Its ok if a 21 year old GIRL dates a 17 year old GUY?

Question

Well, im just curious about it...

Just met a guy, i thought he was around 20-22

But Surprise!
he wasnt.
he's 17...

Ok, just to make some things clear


I know that it's not ok

but well, Anyways i think that he have a girlfriend, he is really mature, and he is in university, not in high school, (yeah, dont ask me how, cuz i dont know)


But that was my mistake, i thought that at least u have 18 when u are in university..!

Clearing things again


Im not a pervert or such thing...

I just hang out with a guy of my same university, which looks like 20-22 years old... mature, mentally and phisically... I didnt do nothing wrong, curiosly i just asked him, how old was he, and he told me 17. ( i guess that he thought i was 19 or something too)


Before it, my friends told me to go out with him, cuz he was hot, and blah blah blah... you know..

But, then when i told them that he was just 17, they were shock, just as me... I even thought that he was playing when he said his age...


Then, i thought, well, 4 years is not much... but the problem comes when im already 21. I've seen girls 17 dating guys 21. So is that so different if it's the girl who have 21?!


but both of us get surprised by the age, cuz he's 17 and im 21...

Answer 1

as long asu dont have sex lol..

Answer 2

Well I'm 20 and have had a few people say I look about 13 or so. So that is just a point of references as to looks being very decieving. As for him being in college at that age its possible because there are some high schools that allow accelerated students to take classes over at the local college. So that isn't too uncommon either. I had a girl that was still a sophomore pretty much doing that at my previous college, very common. Now back to you actually dating the guy, I don't think that would be too wise. I mean you are already very much legal, drinking legal included in this. And you are at college, dating someone that much younger would only hamper your college experience. I mean you can't obviously go to a bar with him. And you know you can't even do anything physical with him if you wanted to. So I think its best to leave him alone or just be friends. Because you are treading dangerous grounds here. Not to mention there are different levels of maturity like with anything else. He could be mature enough and mentally intelligent enough to be doing accelerated and a few college classes for credits. But that doesn't really mean he is mature enough to handle a older girl, that may be very horny or is into more serious partying than going to class right now. See some people have book smarts which is on the maturity level of being diligent about studying and taking good notes and things like that. But when it comes to dating they could be all thumbs. And at that age he could be just trying to impress you by saying he was older, hoping you might do stuff with him, but if you really did he may have freaked out. So just because someone is mature you have to find out how mature they are and on what level of maturity it is. Besides that always ask around about a guy before jumping into the sack or dating them. Because in the early stages both parties are trying to make themselves look good and may fib about a few things. Age however is something very, very serious that no one should mess with. Because rape can be called on someone rather quickly and you or someone else be left looking dumbfounded for not knowing the person was under age. So be careful and use your own older years of wisdom to realize he is just a kid and keep him at that.

Answer 3

It may depend on what State you live in. But in Oregon 17 is the age that's OK to date. But I recommend you just keep being friends until he is 18 and then if you two want to pursue anything more OK. This way you will have the time you need to really know more about him. You don't want your heart broken.
He sounds like he really may be more mature then most guys his age. Which is really unusual for guys.
Don't risk losing your soul mate if you feel that way just because he is 4 years younger.
4 years will be nothing when he is 20.

Answer 4

No. He's under aged. I think that you guys should be friends. If you do date him, your friends and people in your school might look at you differently. I know that it's only 4 years of difference, but he's a minor, which makes thing more complicated. Wait until he's 18. Get his # and call him when he is an adult. You've got nothing to loose by waiting.

Answer 5

Statutory rape doesn't exist without sexual contact. You can date him if you like, and as long as there is no sexual behavior you'll be fine.

The real answer to your question depends on what state you live in. Different states have different ages of consent, although (especially in recent years) the distinction between older men vs.s older women has largely vanished. If the age of consent in your state is 18, and you have sex with a 17 year old, you could be charged with a felony.

Answer 6

Well 17 y/o guy's are usually immature, but whatever. It's not THAT big of an age difference. 4 years is not HUGE, but you need to be careful in terms of the activities that you do do with each other and how far you take those activities out in public.

Also, look at Jessica from Laguna Beach who was dating Cameron. That was like a three year age difference.

Age ain't nothin' but a number :]

Answer 7

there are many girls who at 17 go out with guys who r ur age so why should it b any different the other way round... if u like this then it shouldnt matter... 4 years isnt that much and not long away he will b 18 so wot does it matter then!!

Answer 8

basically.. yes
its fine. just be cautious of the laws around your area. if he is under age. some laws vary here, as far as he age goes.. be careful not to go to far with him, until he is of age.
i have dated guys older, younger , and much younger then me. but just take it easy and slow. you don't want to get hurt either. Guys have a tendency of being a bit younger emotionally, and the way they process thoughts. each person is different . I am in no way saying all guys are immature, just some can be. others act way older then their age. so . as i said, be careful, take it slow,get to know him, but have fun too.

Answer 9

Seems to me like he could get carried away. You're quite likely his first, and he'll get addicted. You'll end up psychologically wrecking the guy if you break up, and he'll be emotionally dependent on you later in life. Ala cradle of filth, nymphetamine.

Answer 10

17 y.o. ppl can't date anyone but 16, 17, 18, and 19 y.o. ppl.

16 is the youngest to date. They can date ppl 2 yrs older.
So a 17 y.o. can date ppl from 16 to 19.

Anyone over 18 can date who they please.

Answer 11

Be friends for now, and just wait till he turns 18 so that you can get intimate with him. That will be fair enough.