Can anyone-ANYONE-help me?

Question

I am a 39 year old father of, well, alot, but three of my children in particular, I am very concerned about. I am about to fight for custody of my three and a half year old daughter and 1 year old twins-a boy and a girl. I have been trying to get Child Protective Services involved, but these people are BLINDED by my children's mother's lies and deception. She is physically abusive to my 3.5 year old, and negligent to all my kids. My 3.5 year old was left alone in a room with the twins and this woman's other daughter, and she marked up the tv COMPLETELY-meaning her mother was doing SOMETHING. What-I can only guess. She BEAT my daughter, leaving welts across her shoulder. My baby is petite. This babies' mother-not so much. A few days later is when my kids' mother walked in on my daughter being raped by her nephew. Instead of snatching the boy off, her dumb behind ran downstairs to get her sister, after shutting the door behind her! Who in their right mind...? Anyway, she was crying to me

on the phone that she didn't know what to do. I told her that she need to get her nephew some help, because it is not the first time something like this has happened. The little boy did the same to the girl this babies' mother had before we met, and to one of his father's neices! These people just continuously sweep things under the virtual rug!
Okay. That's my 3 year old.
My twins? This female will stay on the phone and computer ALL day, and let the twins sit in their diapers all day. ALL day. My babies buns look all blistered and raw. This female is slack. She doesn't clean up.
I know. I should have left her alone. But the fact of the matter, my children are suffering for my mistake and it's not fair to them. They didn't ask to come here. They deserve to have ME take care of them. This female is so unfit, it is pathetic and CPS doesn't even see it...

I WISH I could take pictures, but 3 weeks ago, after someone-NOT ME-contacted CPS, she up and disappereared with my kids! I didn't hear from this chick at all for two weeks. She changed her cell number on me twice! I did finally get the number when she called me at my twin sister's home, and two days later, she changed it again! I miss my kids so much. I can't afford a good lawyer. I am really praying that someone will be sympathetic to my cause and take me and my babies on, pro bono.

I PROMISE I am being real. I absolutely agree. This is nothing to joke about.

Social services removed my babies' mother and my kids out of the house where she was staying, and placed her first into a hotel. She stayed in the hotel for four days, and of those days, I made sure she and my babies and her other daughter had food and drink.
For example of her neglegence, one of the nights while she was in the hotel, she was watching TV, and my son was playing with the plugs on the outlets. She was looking RIGHT at him, and didn't say a thing. When I yelled at him and tapped his hand, she said "Why did you hit him?" and I responded, "Didn't you see him touching the plug?" She claimed she didn't. The next day, she went to Social Services, and told me that they were placing her into a shelter. She lied about her cell phone being off-she actually changed the number.
NOW, if she was trying to get help cuz of our 3 y/o, why did she lie to me about all this other stuff?
I have court coming up very soon. I NEED your prayers for strength! This is a HUGE pill to swallow.

Nrsldy-I live on one side of town, and these kids live on another. Now, she called ME and told me what happened, and when I asked her if she wanted me to come and get the 3 y/o and take her to the hospital, I believe I should have done so without asking her first. BUT she told me that there was no penetration. I asked her to check her really good, and she told me everything was fine. DUMB old me... Her mom doesn't like me, so I can't be there when she's there-she lived with her mother(she's 26 years old) and we just found out that she's bipolar with I believe some paranoid schizophrenic tendencies(cuz she says she hears voices). That would explain why she tried to kill herself a few times since I've known her. AND THESE BLANKETY BLANKS WON'T GIVE ME MY BABIES? They are leaving my kids in harm's way.

Answer 1

Hey Buddy, you are 39 yrs old. If you feel this helpless about the situation how do you think your children feel? If CPS has not done anything to help then I would start making some noise.Start raising your voice when you talk to them, tell them you are going to the media.Ask to speak to their supervisor,don't stop there either. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Go to your family doctor and tell him what you have written here. Don't stop there either. Record everything,dates times witnesses etc. Get other family members involved. Don't stop! These kids need your help,you cannot fail them. God be with you.

Answer 2

If you're being serious, and you had better be (screwing around with these sorts of things is just wrong). You need to get a good lawyer, and march down to family court and file for an emergency order of custody. At the same time you will file formal allegations of physical and sexual abuse, neglect and child endangerment.

Those will go directly to a judge who will look over the situation and have the children go to you (so long as you have no prior history that would make you an unfit parent) while the charges are investigated.

You need to pool together anyone who might be able to vouch for you in this situation, either your ability to parent your children better than her, or people who can attest to their abusive situation.

You'll be appointed a social worker who will do things like set up counseling for the children, which will determine if and how badly the children are abused.

A good lawyer will be able to make sure things keep moving, and that you have the best shot at getting custody.

NEVER be inactive. If you cant get something done on the phone, go in person to the correct office. That alone says a lot about your concern and the validity of your allegations.

Answer 3

Does she have legal custody of your children, or just "implied" custody (where neither of you have gone through the courts, but they live with her full time because you chose not to fight her for them)? If she doesn't have legal, court appointed custody, then you can take them out for the day and not bring them back and there isn't a thing she or the police can do about it(that is the case in Canada anyway). It's a sin what is happening to these children, especially your little girl, and if CPS isn't doing anything about it you need to do everything in your power to get this dealt with. Keep calling them if you have to. Even DAILY. And if they continue to ignore you and your complaints, call your MP or local government representative. They will get involved on your behalf and make sure that CPS is doing their job. If they are over looking welts on your baby's little body, go to the highest level of their organization and make a complaint about the social worker who did the investigation. They obviously aren't doing their job, so if after contacting every one you can and nothing is still being done, go to the media about how this organization is not doing what they claim to be all about- protecting the rights of children- I'm sure if you got this in your local newspaper, someone would give you free legal counsel.

Answer 4

I am soo sorry to hear this.

Childrens protective service is a joke they never seemed to be there for kids that really need there help but they try to make cases on people that are there for their kids.

I would make a lot of heat. Meaning go at them with all you have plus some. Demand to know why someone isn't doing something. I mean this has worked for my ex mother in law and she won temporarily because she made them feel my kis were in danger from me and my family. I won in court because of course it wasn;t true but if you aplly the heat to a situtation that truly needs intervention you will come out on top and your kids will win.

If your child is being molested you can call the police. And make sure you let protective service know this. Protective service doesn't get involved with children molesting children but they will investigate for failure to protect. Especially if you have any proof that this other child has done this before and she left her and him in a room toghter unsupervised.

Also it may be what you are saying is why they arent going out to investigate. I mean if you tell them that she was left in a room and drawed on a tv, that dosnt mean she is neglectful.

Just make sure you dont ramble, and you have all your facts.

Also call every day if you have to , talk to supevisors, contact a counsler and they have a duty to also contact protective service in a case like this as well.

I would suggest calling and getting some advice from lawyers and trying to go it alone if i had to. I mean sell your personal items to save your children. Dont stop being their adovacte if this stuff is really happening, your kids life depend on you.
Good luck

Answer 5

You need to do whatever it takes to get these kids out of there, police, social services whatever. If you can get the kids to call child line or the NSPCC or equivalent even the police they will listen - as soon as the child makes a complaint as serious as this, they will be removed from the situation.

Keep a diary of everything they tell you dates, times so you can use it as evidence if it goes to court , if possible take pictures of the injuries on your phone or whatever , record conversations do whatever you can to get the proof.

Talk to the neighbours, they could prove to be vital witnesses as well!

In the meantime you need to make sure your place is ready and fit enough to have the kids live with you. Also don't give up keep reporting the incident and call up everyday until they are removed.

I hope you manage to get them out soon! X

Answer 6

I'm very sorry at the position you are in. I suggest you get a good lawyer & fight & fight as much as you can.

I kinda have a similar story but, it's with my siblings. My siblings (3- 2 brothers & 1 sister) have a diffrent mother than I do. Well, their mother is very abusive. She stuck one of my brothers in a dryer. She didn't turn it on but, she stuck him in there. She was physically & mentally abusive. Well, my dad & I have tried to call Social Services at her & she ran from them. She would leave her house early in the morning and come back late at night, and it worked. They finally GAVE UP ON HER! I was like, are you serious. It's like they don't care about the children.

Like I said, I'm very sorry & just stay strong & fight.

Good-Luck.

Answer 7

Print your question and take it to the police - if no actions, start taking pictures and recording all you can - even if the recordings are made without her knowledge and may be inadmissible in criminal court, they will be taken into consideration in family court - the rules are different. Take action, complain to the authorities and keep complaining - if all else fails, enlist the help of the media (big city media, especially) they will often champion cases of keeping children safe.

Do something, do more, and do it again and again until you save these children.

Answer 8

Well you should make a trial and go to court and just tell them that it runs in her family that she was being abused by her nephew and that yoou dont want such bad influences round your babies. get all the facts write them on paper get some evidence take pictures of the welts ect. then you are sure to win the case..
I mean you dont want tour children having bad influences at that age it could ruin their lives forever!

Answer 9

Hi, I would go to Social Services and tell them everything you have told us, if they don't listen i would go to a solicitor and tell him/her. Your daughter and your twins need protecting from their mother and her nephew. Tell them you want the police involved and you want to apply for custody and you want him prosecuted. I can't tell you what i would have done to the nephew but he wouldn't rape any innocent child again. You must keep on with the authorities, until someone listens to you. Good Luck.

Answer 10

I cant help wish i could but persevere don't give up keep nagging the right people my father gave up and left me to an abusive mother and i don't have anything to do with him now for abandoning me good luck and i have just thought of something i can do pray