When you are breaking up with someone, does religious faith help you deal with the pain?

Question

This is currently the situation I find myself in, and my life is changing radically because of it. Everything about me is hit, particularly my financial situation, so there is a lot for me to take in.

My question, though, is for those who have been through this--and let's face it, who hasn't--does faith provide comfort? I have gone from despondency to numbness, and now am strangely calm, although I feel like the real pain will hit later. Have you had your faith be a comfort to you? If not faith, what has helped pull you through these times?

Answer 1

I've been through some tough times myself (financially and otherwise), but things have always gotten better. And that's the part I have to remember each time, "things always get better". That helps me a little.

Answer 2

At the outset, my faith was in question, for I had a difficult time understanding what my Source intended for me beyond what I thought was being with the love of my life. I did not deny my faith, just wanted to know what was up.

It was the faith my dearest friend had in me that helped me through my times. It was almost an undercurrent, a constant droning on and on, telling me I still had value, I was still worthy, I was still special, and did not need another to make me feel that way. This is really what helped. My faith kept me going, because I knew there had to be a plan. But feeling that depth of pain, I needed physical comfort from physical people. The hugs (which for me were long distance, because my best friend lives 1200 miles away) got me through it.

Try to remember that we are spiritual beings having human experiences. When it gets to be a tad overwhelming, that is when experiencing your humanity with other humans has so much value.

Then just waited for Source to open the next door . . . .

((((((((Jack)))))))) -- can you feel the love from all of these people? You are SO not alone.

Answer 3

My faith has carried me through many hard times, the most recent being the loss of my husband last year. We prayed together, and he died in my arms. I was numb, and did not really begin to deal with the loss for a few months. My finances were tied up, so the first few months were a blur of paperwork. Looking back, I did what I had to do, then I grieved. I look upon the numb feeling I had as a blessing now, because I did get the things done that secured my finances. I miss him, and have no intention of ever being with anyone romantically. My choice, because I feel like I had the best. You are young, and I am sure you will love again, maybe even reconcile with your girlfriend. My loss, while great, has never been unbearable. His Grace has been sufficient.
{{{{Sweet Jack}}}}

Answer 4

I don't think religious faith helps very much with anything at all, but those who believe it does must get some comfort from thinking so. I rely on dealing with reality, and learning from it so there's a profit in everything, no matter how painful. And I've had enough bumps to know that what doesn't kill fattens. And what doesn't kill doesn't matter so much either. Slam the door - I'll go through the window.

Answer 5

Jack, my friend, Faith does help and so do friends. Break ups can be very difficult, the sudden romantic detachment can cause lots of Pain in the spirit. So its a grieving process. You need to go through the process. What i would advice as your friend is keep no ill feelings whatsoever to your significant other. Instead forgive yourself and her completely. Give yourself time, you will feel times of lonliness, its inevitable. I will email you Zikr, its remembrance of God that sufis do. It will take you out of the zone and right next to God. Over there, you will only find pure spirits. I dont want you to resort to drinking or anything else. You have to face the situation buddy, this will remarkably change your soul. All the best, my best wishes above all my love and respect to you!

Answer 6

Jack, I'm so sorry bro, I have been there. Faith really didn't play a huge role in my healing, but it was a factor. More of a combination of friends,family and faith. I say this to you though, with complete honesty, I have only known you for a short while and believe me when I tell you that from what I've seen you have a good heart, strong character, superior intellect and a decency that is a rare find in another human being. I wish you well.

Your Friend,
John

Answer 7

My faith has given me comfort many times, but not really in these situations. In situations like that, my friends and family have helped more than I could say. The thing that has always been best for me personally is to do something to take my mind off the situation. It's probably escapism to some degree, but sometimes you just gotta escape.

Answer 8

((((Jack))))
there is nothing quite so heartbreaking as being alone. No matter the circumstance.

Yes I've been there - both apart from my faith and within my faith. I have to tell you - experiencing heartbreak and aloneness within the confines of my faith was in actuality the most open and freeing I could have possibly imagined. It helped me immensely.
I am an introvert by nature - but I found that no matter what, God wouldn't leave me alone. Whether it was someone who called to say hello, or people who dropped in or dropped off what I needed and then disappeared..... The funny thing is, God did leave it all up to me. I could have chosen to reject it all, but I didn't. something in me made me accept that people cared, that God cared.

there really are no magic words to comfort someone when they are down Jack, but to say we love you and care about you and are here for you. Don't reject that tie, whatever you do. Even if you go away and come back in 6 months, and find that most of us are gone or things are different, you have our emails. Use them.


lots of ((((((((((love))))))))))))
rammie

Answer 9

Hey buddy, religious faith is hollow. Rituals don't do anything. Faith in Jesus does help. It's not the short term stuff that is the real issue with my Master and Friend Jesus, it's the long term healing, protection, provision and love that impact every bit of my being.

He has a plan for you Jack. He hasn't forgotten about you, and you are special to Him.

Dust off your Bible (if you haven't already) and read one that impacted my life in times of spiritual need - never-mind, I'll just attach it here:

Jeremiah 29:11-14 - 'For I know well the plans I have in mind for you, says the LORD, plans for your welfare, not for woe! plans to give you a future full of hope. When you call me, when you go to pray to me, I will listen to you. When you look for me, you will find me. Yes, when you seek me with all your heart, you will find me with you, says the LORD, and I will change your lot; I will gather you together from all the nations and all the places to which I have banished you, says the LORD, and bring you back to the place from which I have exiled you.'

Answer 10

Yes,for me it was the only thing that sustained me,when my wife left me...I had plenty of family and supportive friends at the time.but strangely just wanted to be alone..The pain will eventually subside and you will view things in a different light,but the confusion and fear that you experiencing now,is very difficult to deal with...even with the support of those who love you...You certainly have our prayers and friendship,on R&S,however...Don't give up Jack...God knows exactly what You are going though,every tiny detail of your life,is important to him..he is faithful,even when we are not...Knowing Jesus,as SAVIOR and FRIEND is the only reason that I am alive today...It's not make-believe,it's a very real relationship,with the creator of the universe and can only be understood,by personal experience. I am not a stupid man,by any means and would not have patterened my life,all of these years after some fairytale story about a bronze age myth,that had no merit....Jack,I really love you,as a person..and want to be there for you,as many others of my brothers and sisters,who care for you...You know that we are genuine in our walk and concern for you...

By the way,I received the invitation for the voice communication thing...will set it up....

Your buddy,Bobby

Answer 11

I'm too young to know,and in any event became an agnostic at 18. However, many believers attest to the healing power of faith,whatever their religion might be. I suspect that what really takes place is a good measure of support from clergy and fellow members of their congregation. In that materialist sense they are correct,but as to any spiritual solace,that is unprovable.