Christians: Can Prov 22:15 be interpreted any other way than being commanded to spank your children?

Question

I was saved not even one month ago (praise God!). I am so excited about learning and striving to live and display a Christian life. I am enthusiastically reading many parts of the bible, and have been studying "Love & Respect" by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs which has just been a miracle for my no-longer-failing marriage.

Next to those books I have read, am re-reading, and trying to understand, "Shepherding a Child's Heart" which teaches you in a biblical way how to raise your children emphasizing on how to deal correctly when your child sins. I love, embrace, and understand that I am not to act out in anger when punishing my 2 yr old daughter but to love her and hold her even tighter when her heart has strayed. The thing I just can't grasp is spanking my child. It breaks my heart to even think about it.

Do I just need to have faith and do it because I am commanded to... will this bring comfort and confidence that I am doing the right thing?

Answer 1

"The rod of discipline" does not mean taking a stick and beating a child with it. This discipline could be a gentle rebuke or sending your kids to the room, asking them to apologize for hitting another child, or maybe spanking them. Discipline should be done to help the child learn between right and wrong, mistakes, etc., but it should not done out of abuse or to take out your anger on them. Hope this helps!

"Young children often do foolish and dangerous things simply because they don't understand the consequences. Wisdom and common sense are not transferred by just being a good example. The wisdom a child learns must be taught consciously. "The rod of discipline" stands for all forms of discipline or training. Just as God trains and corrects us to make us better, so parents must discipline their children to make them learn the difference between right or worng. God corrects us, read 3:11, 12) Life Study Application Study Bible

Answer 2

Well, do not let your heart break! If you fail to discipline her now while she is young, she will really break your heart when she is a teenager or younger! Most of the time with some kids they do not need spankings. There are those times that they really do.

She should not need anything like that yet, she is only two! But one day she will defy you and test your authority!(All kids do) You will need to set firm rules and when she crosses over the line make sure she does not violate them again! I am not saying to beat her without mercy. I am saying a few well deserved swats on the backside will spare her and you much pain and sorrow later on.Example: Crossing the street without permission when they are 5(my boys did this)! You know and I know that this can mean death from a passing auto. There needs to be a way to impress on her mind how serious this matter is! Another example: Putting her hands on a hot stove. If she insists on this she can be burned really bad. Playing with matches,we all have heard stories of how kids burn down houses with people in them from playing with matches! These issues need to be addressed.

One must never hit out of anger but out of your love and concern for the child's well being. My little granny switched my bottom all the time, I did not die. I grew up knowing that there were a set of rules that I did not dare break. I knew there were consequences for breaking rules. She also instilled in us a love for God. A sense of fairness and a desire to please the Lord!
Pray over this, the Lord will direct you!

Answer 3

I think I understand where you are coming from... I just have some questions that I reflect upon when this comes up... They may be relevant, or not...

You are commanded to HIT your child? You can say that it will be performed in a loving manner, but will the child understand this? Won't all she feel is her mother's hand on her backside?

This could also lead to the child being more violent also. Since her mother hits her, she is setting an example. If mom and/or dad does it, it must be ok for me to do it - hit maybe other playmates, etc.

But this is where I can see the problem. Maybe there's difference between spanking in what you feel is a faithful way, and spanking in an ignorant way. If you take the time to explain to your child what and why she is being punished in this manner, she will most probably understand, and there will be no negative side effects - however, if you simply hit your child for bad behavior, what else can you expect than more bad behavior?

So, if you are taking the time to explain to your daughter why you are spanking her, why not just explain to her why her behavior was unacceptable in the first place, and what kind of good behavior you expect out of her instead - and don't spank?

And follow your heart. God forgives, does he not? What hurts you to even think about, will be hurting your child.

hehe. funny thought- so I bet most people have heard adults say to children who are learning to speak "use your words!!" It's kind of like that - if you use your words, (and maybe the loss of a few select privileges), your child will understand, instead of using your hands.

Answer 4

Welcome!! It's so good to hear of your recent new birth in the Lord! He is so good! Scripture and popular culture differ on many areas this one in paticular. I was spanked as a child but always in a spirit of love. My parents' never spanked me in anger or with condemnation and I think that is the key. Proverbs has some good things to say about disciplining with the rod. I'd suggest you also check out some books by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend, specifically "Boundaries with kids" and "Raising Great Kids" -

http://store.cloudtownsendstore.com/books.html

May the Lord Bless you and your family!!

Answer 5

The Bible associates such discipline, or instruction, with love. (Proverbs 13:24) Therefore, “the rod of discipline” should never be abusive, emotionally or physically.

In Bible times, the Hebrew word for “rod” meant a stick or a staff, such as the one a shepherd used to guide his sheep. (Psalm 23:4) Similarly, “the rod” of parental authority suggests loving guidance, not harsh or brutal punishment.

Still, the Bible does mention “the rod” of discipline. How is this to be understood?

The word “rod” is translated from the Hebrew word she′vet. To the Hebrews, she′vet meant a stick or a staff, such as that used by a shepherd. In this context the rod of authority suggests loving guidance, not harsh brutality.

She′vet is often used symbolically in the Bible, representing authority. When referring to parental authority, “the rod” does not refer exclusively to physical punishment. It encompasses all forms of discipline, which most often need not be physical. And when physical discipline is employed, it is usually because other methods have proved unsuccessful.

Discipline should not leave a child feeling abandoned. Rather, the child should sense that the parent is ‘with him’ as a loving, supportive encouragement. If physical discipline is deemed necessary, the child should understand why. Proverbs 29:15 says that “the rod and reproof are what give wisdom.”

It is a sad fact that today many use “the rod” of parental authority abusively. Yet, fault cannot be found with the Bible’s balanced principles. When we consider “the rod” in its context, we see that it serves to teach children, not to abuse them. As in other matters, the Bible proves to be “beneficial for teaching, for reproving, for setting things straight, for disciplining in righteousness.”

Answer 6

So wonderful that you gave your heart to the Lord. Welcome, dear sister!
Corporal punishment- The Bible says Spare the rod- spoil the child I think that's what Prov 22:15 means . Never a beating.
Two rules- no three- 1- never when you are angry
2 not more than two taps in the sit upon
I used it rarely. When my children were both difiant and in harm's way
3- Corporal punishment must be administered immediately

Answer 7

It depends on the child..I was able to raise my last child with almost no spanking...I think I spanked him once, and that was when I felt that his life was in danger...it was over running in front of a car.

I am coming to a realization that spanking may be a rare need is needed at all....children will push you to your last limit. whatever that is. will be where they take you...be sure that if yo do need to give a swat, that you are calm, and are in the right frame of mind.

i would encourage you to pray over this, only you can know for sure...god bless you for being a good and competent parent.

Answer 8

Discipline

Answer 9

Praise God for your salvation.If you look at how spanking has gradually diminished over the years.Then look at how the behavior of our nations children has gotten worse year after year.The "experts" claim that spanking children teaches them aggression. Well our children have never been more aggressive.As you continue to study scripture you will begin to see that loving chastisement is love.There is no greater love than the love that God has for you and he will chastening you in a heartbeat.

Answer 10

It is about discipline. There is a reason that God made our backsides the meatiest part of the anatomy! Just a few quick whaps with the yardstick will get their attention. Then all you will have to do in the future will be to just show them that stick and you will have instant obedience! I has worked for generations in our family. It is a good thing that you have a slight fear about hurting them, this will keep you from wailing on them. Discipline them now, and they won't be unruly later on! Praise God!