Would you rather your spouse left you, or died?

Question

There's a saying that you know it's love when: they're late home, you don't know where they are, and you'd rather they were cheating on you than dead in a ditch somewhere. My husband left me for another woman eight months ago. I often find it easier to think of him as dead (and not because I wish him dead). It hurts less. If anyone has been through something personal that's relevant, which would you prefer - that he/she died, or dumped you for another?

Answer 1

Died.
But thats selfish and I know that.
I've never been married but seeing my ex out with another womn in the same small town I live in,
It gets old,a nd it hurts.

Answer 2

Well I understand that your very hurt because who wouldn't be in a situation like this but NO I wouldn't want them to be dead because what is that going to do it still hurts and now it's going to hurt even more because if they're dead wouldn't you be sad if someone you loved died even if they did hurt you. I know that it's easier to deal with if you were thinking he was dead but it does solve all the hurt he did . It's apart of live some people are you going to hurt you even the ones you love just concentrate in your life and on yourself .
Mr. Right is out there somewhere

Hopes this Helps =)

Answer 3

I would rather have him dead.

I have done most of the dumping of relationships in my life and it was never to be with another. It was to stop a charade. Most every guy I attracted were way too clingy and sometimes I just needed to be alone, so,I would have to dump them to do just that.

I recently kept someone in my life thinking it was my last chance to have a mate. That idiot turned out to be a bigamist, a thief and a dead beat dad. I was enduring a relationship with him longer than any other relationship I have ever endured. I would have rather seen him dead than to have been humiliated like that. I rue the day I ever met Kurt Emerson Niebruegge.

Answer 4

Honestly, either way it would hurt, not to think that yes being left for another woman would hurt the most because he has disgraced you but then it is much much worse to lose your partner when they die for any reason. It would be like losing a piece of you that was ripped away from you and then you couldn't live with yourself and wonder why your soulmate died. It would say yes if my husband died for any reason, I would be heart broken, if he cheated, yes it would hurt but I can find someone better who will not cheat and be fully faithful.

Answer 5

well, my first DIED on me, AFTER filing for divorce, running away with my best friend and then delaying, denying and attempting to wring me dry in court for two years.
I wish this story were a soap opera, but it's not.
All I can say about her being dead is..."Your Honor, I can PROVE I was in an airplane at 30,000 feet when she died and there really were lots of reasons for the Akita next door to be barking an hour and a half earlier and no I really didn't drive the Bronco that night and yes there was a frozen Ice Cream on the ground but Marcia Clark had the evidence destroyed and...."

Answer 6

Excellent way of taking things to your heart. I am really surprised to see an answer like this. Very good and keep it up. For unwanted people how long you waste your time and energy . Better to get rid of those people once for all. One more thing I would like to share. One of my friend died in an accident, when his daughter(So affectionate with her father)came to know this news, she refuses to see the body and went away from the house for 0ne month. She told us later that she was convinced herself that her father has gone to some other country and he will be back after the work is over. She also told us that had she seen the body she would not have thought so. Even now she is thinking like that and four years gone. Let God give you full strength to face this problem Yours VRVRAO

Answer 7

I wouldn't wish death on any one.. I would rather go get counseling for my self than to feel the way you do. It hurts really bad when some one you love dumps you, I know but every day gets better. Find some things to occupy your mind so maybe it won't hurt so bad. You will find some one new.. May take some time but time heals all wounds.. Good Luck

Answer 8

I know this sounds horrible but I would rather find out the person is dead due to the fact that I wont feel inadequate or insecure thinking why would a person leave me/ cheat on me and think of my self as not good enough.also if a person is dead, it is easier to move on

Answer 9

I think you must face the fact. I am in your same situation. My lover didn't love me since this year. But i always think he will back someday. If not , I also hope he can happy. And I told him about that. I think honest to each other is better than cheat or evade. Maybe you can take a talk with your husband. And then you can make a decision. Hurt yourself is very silly. Nobody can help you except yourself. Please cheer up!

Answer 10

I did not have any of those feelings because I left the lazy guy that wanted to have a mother rather than share family responsibilities as a husband, including not working.

Answer 11

It's easier to deal with it if you think of him as being dead; I agree. My husband left me after over 28 years together. I can feel your pain.

I would prefer him leaving me and think of him as being dead (even though he left me for someone else).

When you love someone, even if he hurts you, you wish him well. Hold no grudges in your heart, you will live longer and happier.