why love should always make u suffer?

Question

my boyfriend and i had a fight, we are not talking to each other now 4 2 weeks, we also work together, but the problem is he knows very well that i get jealous very easy , so, he choosed a very silly girl ,who really hates me at work, and he always trying to get me angry, joking and talking to her, and looking to me to watch my reaction, i can't believe how childish he is. A really good friend of mine is trying to stand by me. he is a very good person. But he never did any thing to get him jealous..but my boyfriend can't stand him too...all i want is to get the one i love close to me again, but he changed i don't know why. He's not the kind person i used to know. I tried to talk to him but he was so stupid , it was just like "oh remember, ur the 1 who came to start talkin",and when he felt that i'm avoiding him he started to tell our friends many times he's situation,and that he is annoyed that i'm joking& talkin with others but not 2 me,but im not doin that.. im really suffering him

Answer 1

Well first, things first, love is something we give ourselves, its not some special gift he wraps up and shoves into your brain. Its something you let yourself feel for the things he does. With that said you suffering for picking a very immature person to love, for what reason, well thats personal to you, could be as shallow as how good looking his butt is, to something as complicated as he was the only person who understood your perception in life, really its yours to know why and not mine to guess, so on to the other bits of wisdom. Understand the reason love hurts people so much is becaue they only WANT romantic love, which is a nice fantasy, it isn't love persay, as its only a small part of it. So also notice its also a FANTASY, no ones perfect and no one can love perfectly so this whole ideal of perfect love in a inperfect world is kind of overly romantic. Also understand that love isn't enough in any relationship, I mean honestly if it was would we have a 75% divorce rate? Also realize that our society has a lot of things wrong, like the fact is that FRIENDS make GREAT lovers, but lovers rarly ever become even DECENT friends. Its just the way it works, also its easier to play love games with a stranger, then it is to play with a friend, more intense. SO realize in a way your suffering because of you.... sorry, but in the end we ether have to blame ourselves, or your never going to be able to accept the fact that HEY you've got free will on weather to deal with this crap are not, were not powerless to love, we just think its so gosh darn romantic if we pretend to be.... of course true love on the other hand is another story all together, but thats beyond romance, right smack into the bowels of reality, which if you looking for that, talk to your guy friend, if you want the romance, keep chasing that boy!