revenge on childhood enemy?

Question

Up until the age of 12 I had a good childhood. It wasn't until I moved in with my dad and his new wife I had problems. I was pretty much a carefree kid until I was molested by my older-step brother. I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me, but I really do hate this person, and I want to know if I should take revenge on him. I'm 25 and pretty much had low-self esteem since 12, do you think it would be terrible for me to take revenge? Everyday I feel like crap, and all my relationships have been affected while this person doesn't acknowledge anything wrong. I just can't forgive myself until I make his life misearable too. btw, in middle school and high school this person spread rumours behind my back, and stole all my friends. I know revenge is petty but this person deserves much worse. And I don't believe in God, so pretty much what is done is done. Thanks for the help!

I can't take legal action because the statue of limitations is 5 years and this happened more than 12 years ago.

thank you for all your answers, this person was 1 year older than me, and did it, because he hated my father, because he didn't like the fact he was with his mother, this person is not openly gay but plays both sides

after he molested he we got into a fight but I wasn't able to defend my self which is why I want revenge (fight him)

yes he was molested as well, i heard from his mother

thank you for all your answers, thx

he hated me because I had a really hot girlfriend, of course we broke up later though

Answer 1

I don't know what you have in mind for revenge, but I do think you need to address your situation about now. You've kept it in all these years & it's eating away at you. You honestly have to share it w/someone who can help you overcome it. IF there is a way you can speak w/someone professionally about it, that would be the BEST way to handle it. He is a sick disgusting person. Too bad you've kept it inside all these yrs. to the extent of making you feel the way you do about yourself. HE is the one who did this to you. YOU did NOTHING to deserve his behavior twds. you. You were an innocent child & he took that from you. I can appreciate your bad feelings twds. him to say the least. Does your dad have any idea of what you've gone thru all your life? Is there any way you could have a heart to heart w/your Dad, tell him the situation & your feelings. You KNOW he would defend you & give you the support you so badly need. You have done NOTHING to be ashamed of. You were the one molested, the one abused. I would never turn MY own child away should they come to me w/your situation. I do NOT feel your dad would feel the same way. Let it be known what a disgusting excuse for a human being this person is. Let your dad know PLEASE. He w/help you, he w/take care of it WITH YOU. AND, there IS a God, He also w/deal w/this person in HIS special way!!! PLEASE get help for this, don't suffer needlessly any longer. You are NOT the only person who has lived w/such a "secret" & suffered needlessly when you CAN get help, Please do it...for YOU. You DESERVE IT!!!

Answer 2

You are 25.
1) You can stay scarce from that home environment and the lack of support from your parents. In fact, I recommend it.

2) You can get into a counseling/support program of some sort... "survivors of incest" group or something like that. Check with the city health services or United Way. You need to process through all this rage before it ruins your life.

3) Taking revenge is not good. It would have you wearing the black hat in the family. It would also probably land you in jail. If you really, really have to, try something simple like stuffing a potato up his exhaust pipe. Just don't get caught.

Try therapy first.

Answer 3

Hell yes, revenge would be going to the district attorney's office and asking what you can do to satisfy your "hurt" and keep others from getting "hurt". If they don't get the ball rolling, search the Internet some more as where to go for information about exposing this person. You have to realize he was probably molested at one time himself...from whom? Not your problem, let him fess up on that one when he's fighting the charges! We need people like you to stand up to "evil" and protect our children. Thank you for having the guts to share this.

Answer 4

i don't think you should take revenge first i think you should confront this person and tell him how you feel, but in the end be the bigger person no that you were hurt and that it's ok to hurt but sometimes even though its hard you need to let it go. I was abused when i was younger mentally and physically and i had alot of hate stored up in me but the only life i was ruining was myself because they didn't care. I had to move on if you are dating share your feelings with your spouse let them no what happend and let them help you through it... I am 21 years old with a husband and our first child on our way. If this doesnt help see help go to a therapist. I know you said your not a christian but i have to put this in here because i am praying and seeking God helped me alot. You will get through this the best thing to do though it's just to move on with life don't let the past dictate who you are. And the only one who can let you feel inferior is yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror and say i had a rough past but i am a strong person and i can get through this. I am worth this life.

Answer 5

You should seek legal action if this joker did it to you...how many other kids is he molesting? Getting put away a pedophile is much hasher than anything you could ever do to get even.

Answer 6

You could try to press charges against him, but with it being so long ago, I don't know if the charges would stand. You could say you were scared to tell anyone and have kept it in this whole time.

Answer 7

Don't do it, just find a way to put him in jail and get a peace of mind on your own

Answer 8

take him down take him and beat the living hell out of him thats so wrong of him hes a sick freak i hope he go to jail so and gets raped or you could call michael jackson on him