need advice on disrespectful disobedient teenage boys that fight and argue with stepdad run off school campus?

Question

my two boys(15 &13 ) just started back to school for the yr and for 2 days in a row now have run off school campus and away from authorities who try to detain them. They are both on juvi probation and do NOT seem to give a rats *** about getting into trouble.I feel I've done everything I can to make them see thier wrongs (and rights) but to no avail. I feel there is trouble coming my way because the "system" wont do anything to help. Not only do I feel like I have failed them but the judicial system has to, what solutions can you offer me so that I can help my boys see where thier lives are headed?

I was brought up by great parents and followed my parents roll. I have spanked them ,taken all thier gaming systems,grounded them ,called the cops and had them arrested, heck the 13 yr old is in jail now for leaving campus today.nothing works...Nothing scares them.I have even tried just loving them its never enough for them.

Answer 1

did you ever think they could be smoking pot or dong drugs and that is why they are like they are. yes, they could no matter how hard you think you have been watching them. i would put them into something very hard drug rehab and a few other places or military school it should help dpeening on how bad off they are. its worth a try i now i had one boy and found it was drugs and i did get him off but took long time.

Answer 2

Here is what my mom did: when I became too incorrigible, she took me, late one night, to Juvenile Hall, and tried to drop me off. That was about all it took to scare me straight. Another friend of mine, back when he was the age of your kids, was picked up by the cops for some minor infraction. They took him down to the station and put him behind bars, then called his folks. His dad was a school principal, and a disciplinarian, and told the cops to keep him there overnight, that he would come and get him in the morning. That night in jail scared my friend straight.
So, make sure that your two kids get picked up by the cops, and shown EXACTLY where they will end up if they keep up the bad attitude. Let them spend a night in jail. It usually does the trick.
Because, that's where they're headed anyway, unless something strong and drastic is done right now to nip it in the bud.
EDIT - You might seriously consider enrolling them in a tough military school that specializes in cases like yours. Really, if the one is already in jail, and he's still not showing the needed discipline, it's time to ship them both off to military school. If they can get straightened out there, maybe the real military might be the best place for them.

Answer 3

Take every last luxury out of their rooms except for their bed. Take away video games, tv etc. If you don't start using tough love now, there is no hope. What a luxurious life to be supported and do whatever you want. You are going to have to take drastic measures, because at their age it is almost getting too late. Let them break probation and quit protecting them from any punishment, because there's a chance punishment (jail) could help them now...sure wouldn't hurt.

Answer 4

Sounds like they should have been spanked years ago. You can't leave it up to the system to do anything to help. They are not the reason your boys act like that. A child's behavior is a reflection of their parents' parenting ability.

Answer 5

I was going to write a solution, but I think there is none. Try to save your marriage and don't let their stepdad take any responsibiilty for the boys actions. He is there to be with you and not father them. Its your job to find a solution and sorry to say, the boys are a product of your upbringing. You have to change first and become a leader before they will listen to anything you have to say. I'm sorry to say this, but I think you are at fault, not them.

Answer 6

They need a spanking, don't they.

Answer 7

scared straight.