My friends are having an affair. What shld I do?

Question

I had long suspected that they are having an affair.

This guy friend of mine admitted that he's having an affair with this colleague in my dept when I jokingly asked him about it.

He's a father to 3 sons, she's a gorgeous smart lady. Ever since I knew of their affair, they counted me in for some of their gathering & we got very close now.

They care for each other. My female colleague is very understanding, always sparing a thought for his wife & sons. He's very loving towards my colleague too.

I am aware that, in actual fact, they are very miserable. Each of them once asked me if they shld split since there's going to be no outcome (w/o the presence of the other party).

Shld I just stay away from their mess or should I be advise them to split?? I am not trying to be nosey but they are deeply in love but can't be together just because they met too late, I just hope that I can help to end their misery.

Answer 1

stay away and do not say anything...if they make a decision on what you say you will be to blame for everything that happens. Just advice them both to be honest with the other and tell them how they feel.

Answer 2

staying in any affair can only be missy because they cannot be together. There the holiday, valentine, new year, etc where they can't share, if one person is sick they cannot go to the other person.
you get the idea.
the idea is to help them understand and break up for a while. see how can tehy live without the person. if they are real in love, then they need to think about how to be together. meaning the guy has to divorce.

Answer 3

Stay out of it. The reason is simple. No matter what you tell them, you are going to be made into the bad guy no matter what. Lets say that you told them to stay together. Then they're spouses find out...Your a bad guy. If you tell them to split. Then one or both of they're marriages don't work out...Your a bad guy. Just stay clear of the situation and save future problems.

Answer 4

These are two dishonest people. The man has disgraced himself by committing adultery in the workplace. The woman is nothing more than a whore, knowing this man is married yet pursuing him anyway. She has no self respect and no sense of decency. Whether or not this man and his wife are getting along is none of your female colleague's business. Neither does it give her the right to sneak around with another woman's husband. There is nothing to admire about these two people. Absolutely nothing. And if you think their affair is something to brag about, I feel sorry for you.

Answer 5

I'm not in the business of cleaning up my friends mess, are you? I would stay away form the situation, if his wife finds out you knew her hubby was straying and you didn't tell her, what would that do to your relationship with them? It isn't your job to manage your friends extramarital affairs.

Answer 6

If I were you I would stay out of it. They will come to a conclusion and act on it soon. She will eventually grow tired of being last on his list. He will not leave his wife and kids. They will figure it out. She may seek new employment just to stay away from him.

Answer 7

Now you have learned a valuable lesson--never let yourself get involved with someone Else's dirty work. Don't advise them at all. They got into this without you, then can get out without you.

Answer 8

Stay out of it. Not something that you need to or should be involved in. If things between them don't work, it could come back to be your fault that they left their spouses.

Answer 9

You can't help them. They got themselves into this , they need to solve their own problems. Eventually you'll be asked to take sides. Get out now, your involvment will only lead to bad things.

Answer 10

Stay out of it. It's none of your business