Christians only Please?

Question

How do you get along with people in the ministry who act hateful towards you?

I cant stop going beacuse i do have to be obedient to my mother.

And when I am nice to the girls they have attitudes.And i hear them talking about I act spirtual and stuck up but the only reason why I dont hang around them because they talk mean about people so I just stay in the sancuary instead of talking on the other side with the youth

thanx very much I feel so much more better

Answer 1

Hey. I know exactly how you feel. Im 16 and have gone to alot of youth groups but I cant find one thats just right. When I went the kids didnt really embrace me but just was like "umm hi"

Then I try to have a conversation with them and they are like " Oh cool, mhhhmmm" and then they go back and talk to their friends. I go Whatever >=/

My suggestion is to keep trying to find another group. If you cant find one thats then stay with the one that you like the most (if you want). Just keep talking to them and have a Christian spirit :)

You can email me with any other questions at: [e-mail]

Answer 2

I know how you feel...It's because of the way the people treat you that you don't want to attend the church service, or youth groups...My son has had the same problem in the past with the youth groups, and the kids don't act very "Christianity"....
It's almost like a big gossip-fest...
My son has gone out of his way to talk to the kids, to be included but they treat him like he's invading their group...
It's so sad, he doesn't go to youth group anymore..We've tried others, but some allow the kids to run wild and there is no "reverence" in the chapel or "obedience" towards their youth instructor....Sometimes I think parents send their ill-behaved children to youth group hoping the church can mend their "evil ways!"....Just like Christian Schools, so many of the kids are unbelievably rude and out of control....
I am happy that you want to honor your Mom and the Lord will bless you for this....I'll tell you the same thing I've told my son...All these kids will one day realize that their behavior will come back to bite them in the "butt"....What goes around, comes around and I know because every time I've been mean to someone, God has seen to it that I get it back 10 fold...Stay Sweet, read the word, and don't worry about the other kids...you won't be lonely forever....someday you will have a family of your own and you will be richly rewarded if you keep the faith!....God Bless You....

Answer 3

Jesus outlined how to deal with conflicts among brothers in the New Testament.

0. Prepare yourself first by praying and studying the Bible. Pray for Jesus guidance and study the topics of hateful behaviour, character of Christ that needs to be developed among us, and forgiviness.
1. Talk to the person alone. Express exactly what hateful behavior you are getting from him/her, and how that is affecting you, also from your study what the Bible says about that. Try to focus on the behaviour not on the person. Be prepared to hear also his/her points, you maybe misunderstood the situation.
2. If the above actions do not solve the situation, talk to other leaders on this. Try to have a meeting with him/her and your "witnesses" to discuss the issue. The leaders should help him/her (or maybe both of you) recognize the errors and reconciliate. Sometimes more than one meeting are required.
3. If the step 2 fail, make it public to the church.

Keep in mind the aim of the whole process is to obtain repent from the sinful behaviour and give / receive forgiveness.

God bless you.

Answer 4

Those people odiously are not acting very much like a Christian should. You might want to tell your mom your thoughts and feelings towards this. It sounds like the situation couldn't get much worse so you might think about having your church leaders step in on your behalf or your youth leader. This might be the best answer. I can relate though I am an adult this kind of thing is not limited to youths. Its unfortunate because this is one reason that non-believers use to bash the church. Good Luck and God Bless!!

Answer 5

Ever circumstance and person is different so there is no "one answer fits all" to your question. Definitely prayer is a part of the answer though. For instance you pray for the Lord to give you the grace to deal with difficult people and to realize that your worth comes from God and not from what other people say or do. You can also pray for the Lord to be at work in their lives making them more like Jesus and to convict them of any wrong attitudes they may have.

If a particular person is treating you badly in a way where it is clear that they are sinning against you then Jesus gave the procedure for dealing with situations like that.

Matthew 18:15 "If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

You don't go around gossiping about the person who has wronged you. Instead you find a suitable time when you can talk to them one on one and you explain to them what they have done that has hurt you. You have to prepare your self with the right attitude where your goal is to lovingly get the other person to see that they are behaving in a way contrary to how the Lord says that they should behave. If you are filled with anger and just want to "beat up on them" with your words then you don't have the right attitude.

It doesn't mean that you can't be angry, but as the Bible says "be angry and sin not". Keep your focus on the specific behavior with a hope of being reconciled. The way you describe the situation it sounds like you have to work with people who are either "baby Christians" or people who have never been born again and so they are still worldly. You might want to be praying for the Lord to draw them to Christ and give them the gift of faith and the Holy Spirit.

Answer 6

The ministry has to be a light unto the world, If a minister is not meeting the qualification of the bible, then they are not a minister. Hatefulness is not a good example of a minister, but Yes a True minister can have the authority to rebuke a situation, but his rebuke can not go beyond of what the bible says a minister should handle a situation. Make sure your own actions is not causing a rebuke,

Answer 7

You know what? You are in that ministry because of God not men so whatever they says about you doesn't matter, they might be jealous of your God's given gift which you might not know. Just do your things as you were directed by the Holyspirit and don't let anything takes you from the presence of God. God has his own reason for taking you to that ministry.

Answer 8

Usually there are one or two youngsters in this church/congregation or in the neighbor one that can become your buddy/ies. So why should you have to accept hateful behavior? Why would you want to be friends with fiends?

Otherwise, join a sports/chess/book club where people are engaged in the sport for its sake not so much for the sake of impressing the ruffians that make life hard on the righteous young.

Look at Jesus' example. When he went to his hometown to preach, did all his 'friends' from childhood come and make him feel welcome, or did they try to kill him?

Jesus made friends with people who had the same goals that he had.

Answer 9

Here are the major things I try to do with anyone who is hard to get along with. They are in no particular order.

1) Try to understand them. Someone once told me "love sees faults as needs" In other words, one of the things I do is try to see their hatefullness as coming from an unmet need they have -- for example, are they insecure and fearful so they must be insulting? are they preoccupied because of the anxiety they are experiencing so they seem like they are ignoring me? do they come from a family where "acting hateful" is the norm so that they really don't know any better.

2) Refuse to return evil for evil. I will not let their bad attitude determine my attitude. I continue to treat them with love and respect. Jesus tells us to do this and to do otherwise, simply diminishes me

3) Pray for them. It may sound trite but it is amazing how God can work. Sometimes I have found he has changed thier attitude. Other times I have found that he has given me the strength, insight or wisdom to cope.

4) Talk to them about it. Jesus tells us that "if our brother has something against us" we should go to him. Not our friends or others . . . go to them. Then he says if that doesn't work we should get someone else to go with us

5) Excerise wisdom to care for myself. No one should abuse me and I am responsible for good stewardship of myself. Sometimes this means going away, even staying away. Forgivness is not the same as allowing a person to continue to abuse another - even ourselves.

Answer 10

It should not be for your mother. Religion is for your self. If people are being rude to you just ignore them. I know it sounds hard but I had to do it. I was always treated rudely. Sorry but you can't change them just stay who you are and find someone who accepts you for that. That is who you should worry about not all of the people who are "popular" or what ever. Popularity don't last forever but true friendship does!
God Bless