How can I help myself through my depression?

Question

When I was young I was sexualy abused by my sister, at the time I was younger than ten. I remember several occasions one which included the neighbors daughter. At the time I didn't understand what was going on, but every since I was about 12 and older I have felt demoralized and worthless. I am now going on 24 and I still can not look a woman in the eyes without guild and sorrow. I really don't have any family to consult and I am embarrased to tell any friends I do have because of the shame I feel. I find myself alone and dreaming to have a family someday, but I know in my current state that a healthy family is impossible. I feel I must work through my depression before I can achieve my life goals, but I have no clue where to start.

Answer 1

Therapy. It's the best thing that ever happened to me. You can't imagine how free you can feel just by telling a complete stranger your deepest and darkest secrets.

Answer 2

Joe the one main to consider is that you are not alone and you must seek professional help a Psychiatrist not a psychologist or Counselor. Depression is an illness there are chemical changes in the brain that need to be addressed first and foremost, it is after that you will need therapy. But bare in mind that you are not the offender but the victim. However, you can not dwell on your victim status, that was then and this is now. There is nothing to feel ashamed about especially when you were so young and your older sibling probably not knowing any better herself abused her position of trust over you. Like I said you are not alone look at all the Catholic Children that are coming forward all the time abused by people in positions of trust. Not only that the vast majority of sexual abuse cases are committed by family members or offenders that are known to the family or victim. So you need to get over your feelings of remorse and shame because you are not the one to blame.

Answer 3

Get yourself a male counselor who is at least 40 years old.
You also might want to get into a good diet & fitness program.
Here are some good ideas:

1. Do something that gets your heart rate up a bit like, walking, running, biking, and swimming.
2. Eat Whole, Organic foods like: Broccoli, Cabbage, Organic Brown Rice, Spinach, Sweet Potato, Apples, and other fruits and vegetables in their Natural State.
3. Avoid eating corn, white bread, white rice, candy, sodas, chips, and anything else that you already know you shouldn’t be eating.
4. Drink clean water as your beverage of choice. Avoid Fruit drinks and fruit juices (unless YOU juice them yourself)
5. Stop smoking, drinking beer & wine, and drinking coffee.
6. Get 8 hours of sleep each night.
7. Hang out with people who want to be healthy.
8. Avoid anything with High Fructose Corn Syrup.

Tone up the muscles:
1. Join a gym and get a trainer.
2. If you’re short on cash, start a light stretching & yoga regimen.
3. Do push-ups, and light dumbbell curls for the upper body.
4. As I said above, walk, run, swim, and or bike.
5. Take an aerobics class, a yoga class, or some other fitness class.
6. Join the local YMCA..

Mental Health:
1. Get a friend to talk to each day about your feelings.
2. If you have some money or insurance, get a counselor to talk to.
3. Learn how to meditate.
4. Join a support group for the issue you’re dealing with.
5. Ask your Higher Self (or God) for guidance.
6. Start keeping a diary or journal about your feelings & thoughts.
7. Write a ‘gratitude’ list every night.
8. Do something that makes you happy each day like: listen to your favorite music, draw, paint, write, or anything creative.
9. Do something for someone else who needs help.

Answer 4

Find a support group in your area or seek professional help.
You are right,working through the pain and shame is the way to move foward and grow strong but I don't think you can do it alone.
You are not alone.
There are lots of people like yourself who have been affected by sexual abuse .
It is very difficult to speak about and I think it is important to choose carefully who you share with.
Other people who have been through similar experiences and have had help and have experienced healing are understanding and inspiring.
So are those who are working on moving on like your self.
There are also lots of books availiable that address healing from sexual abuse.Check out your library.
It is really worth seeking help.
You can feel better .
I wish you well.

Answer 5

believe it or not, you have already started on the path to healing, by admitting to there being a problem in the first place!

You see, I see this:" I want a family + previous baggage not worked through= unhealthy situation for everyone involved!"

I congratulate you for being able to see this, and not be wreckless and just screw up other people lives just because you want happiness! I want to tell you that I'm sorry for what happened to you (even thought that's just trite sounding) and I will pray for a peaceful, fufilling recovery for you.

I'm going out on a limb, but I don't think you need a bunch of counseling- because you are already in the right track, certainly no psych drugs or anxiety or depression drugs- stay away from those, (in this situation, only) I think that's not a benificial path for you. i don't think you really even need to go lay on the therapists' coach, really, un less you just want to. i think you have it all figured out, you just want a fast & easy way to deal with the pain- not physical, or like you are trying to run away from it- you have accepted it, this is clear from your question.

My experience from these things is this- the only thing that works is time, and just talking about it. talking about it abunch. the mind has it's own healing processes, and it sounds like you have done a bunch of the healing already, you just want to hurry up and make it "drop the other shoe." i don't think that's gonna happen by anything you do- other than talk about it. Just believe you are, ok. because You are. You know all the rest, now just really sit back in the chair you are reading this from and take a deep breath, and relax, close your eyes and think to yourself, "I'm ok, and I will have the family that I'm dreaming of, and I will be the best ___ever!" Because you can! Sit and just self anaylize for a bit.Do you really need to carry that shame with you? It's just a bag of old bones, that you drag behind you everywher you go. Just say "I'm through with it" and you really will be, and if you have doubts- just remeber that you threw those out, and that you are going to keep going strong, just like you were before the doubt came on. I know that I make it sound trivialy easy, but that's really how I try to look at things. I have devils in my closet to, and have constantly battled with depression. I don't think there is a magic wand out there for you- there is a switch in your head, that only you know how to flip, when it is time, and not before. I wish you the best of love, and email me if you want, I sincerly hope you can work it out.

Answer 6

I feel pity for you. I suggest you to continue your dream to have a family someday. Work hard and concentrate to it and meanwhile see a psychiatrist to make calm you better.

Answer 7

Get the right advice from worthwhile people.
Please check sites below.
You not alone !
God Bless !

Answer 8

See pages 2, and 20, at http://www.ezy-build.net.nz/~shaneris

Answer 9

you might need professional help with this, maybe you should consider therapy of some sort

Answer 10

smoke pot. seriously. id stay away from booze or pills or anything else that could kill you and invest in a bong instead. or you could see a shrink... but maryjane is all the shrink i need.