My ex ended things 6 mths ago. It was very serious, things changed over a fairly short period when she said her feelings had changed.
I tried to sort things with her for app 1 mth, she didn;t want to get back together.
We lost touch for 2 mths, we both dated other people briefly, neither worked.
We then got back in touch. Although we put the "as friends" label on it, it clearly wasn't. We lapsed back into doing exactly the sort of stuff we did when together,cooking for each other etc. There was clearly still attraction there.
After 2 mths of this, I decided to let things develop and give her space, I raised us trying again. We had been sat around talking about all the good stuff we did together etc My ex said she didn;t want to try again but, bizarrely, agreed we were very good together.
I said being friends wouldn't work, we would be putting a label on something that wasn't true.
I said we shouldn't be in touch unless she realised she had made a mistake.
Thoughts?
2007-08-25 06:13:53 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She wanted to stay in touch and keep seeing each other "as friends", I said that just wouldn't work, it would be weird.
I thought she was wanting to have her cake and eat it a little bit i.e. a bit of a surrogate boyfriend without the committment. We weren't sleeping together though.
In saying we shouldn't be in touch, she will have to deal with stuff without me, harsh I know, but I am not around, absence makes the heart grow fonder etc
2007-08-25 06:15:27 · update #1
sorry to say, but not unless she thinks she has made a mistake, and personally no female would admit to making a mistake...
2007-08-25 06:16:44 · answer #1 · answered by always wonderin 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know the answer to this one. I would take the "Friends with benefits offer" if I was you.
You see some girls think/feel that there is less pressure in the relationship if your just friends. Can't see how, but that's the way they think. Cause at the end of the day, you really don't have to get too emotionally attached.
Problem is you will become attached, But if I was you (and this is the risk your going to have to take) I'd keep going "as friends" cause at least you get to see her and have great times together.
2007-08-25 06:27:46 · answer #2 · answered by againyourright 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. It sounds like you 2 are still an important part of each others lives. You'll probably get back together too before you realize that it'll never actually work out. Then you'll break up for good. Yup, that about sums it up.
2007-08-25 06:19:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What can you do when you love someone. You see them, it hurts, you dont see them, it hurts..... She has the control here because you love her more. Sadly you will only probably have closure when she meets a new guy. Always better to be with someone who 'loves you more'. I dont think you can make plans here. You cant help how you feel. We all know what we should do but when you love someone, you love someone.
2007-08-27 19:39:58 · answer #4 · answered by Sarah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you lost an opportunity to have a friendship with someone who knows you inside and out.
To be fair though, if you can't deal with it, then be honest with her and just tell her it's all or nothing with you, that you can't deal being in a friendship with someone who you still love.
2007-08-25 06:25:28 · answer #5 · answered by Michael H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She might change her mind, but I dunno. What were her reasons for breaking up, anyway? It sounds like you guys had a good thing going... I guess I don't get why she wanted to give it up.
Honestly? I think you'll hear from her, but it'll be because she wants/needs something, not REALLY because she wants to get back together.
2007-08-25 06:18:25 · answer #6 · answered by Samantha S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats sucks. Mayb she doesnt hav feelins like that about u at all, she just doesnt wanna hurt ur feelins. U at least need to talk to her.
2007-08-25 06:19:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋