I have a boyfriend whom I have now dated for 2yrs. Last year around the Christmas holidays he cheated on me with his ex-girlfriend ( while I was sick in bed). By some miraculous miracle , I took him back ( don't ask me why). Things are ok now but I am working on gaining his trust back. He has really tried to be honest and more open with me. However, I am now overly paranoid and still insecure about the whole issue. Its driving me insane. It seems almost impossible for me to be happy again...
How do I deal with this if I want this relationship to work?
What are some things he or I can do to work through this?
Should I break up with him? How?
Thanks so much for the help.
2007-08-21 18:12:13 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You took him back!??!??! Ah, well I won't harp.
I think that you should break up with him, because you seem to have lost all trust in your relationship. Tell him so, remind him what he put you through. Good Luck! Find somebody who deserves you.
2007-08-21 18:22:20 · answer #1 · answered by Yalerower 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he were your husband, I would say go to counseling and try to work things out.
since he only has boyfriend status, and you are unhappy, I say drop him!
you can be happy again--with someone else--or jsut with yourself for a while.
You deserve to have an honest faithful partner!
I don't know how old you are, but two years is a long time to date with out talk of marriage--unless you are kids.
Probably if he cheats on you and you are a girl friend, he'll cheat on you when you are a wife. At least you know before kids, and finances are involved. That really complicates things/
2007-08-22 01:23:49 · answer #2 · answered by shoptheflower 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
2 yrs. is a long time to date someone and not give them a second chance. Does he seem like he's trying to make it up to you? Does he answer the phone when you call him when you know he's available to? Does he bring you around his friends alot (girl and guy friends)? and you said you are working on gaining his trust back?? Why would he have any reason not to trust you? If you are unhappy when you are with him maybe you should try to take a break and see what makes you happier...being with him or being without him...
2007-08-22 01:21:23 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
here is the deal
once trust is broken its nearly impossible to gain back
now im a paranoid person regardless of what they have or have not done so im in no shape to date but im great for giving advice just not taking my own
if you dont trust him, you dont trust him
your heart might break at the thought of leaving him but the truth is you have to do right by yourself right now
and if he loved you and that 2 yrs meant anything to him he would not have done it in the first place. period.
so cut your losses. cry till your face is swollen and call it a day. cause there is no way you can force yourself to trust him when hes broken ur heart once already.
2007-08-22 01:20:05 · answer #4 · answered by drlstephe 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will never get this out of your head...What you need to do if you want to stay with him is not dwell on what was done to you, but think about how things are now.
I personally dont give second chances, but i say something prior to getting into a relationship, i tell them i have zero tolerance to this and would expect them to be the same way if i cheated on them....
2007-08-22 01:30:57 · answer #5 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is fine to take him back and stay with him, if you feel like you can get to a point where you can trust him again. but if you dont ever see that happening then just get out now, because a relationship is nothing without trust.
2007-08-22 01:17:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sure, you can forgive but its hard to forget, and you'll always think of getting even, especially if you frequently encounter other attractive guys. It's worth a shot if you love him, but even so, I've been there done that and it leads to more problems. In my opinion it ain't worth it.
2007-08-22 01:21:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh god no not this my friend once got cheated on by this *** and i warned her once a cheater always a cheater she took him bak then after that it happend agein i told her and she trusts me with her life so look just forget bout him i dont like people geting hurt i felt horrible that i could of prevented that so take my advice once a cheatr always a cheater
2007-08-22 01:20:18 · answer #8 · answered by Sam D GO CAROLINA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats one thing i dont think i would ever be able to do is take a girl back that cheated on me, i dunno, if you realy think you can trust him then try to make the relationship work, im just saying if that happened to me it would be over end of story
2007-08-22 01:20:34 · answer #9 · answered by A Guy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! if he really cared about you he wouldnt cheat on you! But then...ask him questions and MAYBE reconsidder
2007-08-22 01:23:56 · answer #10 · answered by hoooplasmeegalrocks 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋