1. "Frankly, Scallop, I Don't Give a Clam." (Seen on Cape Cod)
> >
> > 2. "That's It! I'm Calling Grandma!" (Seen on an 8 year old)
> >
> > 3. "Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew
Up"
> >
> > 4. "Procrastinate Now."
> >
> > 5. "Rehab Is for Quitters."
> >
> > 6. "My Dog Can Lick Anyone."
> >
> > 7. "I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts - Do You Want Fries With
That?"
> >
> > 8. "Party - My Crib - Two A.M." (On a baby-size shirt)
> >
> > 9. "Finally 21, and Legally Able to Do Everything I've Been Doing
Since
>15."
> >
> > 10. "ALL MEN ARE IDIOTS, AND I MARRIED THEIR KING."
> >
> > 11. "West Virginia: One Million People, and 15 last names."
> >
> > 12. "FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION. It comes bundled with the
software."
> >
> > 13. "I'M OUT OF ESTROGEN AND I'VE GOT A GUN."
> >
> > 14. "A hangover is the wrath of grapes."
> >
> > 15. "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance."
> >
> > 16. "STUPIDITY IS NOT A HANDICAP. Park elsewhere!"
> >
> > 17. "DISCOURAGE INBREEDING - Ban Country Music."
> >
> > 18. "MOOSEHEAD: A great beer and a new experience for a moose."
> >
> > 19. "They call it 'PMS' because 'Mad Cow Disease' was already
taken."
> >
> > 20. "He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless dead."
> >
> > 21. "Time's fun when you're having flies...Kermit the Frog."
> >
> > 22. "POLICE STATION TOILET STOLEN.... Cops have nothing to go
on."
> >
> > 23. "FOR SALE: Iraqi rifle. Never fired. Dropped once."
> >
> > 24. "HECK IS WHERE PEOPLE GO WHO DON'T BELIEVE IN GOSH."
> >
> > 25. "A PICTURE IS WORTH A THOUSAND WORDS, but it uses up a
thousand
> > times the memory."
> >
> > 26. "The Meek shall inherit the earth.... after we're through
with it."
> >
> > 27. "Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana."
> >
> > 28. "HAM AND EGGS - A day's work for a chicken; A lifetime
commitment
> > for a pig."
> >
> > 29. "WELCOME TO KENTUCKY - Set your watch back 20 years."
> >
> > 30. "The trouble with life is there's no background music."
> >
> > 31. "IF THERE IS NO GOD, WHO POPS UP THE NEXT KLEENEX?"
> >
> > 32. "Suicidal Twin Kills Sister By Mistake!"
> >
> > 33. "The original point-and-click interface was a Smith Wesson."
> >
> > 34. "MY WILD OATS HAVE TURNED TO SHREDDED WHEAT."
> >
> > 35. "Computer programmers don't byte, they nibble a bit."
> >
> > 36. "Computer programmers know how to use their hardware."
> >
> > 37. "MOP AND GLOW - Floor wax used by Three-Mile-Island cleanup
team."
> >
> > 38. "Nyquil - The stuffy, sneezy, why-the-hell-is-the-room-
spinning
>medicine."
> >
> > 39. "Quoting one is plagiarism. Quoting many is research."
> >
> > 40. "My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He
thought
> > he was God, and I didn't."
2007-08-25
20:08:49
·
14 answers
·
asked by
Jim Jnr M
6
in
Entertainment & Music
➔ Jokes & Riddles