I was raised in a Christian family, and was always taught that sex before marriage was wrong. I messed up along the way, and have had multiple sexual partners -- that being said, i have recently began attending church again, and want to get my life back on the Christian path I'm meant to follow. My boyfriend and I have talked about it, and agreed to abstain from sex until we are married (Yes, we've had sex before...I'm 21 and he's 25). Anyway, how far is too far? I know vaginal intercourse and oral sex are out of the question - but what else? Is it impossible to have any kind of physical touch in our relationship other than kissing? I guess I just dont know where to find these answers or know who to talk to about it -- any thoughts, references in the bible, etc. would be extremely helpful. Thanks!
2007-08-21 08:21:49 · 5 answers · asked by beckyvincenzes 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
First of all -- I'm not a christian, and I don't see anything wrong with safe pre-marital sex. But considering that you disagree with me, I'm going to answer your question on that basis.
Considering that you've had sex in the past, your best bet is to probably refrain from as much physical stuff as possible ... not because its wrong, but because it will be much harder to stick to your guns. The farther you go, the more you'll want to go a little farther, and a little farther ... ESPECIALLY because you both know exactly what you're missing out on.
If you are really serious about waiting, you'd probably better put a halt on the fooling around. Otherwise, you'll most likely end up sleeping together and feeling bad about yourself because of it.
2007-08-21 08:32:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have answered this question before.
There is NOTHING in the Bible about premarital sex, only adultery when one is married. The Church has done a great disservice to the youth of America by trying to demonize premarital sex, when this was standard practice throughout the world in pre-Christian times.
Sexual incompatibility is a HUGE problem in marriages today, and it could all be avoided by having sex with someone BEFORE you enter marriage.
I was am an ordained minister, was a youth minister AND a senior pastor for many years.
You are assuming that it is wrong. What is the definition of marriage? At what point is a couple married? Does society dictate this? If so, it is different in different societies, so which is right? They did not have marriage licenses in Bible times.
ANYTHING that a couple wants to do, as long as they both agree and it does not harm the relationship is acceptable.
2007-08-21 09:01:37 · answer #2 · answered by tempest_twilight2003 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was in the same boat, met my now wife at church and we both have had sex in the past. We both were committed Christians and wanted to be pure SO, we never spent time alone in a bedroom or somewhere that something more could happen. Everything we did physically we would feel comfortable doing in front of our friends and family.
As for scripture you could probably argue to keep your thoughts pure you should not even touch! But I think that is drastic!
I suggest a short engagement and quick marriage. My wife and I were engaged in 4 months and married in 11 months after our first date!
Stay pure and get married soon!
2007-08-22 03:34:06 · answer #3 · answered by me4tennessee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, the bible only really says fornication, so yeah intercourse and oral sex. Practically, it's probably not a good idea to see how close you can get to the edge though. The safest thing would be to stop at kissing or move up the wedding date.
2007-08-21 08:32:53 · answer #4 · answered by Rossonero NorCal SFECU 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you would not do it in public or with another person watching, don't do it at all.
2007-08-21 08:35:19 · answer #5 · answered by Sldgman 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋