Some people seem to put on an act to win someone's heart, and they just be so bad after they got what they wanted. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, how long would you wait to understand more about him/her before you get married?
2007-08-23 17:43:04 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It is seen that way. But in truth, it is not that people hide their personalities just to win somebody's heart.
What happens is that when people get married and live together, they learn of nuances that they never noticed before, even if the person was not hiding it. Remember that living with someone, sleeping with this person every night will necessarily show you the person inside out. Unfortunately, sometimes the little things we find out (that, I repeat, the person did not hide in the first place) get to bother us at some point.
What is important is that we should learn to accept people, and adjust. We can not change the people we married, and the adjustment should be both ways.
2007-08-23 17:52:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
No one can fully understand another person in such a short time before marriage. Understanding needs a lifetime. Time change and the expectation change too. Marriage is like a gamble. Usually before marriage, one will try to put on his/her best front and do things to impress. After marriage, one tend to relax and take in the comfort that the situation will not change too easily. Certain things are taken for granted, as one is already in a comfort zone so to speak.
2007-08-24 01:14:59 · answer #2 · answered by May M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I can tell you that if you spend enough time with someone you will see their true good and bad sides. For example my fiance' and I have been together for 10 years. We have a house together and we are getting married next year. Being with him this long I know what to expect and how he will react to certain things. After awhile you really get to know what makes the other person & who they are. I'm not saying you have to be with someone for 10 years or move in with them to get to know their personality, but living with someone for even a short time, can tell you alot about them. Are they a slob, do they pay their bills, or are they lazy, how they react to certain situations. I can honestly say time reveils all. If this person truly cares for you, he will be with you through thick and thin. Best of luck!!!
2007-09-01 00:10:54 · answer #3 · answered by Dee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely!!!! While it may not be Biblical, you should spend enough time where you feel like you are living with them or you do live with them for a period of time. I "dated" my wife for 3 years before we married and we still have our problems. But at least we knew what we knew about each other and things didn't change too much after we got the piece of paper.
2007-08-24 00:48:53 · answer #4 · answered by baseballdad69 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do believe people change after marriage. I know first hand...because I changed. Ask my husband if when we dated I was as crazy as I am now, and he would say no. I was sweet and charming and then BAM total pain in the butt. Well, not all the time. But I can say that marriage can be stressful and if you had a pretty stress free courtship, you may see somethings after marriage you didn't know were there.
2007-08-24 00:48:23 · answer #5 · answered by Nikke 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move on together first to see if marriage is really what you want and to get use to seeing his bad habits and rather you can live with them or not so many people rush into marriage with not seeing the real mate.
2007-09-01 00:30:25 · answer #6 · answered by twinkle2twinkle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it depends sometimes it shows right away or sometimes it shows later in life. you just don't know. i knew this one girl and she was nuts and i didn't see it for long time it was nearly 4 year sand then my son got it and left it can take forever you have to talk and figure things out and then either go or stay
2007-08-30 22:02:58 · answer #7 · answered by Tsunami 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Live together for a while first , at least a year or more. This will give you your answer.
2007-08-24 00:48:10 · answer #8 · answered by I tell it like it is 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
only if they are not who they say they are...i mean, did you look on their drivers license to make sure you married the right person?
2007-08-24 00:47:35 · answer #9 · answered by bubba gumps light 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i would all ways try to find some one who would be my friend befor my boyfriend.
2007-08-31 23:52:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋