Why Do guys cheat?

Question

i dont get what did i do wrong??? i just dont understand! my ex and i had about 2 months going out am 15 and he is 17! i found out he played on me with another girl and we broke up! but i dont get it! was it my fault he cheated on me? all my friends and his friends saw i was a good girlfriend! my familly loved him and so did i! was it my fault? i feel terrible and guilty! i loved him sooo much!

hey thank you everyone!! you guys make me feel better! everyone made my day!!

Answer 1

1. Males mature slower than women
2. When males discovery sex it is on their mind for that point on at least 60% of the time and often they crave it.

The best survival strategy for a male is to breed as fast as possible, with as many women as possible, as frequently as possible. It takes some guys a while to get control of this primordial drive, if ever.

For women the best survival strategy is to develop relationships to help care for them and their young. So women want a boyfriend who they can trust and won't cheat on them, while the guy wants to be like a butterfly and to go to as many "flowers" as possible.

Your problem is with one of his "design features." He needs maturity to control it and clearly doesn't have enough to remain faithful. I wish I could say it won't happen again or that it is rare, but the opposite is true. My only advice is to keep trying and to not look at who you are first attracted to, they are usually the worst choice.

Back in the caveman days a woman needed a good protector so the "dangerous man" was a survival strategy, and women needed them and craved them. In modern society those are the guys who will get in the most trouble, but your basic evolution hasn't changed since we were cavemen. Humans stopped evolving when we started to force the environment to change to suit us; this started with the discovery of fire, and then continued with the discovery of tools.

The guy you are most attracted to at first sight is probably the “dangerous guy” and not a good choice so look for a guy who will work well with you. Frankly the more homely the guy is the more likely he is to stay true to you. The “dangerous guy” will always be popular and he will be given more chances to stray because more women will be attracted to him.

You are hardly alone in this discovery, it as a story as old as mankind. You can learn from it and you can learn that if you tell the guy that honesty and faithfulness are very important to you then you are going to reduce his chances of straying, and give yourself more reasons to be angry if he does.

Most men are very attracted to women, but fear speaking with them and that is a major fear. The possible dating pool is larger than you think it is. If you see a guy you want then ask him out for a study date. If that works then you can signal him you want the relationship to go further. If you ask the guy to lunch or for something innocent like a study date then you are not coming on too strong, but you are clearly telling him that you are interested. The worst that can happen is that he will say no. To a guy the worst that can happen is that you will laugh at him and his friends and enemies will never let him forget that. This is why guys are less likely to ask a girl they want to ask out first. So be a little bold and go shopping for the guy who suits you better.

Answer 2

Love, don't worry so much ! You're only 15 :). The worst thing you could do is wonder what YOU did wrong especially since its not your fault. He cheated on you for selfish reasons and you had nothing to do with them. Guys cheat & there's no reason why you should be with a guy who cheats on you.

If you feel terrible & guilty, you're sadly mistaken. You should look at this and say "well, I was the best girlfriend and he was just an ***." There will be MANYYY guys who you'll love and in order for you to have the best relationship in the end, you need to learn from problems like these.

Again, good luck & don't worry love. Try to do things for yourself to help you gain more confidence & you'll be fine in life.

Take Care!

Answer 3

It was not your fault. He is older than you and probably needed someone around his age although what you are by what you are saying you did so much as a good girlfriend. By all means, that is excellent from your part as being a good girlfriend. Its his loss and not your fault so do not feel terrible. And above all, take from this experience that situations may change but people dont just in case he may want to get back with you. Dont change what you do or your personality for anyone. Stay good and true.
Good Luck

Answer 4

Your view is not acceptable. It's not like that guy's always cheat. There are so many points like, Lust, Opposite sex attraction and lack of self confidence. There is one more possiblity that if some girl cheated him then he is satisfying himself by cheating other girls. Or Simply... after achieving his goal he simply put u in trashbin. But dont loose your confidence because of that guy. Life is so beautiful and small so enjoy each and every moments... either ups or downs.

Answer 5

for the same reasons girls do- for the excitement and the acceptance they receive from an outside person...they can tell this other person all their good quality's and all your bad stuff and paint themselves as a hero-instead of cheater.Also alot of the reason is people are fed up with something or someone and looking to blow off steam and do it by having mindless sex...its a great distraction but never truly fixes the problem.Its not your fault this person hasnt realized what loyalty and respect he should show someone he says he cares about,however stop idealizing him in your mind-I cant imagine what crap he said behind your back to woo his hoes but maybe you should start thinking about it-you deserve better

Answer 6

You did nothing wrong!! He is just a weak willed horny teenage boy.. Once you get older, it will get better. When your about 18 and you start dating men and not boys, and they have had a chance to mature, Your relationships will get better !! Until then, date just for fun. Because this is a very turbulent time in both males and females lives, slow down and take things easy for a while. You have plenty of time on your hands, so enjoy your life while your still young. You'll have plenty of time for life's drama's when your an adult !!

Answer 7

Most of the time when a guy cheats it's more of a communication problem than the girl's fault.
He could have felt something was wrong, and if he talked to you about it things would have been fixed, but he was afraid to, etc.
Guys cheat because they are cowardly and don't want to deal with problems in relationships or are jerks and just want to have sex.
Don't eat yourself up about it. Move on, you don't deserve to feel bad because he was stupid.

Answer 8

You have to remember that it's never your fault when someone cheats on you...it's 100% theirs. No matter what, you can't make another person do something they don't want to do. You didn't make them be dishonest, or look for other people, or lose all self-control. So, in my book, there's never an excuse...if he didn't want to be with you, he at least should've had the decency and respect for you to tell you before moving on. He'll probably cheat on his wife someday.....

Answer 9

The reasons guys cheat are the same reasons women cheat.
They are many but are similar.
Better to find out now than later. It is always a blessing to move on.
It is sad to sell your old car, but how wonderful is your new car. Relationships are similar. Be happy to have the chance to be happier.

Answer 10

alrighty this is a good lesson for you to learn now. men are men and sorry to all the guys out there who are cool but they suck. cheating is most of the time not your fault. my guy friends have all told me that men just have some compulsion to be with all women everywhere. i think that is crap. i think it just makes them feel good to know that they can get anyone. i know it hurts but try not to dwell on it. find a better guy.