Spare the rod, spoil the child?

Question

Well, I don't mean it literally, but how many here agree with a few good old fashioned spanks to discipline a child?

Answer 1

It worked on me

Answer 2

I believe that good old fashion spankings should be a last resort meaning that all other avenues of discipline have been exhausted. I was raised with good old fashion whippings and I have to say it only taught me that hitting solves problems and adults are not always right. I really don't understand how you can teach a child to not hit when they have learned from the parents that hitting is acceptable. Mixed signals is what spankings send because most spankings are done out of anger. I neither agree or disagree with spankings because I have young children and I don't know if I will ever have to resort to such measures. I am thankful at this point that talking and taking things away still work. To each his/her own.

Answer 3

Well, I was "spanked" as a child and I turned out just fine.. However, I was never really a "problem" child to begin with so discpline was never an issue... However, I have two younger siblings that were/are horrible and much of it was due to discipline issues... My brother was was spanked, grounded the whole nine yards and he's just terrible.. Even worse he's a terrible young adult. It seemed that there were two schools of thought with my parents.. All or nothing punishment or give in to him.. My step father was an army drill instructor and doled out the punishments and my mother would have to "maintain" punishment while he was at work.. Grounding from tv, computer, games... etc... If the punishment wasn't carried out or " mouthing" off was concerned there was the "beating"... So, my mother would play softee while my step-dad was at work letting my brother do as he please and be a brat and get what he wants or he would throw a tantrum.... Hence a beating when "dad" came home... This approach has caused him to throw tantrums as an adult to get what he wants.. Hes 21... He's not afraid of anything and has even hit a police officer.... So, while I agree in a spanking here and there for serious things it's best if it's NOT an overused means of punishment...

Answer 4

Deffinately. Never done out of anger or applied in excess but there is deffinately a time and a place for this type of discipline.
I also believe that many parents in the past and now don't use it as it should be used. I believe that many parents use it as a last resort when they are already mad, angry and upset. This then is spanking out of anger and trying to make yourself feel better as a parent. This then relays the wrong message to the child. This tells the child that even more than not doing that particular thing anymore this tells the child that if mommy or daddy is mad I'm gonna get it.
Spanking does need to be used as an effective tool, not a last resort. As a teaching method. So that the child will actually learn that they can't do that particular thing anymore that it is unacceptable!
An effective way to bring this about is to get on the childs level, get on your knees so you can look them in the eye. Tell them that what they have done is not o.k. and mommy/daddy will have to spank them. Spank and then hold them. Telling them that you love them.
This cannot be carried out like this if the mom or dad is angry. So a good rule of thumb to help keep the parents attitude in check.

Answer 5

In the right situations, a good old fashioned spanking is appropriate. Just be darned carefull that the child knows exactly why it's being done.

Never do it in public! There will always be some jerk who only sees the spanking and not the "why". They're always ready to rip into you, judge you, and maybe even report you to protective services.

Had that happen in public places a couple times. The kids were out of control and in each case were doing something that could really get them hurt. Each time there was some jackass self important do-gooder there to verbally condemn me in front of the world. I'm absolutely certain that they only saw the punishment and not the cause.

At the time I was a single parent. Having those kids taken away from me and sent to their mom would have been a disaster for the kids future, having them sent to foster homes would have had the same result.

Now they're older, and haven't received spankings in ages. They now understand groundings, loss of priveleges, and loss of cash.

Answer 6

Any time you correct a childs behavior you need to let them know why that behavior was wrong. Too many parents use corporal punishment without in depth explaination. The result is a child who behave only around the parent. Also spanking should never be done when you are enraged. You will probably find that time outs, withdrawl of privillages and a single spank on the butt as a reminder that you are watching once in a while will serve as enough dicipline. Remember children who are never exposed to vioence, never consider it as an option. Wouldn't that be a nice world to live in?

Answer 7

If its necessary to shock a child, like for running into the street, one spank on the fanny is understandable.
For any other less than life threatening reason all you are doing is showing the child that its alright to respond by hitting. What your child sees you do is far more powerful than what you tell him.
I just figured long ago that if some giant hit me I wouldn't take his/her power over me kindly, when I became a babysitter and later a parent and grandparent, I found that most kids can be spoken to, and even reasoned with, if you use a firm enough tone of voice. Start young and don't let them get away with anything, and hitting isn't necessary. It just says you can't deal with them without resorting to violence, and if its good enough for mom and dad, its good enough for them.

Its funny to think that so many here say they were spanked and they spank and its no big deal. If its no big deal why do it? If you have to keep on spanking time and time again, doesn't that show that as a disciplinary measure its pretty useless?
As for calculatedly spanking a child or ritualistically putting them over your knee. Am I the only one who finds that far more unsettling than the immediate swat on the backside when the child has done wrong?

Answer 8

Because I believe what the bible tells me, I think that true discipline needs to include a spanking every once in a while. I feel that if you spank a child hard enough to leave a mark, welt, or bruise it is too hard. I think that if a parent remains CONSISTANT with discipline (time out), that the need for spankings will greatly diminish. MOST IMPORANT... if you say "no"... then that means NO, if you say "if you do that again you're in trouble", then if it happens again... punishment needs to come into play. This shows them that you have authority, and they will listen to you. I also know that each child is different. A child that has a stronger, or more rebellious personality (naturally), they will have a more difficult time submitting to your authority, but eventually they will as long as we as parents stay strong and stick to our "word"!

Answer 9

Literally and not literally yes children need discipline, I don't live in USA so spaking isn't against the law and yes when my son does nonsense he would either get spanked or punished itnis to teach him that when he does wrong he willhave to suffer consequenses. On the other hand when he does something nice i would give him a reward e.g. A hug or kiss a nice word and occasionally a toy or treat. Youhave to let children know what are morals and behavioral reinforecement. I think they need both negative and positive reinforcement. I hope this was helpful.

Answer 10

Spanking is acceptable only under controlled conditions.
1. Never spank a child because YOU are angry.
2. Make sure the child knows why they are being spanked.
3. A couple open handed slaps on their butt is sufficient to make your point.
4. The threat of a spanking is usually just as effective as actually doing it.
5. If you are doing it right, it really will hurt you as much as it does them. :-)

Answer 11

I do spank my children but only with my hand. usually just a swat to get there attention. I try my best to really make sure they know why I just swatted them as well. My older son has grown out of it but all I have to do is take things away or ground him. It worked on me when I was a kid and I turned out just fine. I see nothing wrong with it. But our government has totally tried to take out parenting rights away due to some parents beating and abusing their kids. Grant it there are some people who never should have had kids at all! I have seen em in the stores and I do say somthing! Maybe I shouldnt but I have seen some literrally beat and degrade their child in my presence and I call em on it!