My 4 yr old keeps hitting the cat and pulling its tail. Would a physical punishment (kind of a, "do you like it?") be best, or would a timeout/take toys away punishment be best? I have already talked to him about it, but i cant decide on whats the best punishment. Thanks
2007-08-24 09:34:48 · 18 answers · asked by Jessica 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Toddler & Preschooler
Spanking for a physical/assaultive offense doesn't make sense. They understand time-outs and taking toys away better. Just make sure you do what ever you threaten or all you are teaching him is that you lie. Make sure you give the punishment IMMEDIATELY after. Stop what you are doing and put him in TO or box up his things.
2007-08-25 18:00:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to your child to find out the exact circumstances. Regarding the alcohol, they may have been put on the spot and pressured by friends to let them drink it or drink it themselves. If that is the case then you have some self confidence issues to work on separately. As for punishment. I would definitely find your child's currency and take that away from them. Figure out what is most important and that is what gets removed. Even if it's an upcoming dance or family trip. They should have to stay home. If you have other children this will definitely set an example to them and you will less likey have problems with them in the future. Where the other kids are concerned that drank you alcohol, I would consider talking to their parents and if you are not comfortable with that then simply remove the alcohol from the house when you are away. Then you can't be held responsible. If they bring it into the house when you are not there, then you can not be held accountable for contributing to them. Then if it is a case where your child was pressured, I think they should still be punished, but because they could not stand up for themselves, poses as another problem for them. And that is where you step in reassuring them that sticking to their beliefs and parents rules will not only earn them self respect but the respect of their true friends.
2016-05-17 06:08:50 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO, never hit if you don't want the child to hit. All that teaches is that hitting is okay for big people! I'd try timeouts, with a firm, "No!" whenever you see him hurt the cat. Later, after timeout (when you've cuddled him), help him pet the cat gently and praise him. This combination of immediate removal from the scene and training and praise for appropriate behavior should eventually work. Some kids take longer than others to learn to control their impulses, but it's good for him and with patience and consistent enforcement on your part he WILL learn.
2007-08-24 09:43:21 · answer #3 · answered by stoneinthestream 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hit a child to show them not to hit?
At 4, he knows he is not supposed to be doing that. Stop talking and swoop him up and plop him on the naughty chair.
Time-out chair and taking the cat away and loving on the cat.
When he gets out of the time-out you might show him how to love on a cat without being mean.
You might even keep them separated for a while-like the rest of the day- to show that kitty has a right to be there, too.
If he continues, you might consider giving that poor cat away -at least for a while.
If he bites the neighbor, you going to bite him?
Make sure he understands this is not going to be tolerated. Just like hitting a child.
2007-08-24 09:44:18 · answer #4 · answered by Lottie W 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Since the problem is happening with a living thing, your cat, i agree with one answerer- pull her hair a little when you see her pull the cat's tail, a little harder everytime you see her do it, and it is important to be consistent. Explain to her everytime why you did it, and that you won't pull her hair if she won't pull the cat's hair. It hurts, and she'll make the connection. This method will stop the behavior in a matter of 2 days or less (i have done it), as the time out will take weeks, and you should take the cat into consideration as well. Good luck!!
2007-08-24 09:55:51 · answer #5 · answered by Angel♥Baby♥Girl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I can't possibly see how hitting your child back would prove anything, so I'm going to go with timeout and loss of favorite toys as best. If you've already discussed this with him and he still isn't being kind to the cat, I think it's time to separate them before an accident happens. Animals, no matter much we personify them, are not people and do have a breaking point when it comes to tolerating such things.
2007-08-24 09:39:51 · answer #6 · answered by Magaroni 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Try the time out method for 2 weeks straight...4 yrs old = 4 minutes. Be consistent...he pulls the cat's tail, he immediately goes into time out. When the 4 minutes have passed, make him apologize for his behavior. Make him say...I am sorry for being mean to the cat.
2007-08-24 09:39:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure once that cat swings at him and scratches, he won't bother it anymore. But...you don't want your poor cat getting picked on. My son is 9 1/2 months and I've been teaching him "gentle touches" so when he's older he already knows.
I would try a time out and see if that works.
2007-08-24 11:20:04 · answer #8 · answered by Due Feb 25th with a girl! 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
depends how long he has been doing it if its a recent thing try to find out why hes started (TV,DVD, older child he looks up to) while I'm not totally convinced time out works it is the way to go in the mean time you can only hope the cat comes to its senses and gives him a good scratch this was the only thing that worked for mine but remember no sympathy when the cat decides its had enough
2007-08-24 09:52:27 · answer #9 · answered by mini 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you need to establish a naughty spot...kids don't understand that they are hurting the cat...physical punishment is never ever ever the right punishment for anything...and as i said a 4 year old doesnt understand too well
2007-08-24 09:51:21 · answer #10 · answered by missbabygator1983 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋