A highly intelligent friend of my is chosing to become a state trooper than to contiune his education and get a masters. I was elected by our hgroup of friends to be the one to "talk to him" about it, and to "push him into getting his degree", but I feel that who am I to try to make him change his mind when he seems driven. Still in yet deep down I am scared for him Hiowever I know that a good friend should support the other.None of our other friends know that we are intrested in one another and have started to date. I haven't mentioned how I feel about the state trooper thing. I have only congratulated him through gritted teeth, but the "girlfriend" side of me wsihes I could just sit down and explain to him how I feel without killing his dream. What should I do? Adult answers please.
2007-08-25 09:47:14 · 6 answers · asked by Malc T 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I don't think a relationship should ever become a deciding factor in chasing one's dreams. Long term relationships are too hard to maintain and the person will never forget who talked them out of it. Wouldn't want to be the one with that responsibility...
2007-08-25 09:53:42 · answer #1 · answered by Lady Bug 277 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do, at this point, is support him while he is trying to fullfill his dream.
I know that being a state trooper is a very hard profession. It is also a scary profession, especially for his family. Make each day you have with him special.
2007-08-25 09:51:13 · answer #2 · answered by Diana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's his dream/desire to be a state trouper, then both the friend and girlfriend in you should support him in the pursuit of that. It would be better for him (and you) to be happy as a state trouper than miserable in further schooling and a career he's not passionate about.
So support and encourage him.
However, that doesn't mean you can't express to him your fears, thoughts, feelings, concerns, etc. But do it in a loving manner while still supporting and actively encouraging him.
2007-08-25 09:52:59 · answer #3 · answered by beckilou78 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if anyone should try to change his mind but rather to talk to him about the implications. I think a good friend should sit and talk to him about his choice and maybe ,while talking understand him and explain your thoughts of what he is doing and what the future he is building for himself....do talk but don't tell him not to do what he hopes to do....that decision is his and that you are just pointing out , talking it over with him and making honest comments of what you think .....but respect his final decision......remember. he is the one who is responsible for himself unless you are more than a friend......My question to you is would you accept him without his degrees or ....be honest to yourself.....what is good for him is it something that will deter you from being his friend....but maybe, just maybe, discussion might make him see other perspectives of his plans....and maybe will see a valid reason why first to complete his education then going on to something else....good luck , choose your words carefully and work at being fair....
2007-08-25 09:58:56 · answer #4 · answered by frieda l 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just talk to him. Tell him your opinions, if he disagrees, then move on. Tell him that the group asked you to talk to him, tell him their message, if he doesn't like it say "Of course I'll support you whatever you do" or "it was only a suggestion."
2007-08-25 09:55:06 · answer #5 · answered by hottotrot1_usa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is wrong with becoming a State Trooper?? Leave him alone........It may not happen.......just wait and see.........
2007-08-25 09:51:38 · answer #6 · answered by ginny3282 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋