Is it immoral to date when you are logistically seperated from your mate?

Question

Please hear me out, okay? I am NOT talking about screwing around, I am talking about respectable adult company of the opposite sex. I mean, take this sceanario: your husband/wife is overseas working, and you both agree to remain 100% faithful physically (sexually), but you both agree you may have a friend of the opposite sex for company (like to go out and see movies, zoo, dinner...etc) nothing more.

I admit, this takes will power to do, and both partners must be honest and in accord, and faithful. Some could argue this is NOT being faithful, but I label it being real. What do you think about it? I feel sorry for people who have too little will power to resist being unfaithful when you gave your word to be so.

Sorry, I don't feel a lady accompanying a gentleman to a movie and dinner, and nothing else, is being unfaithful. It's up to you to let them know what the deal is, and check your own feelings.

St.Loius fan...My view is NOT skewered. It's different from yours, nothing more, nothing less.

Answer 1

Dear proud_infidel,

There is nothing immoral about a man and a woman going to dinner or a movie (especially if their spouse) has knowledge of it- but i can say that it may not always be a wise thing to do. When two people of the opposite sex spend large amounts of time together (especially when they are lonely, etc.) it can be a temptation to cross a line that you don't want to cross.

i guess a thought is why you couldn't go to the movies or dinner with a girlfriend or a group of friends.

The dynamic you are suggesting has the "feeling of a date" though not the "label of it."

Also you don't always know the motives of the other person who you ar going to dinner with. There is nothing immoral about it- but it can lead to things that are immoral.

How many affairs have started- because someone was meeting an emotional need that their absent spouse wasn't able to meet?

Anyhow those are my thoughts.

Kindly,

Nickster

Answer 2

Outside a professional working relationship I would never recommend a husband or wife to have a serious friendship with some one of the opposite sex that involves dates and situations where they are together without the husband/wife invovled. Does that make sense? No I would not be buddies and hang out with another woman without my wife being involved. If SEX is the only thing that you view as sacred in marriage you view is skewed.

Answer 3

Yeah - why even go there.

If you need company, there are plenty of women who would enjoy a night out to see movies etc..

You started out asking if it is immoral and ended up saying that you don't think it is unfaithful.
Either way it is unwise.

Answer 4

There is nothing wrong with having friends of the opposite sex. Going places and doing things as friends. As long as that is all that it is. But you might end up spending alot of time explaining it to other people. Just decide whether it's worth it or not.

Answer 5

While there may not be anything unfaithful with what you are describing it is certainly a step in that direction.

Answer 6

there's a word for what you are describing. it's called "friendship". People do it all the time, and as long as you and your "date" know your limits who cares what anyone else has to say about it--other than your spouse of course.

Answer 7

I feel that anything that you would normally do with your spouse {who may not be at home} but you do it with someone else, is wrong

I have male friends, but I do not go out with them if my husband is gone out of town

Answer 8

So you're saying that you don't mind your husband dating other women when your not around?

(What are you nuts?)

Answer 9

I don't see anything wrong with a platonic friendship.