Im so sorry to even be asking this...But its either ask you people...OR scream at my boss...So in the spirit of wanting to keep my job....
My boss..who unfortunately (just cos the job sucks!) is also my step dad keeps staring at me ...All the time!! If i call someone he just watches, if I do something on the computer he just stares... I always just catch him staring and I hate it...!!
Lol.. now, its not a pervy stare!! Its just a gormless thing he does, but its driving me crazy! I sometimes just look accross at him and say 'is everything ok' or 'whats wrong?' but he just says 'yeah, fine' my asking is my polite way of telling him to stop it!!
I told my mum and she just laughed, she says its his habit!! Which is fine if you're married to him and see it as a quirk..But I just see it as really irritating..
Hes a nice guy and I dont want to offend..But can anyone suggest anything that I could say...??
Im sorry to sound like im ranting.... I guess I am....
xxx
2007-08-23 02:33:43 · 26 answers · asked by KB 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
I just wanna say...
He really doesnt think im steeling from him... Its not even possible... Im just a data entry clerk...
2007-08-23 02:48:30 · update #1
This is for 'Oh do be quiet, youth of today!'s'
YES I DID GO TO UNIVERSITY... I HAVE HAD CANCER FOR THREE YEARS AND FUNNILY ENOUGH I CANT GET A JOB WITH A SICKNESS RECORD OF THAT LONG. I HAVE A LIFE AND FIND YOU'RE OVER LONG POINTLESS ANSWER RUDE.;
2007-08-23 21:13:36 · update #2
Have you tried to talk to him.......tell him that if he stare at you you feel that you are being tested all the time and this make you feel that you are doing something wrong all the time especially at work....
He sound like a reasonable guy and from what you describe he sound like it is his habit more than anything.....and if he is a nice guy then he should be willing and open to you telling him about your discomfort....you can say that it is like this the more someone look the more i cannot do work comfortably....tell him you are not the type of person that perform well or even perform at all when you feel or someone is looking at you.....it should be fine with him and the way you talk will not be disrespectful.
2007-08-23 02:43:32 · answer #1 · answered by soundfamiliar 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
D/KRISTY
Though it is ranting is interesting though. Ok if u serious about this post-- how young are you?? I guess since u said u working must be definitely more than 18. u not only mentioned ur step dad but also ur boss. All I can say is you are being welcomed into the life of men. Your blossoming is being taken notice. To keep the job and the fun going-- let the boss look or stare at you and continue to do what makes him stare-- it will die down once the vanity wears out. Well at home - since it is step dad-- he being lecherous cannot be ruled out and it might be gormless as u say-- no need for u to say anything to stop him from starring--simple will be to avoid being seen in his presence especially when u are alone with him.
2007-08-23 02:50:17 · answer #2 · answered by TROUBLESHOOTERKILLROY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is your boss at work, then his job is to make sure that you are properly doing your assigned tasks. He may want to see exactly how you are performing.
However...this can be an uncomfortable situation for anyone. If it were me, I would pull him aside and say,"Look. I'm already nervous about being your step-daughter and working in the same place. I don't know if you realize it or not, but staring at me while I'm working makes me REALLY nervous and edgy. It makes me feel like you don't trust me. Could you maybe...just take it down a notch? Please.."
If he gets defensive, then quit. Period. I wouldn't work for a boss that didn't care if I was uncomfortable. It's just not worth the stress, unless you are making a TON of money.
2007-08-23 02:46:08 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry but staring is rude...and always go by your feelings. If it brings you discomfort, then it really is. It's the little things like this in life that cause us to waste so much time wasting our breath and worrying for nothing. I've had this problem with a professor once and I had to leave the school. I'm in another school but I'm happier because the situation was bringing me too much discomfort. I realize people have their idiosyncracies and their habits but staring is a form of psychological harassment and disrespect. If you can change jobs, if you can't approach him about it and if he still refuses, DO leave your job. Discomfort is a horrible thing in life.
2007-08-23 02:57:20 · answer #4 · answered by arielena_123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is that he is a man, and men are more likely to stare at any women more than vice versa.
Your step relationship means that he he is probably tantalised because you are not actually his daughter, in which case he would not do such a thing.
In the interests of your well-being and also family peace, I think you should find another job as soon as possible.
2007-08-23 04:37:50 · answer #5 · answered by Canute 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Buy a pair of joke goggle-eye glasses. Everytime he stares at you, put them on and nod your head at him. They will look ridiculous and will brreak his stare. Hopefully he will laugh. After the fith time in one day....he might say the jjoke is not funny, and you can say, 'you're right, but it is not funny when you stare at me all the time either'.
Just keep it up. It is harmless and not rude (unlike your step father's stare). If this ignites a discussion in the family, you can point out to everyone that his 'quirk' is actually really creepy and unsocialble and you will keep reminding him of this (using the galsses as a silly but useful tool) until he stops.
I bet you this works.
2007-08-24 23:27:27 · answer #6 · answered by purple nurple 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I tend to stare when I'm thinking, I do it at work and people ask me the same things. I'm not actually staring at anything, more just into space so perhaps that's what he's doing too. Can you not move your desk or simply turn around so you're not in his eyeline and then he'll stare at something else!
Failing that then just explain every time you catch him doing it, eventually he'll realise!
2007-08-23 02:40:51 · answer #7 · answered by sunshine 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'd recommed you turn your back at him (if possible) every time he stares. Perhaps then he'll get hint and stop. If as you said is not pervy could be he's just a control freak and not much you can do about it but looking for another job.
2007-08-23 02:47:52 · answer #8 · answered by fed up woman 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He could have a crush on you or think you are cute. Maybe he wants to get to know you and is shy. He could also be doing it to annoy you. He could just want you to stare back. He may want to hug you. He may even want to become your best friend. The only to find out is ask. If he turns away then try to get his attention and if he is so shy he will not respond then just leave it at that. He may want to hug you.
2016-05-20 23:01:45 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh dear! Watch out. He`s using the excuse of you now being an employee to stare lecherously at you on the pretence to see how you are progressing.
I could be wrong but, step-dad? At your age you are vulnerable
2007-08-23 02:41:20 · answer #10 · answered by Montgomery B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋