Are you putting material gifts from Christians as something better than Gods Blessings? You are mistaken, Gods blessings are of much more value than a mere handout. I could give you $300.00 to help you, but this would only help until next month and you would find yourself in the same situation again. If you have faith, God can pay your entire mortgage off, if it be His will to do so. Perhaps you have not been faithful with what God has already given you. Maybe God is trying to get you to depend on Him and not on humans.
God works through any means possible, if He wants a rent check to fall from the sky, He will do so, remember, He caused Manna to fall from the sky to feed the Israelites. You cannot tell God what He can and can't do, rather, what you believe He can or can't do will come to pass in your life. Stop looking to human beings for comfort and start trusting God Almighty, His Gifts and Blessings are eternal. I am a Born Again Believer and I am commanded to be a good steward of all God has given me. I myself, struggle with financial issues at times and am not always in a postion to help someone else. God will lead you to the right person or situation of His choosing. He will put it upon this person or organization to help you. First seek God and then you can seek His blessings. God is not a lucky charm we carry around in our pockets and make a wish upon it whenever we need something. He is God Almighty and most importantly He wants you to spend eternity in heaven with ALL His riches and glory and Blessings. Before I came to know Christ Jesus, I too "knew" of Him through Christian acquaintances but I was indifferent to Him and lived in rebellion against Him. As the Holy Spirit convicted me of sin in my life, I ran and ran away until finally I found myself living in my pick-up truck during the cold winter months. It was then that I started talking with God, I was very angry with Him and would curse Him and say I hated Him. Now I look back, I am ashamed of the words I spoke to Him, but God did not care, He loves me and He waited years for all my pain and anger to subside. Little by little my prayers became less hateful and more loving and more remorseful. If God had not allowed me to become (Broken) I would never have trusted Him or put my Faith in Him. Now, instead of cursing God, I praise God for what I
went through. I may not always be faithful to God, but God has and will always be faithful to me. The pain I had to go through, then and even today, is the best Blessing I could ever ask for. Much better than any material thing I could have or will ever receive. I sense you may be approaching this same time of decision in your life. Fear not, God is always with you and He will always meet your needs according to your faith. Pray and ask Christ Jesus what it is He wants from you at this very moment. God Bless You....Peace.

Answer 8

Prayer is good, prayer and action are even better.

Kind of reminds me of the guy who was in a flood. He climbed up on his roof, and as the waters were rising, he prayed that God would save him. A fellow offered the man a life jacket, but the man refused, saying, "Thanks, but God is going to save me." A boat came by, and the man said, "Thanks, but God is going to save me." A helicopter flew overhead and dropped a line, but the man refused to be raised to the chopper, saying, "Thanks, but God is going to save me." The waters continued to rise, and ultimately, the man drowned. When he found himself at the Pearly Gates, the man demanded to be taken to speak to God personally, and so he was taken. He addressed God, and said, "God, why did you let me drown? I was a man of faith on earth - how could you let this happen." God replied, "I sent a life jacket, a boat, and a helicopter; what did you want - and engraved invitation?"

Your friends need to help, and you need to ask them for SPECIFIC help; some folks need a hit over the head instead of just a hint :-)

Answer 9

Sounds like the answer is as simple as a second job, or maybe do some begging on the side!

Answer 10

I can't talk right now...I'm getting my passport together for the trip I am taking to India to visit our Bishop in Calcutta to help with the hospice care of those dying from various diseases and offer them help and care.

You might have just uttered the most ridiculous thing I've ever read on Y!A. And that's saying something!