Oh no.... boys and puberty! How do I handle it?

Question

I have an 8 yr old daughter...bout to be 9. She is already developing and is getting interested in boys. I don't know how to handle it. She talks to her NaNa more about these kinda things than she does me. We have had brief conversations about boys. I just still wish she would be more open with me and talk to me about her feelings. I know it's hard to talk to mom about boys and how you feel. I went thru it I just don't want her to go thru the same thing and feel she can never talk to me like I felt I couldn't talk to my mother.

Ok maybe everyone is seeing my question wrong. I'm not saying she is boy crazy. No not at all. What I'm meaning to say is that she is developing already and I know within the next few years she will become more interested in boys and this scares me. I mean she is a good girl so for those of you who assume my daughter is wild you got it wrong and I don't appreciate you assuming that of her. She's a straight A student and honor roll. I intend to keep it that way. I'm just scared on how to handle the whole boy crazy thing when she becomes of age. Some of you make it seem like she's fast. Well no. Hate to disappoint you but she isn't. She doesn't even know where babies come from or what sex is.

Answer 1

Man people are either cruel or delarious...8 and 9 year old girls are boy crazy - not SEX CRAZY just boy crazy and most of the time it is just innocent childs play. I am so glad that you are a concerned parent because most are not and for you to even notice and recognize your childs interest speaks volume that you are obviously PAYING ATTENTION and alot of parents dont even bother; and thats why people are pointing the finger at you and saying that you are doing something wrong. Face it. Children today are more sex concious than we were at younger ages because its all around them so I think it is WONDERFUL that you talk to her about boys and whatever else she might be going through. CONTINUE TO DO THAT and she will know that you want to be in her world and that in itself is a rareity these days. Most moms go into this with their eyes wide SHUT and yours are obviously open. Embrace your daughter and let her know that she is a precious jewel and that liking boys is ok as long as thats as far as it goes. That she is too special for anything else to take place. Let her know that you are here for her if she needs to talk about how these boys make her feel and that you were into boys too when you were young and your mom wasnt there for you to talk to and that you want to be there for her. and then BE THERE FOR HER - NO MATTER WHAT. Talking to our children will do more in sex prevention than anything else. KEEP THAT COMMUNICATION OPEN AND GOOD LUCK!

Answer 2

Okay news flash sex is everywhere, your daughter knows about sex, but is probably telling you that she doesn't. No one wants to talk to their parents about sex. Parents and sex should never be in the same sentence is a kids way of thinking! Think back to when you tried talking to your mom about this stuff. She is only 8, and it sounds like you are rushing the boy crazy thing. Let her be a kid and have her puppy love that way when she is older and more interested in boys she can understand the difference between a crush and love. If you want her to open up more to you I suggest that you open up to her, tell her about your first crush. Tell her how awkward you felt being in "love" at her age. Let her know that what she is feeling is normal. Take baby steps in the communication process now so that when she is older you aren't trying to make up for lost time.

Answer 3

If you really don't want your relationship with your daughter to end up like your relationship with your mother, then chances are it's not going to.

Eventually, she'll develop different relationships with different family members, and there's really not a whole lot you can do to control that situation. I know I'm sounding blunt, but hopefully you're finding some relief in my statements as well.

If it makes you feel better, I'm dreading the day my daughter starts being interested in boys!

Good luck!

Answer 4

Uh, its not appropriate for a 9yr old to want to that interested in boys. If she is in what is called precocious puberty you need to take her to a doctor, and make sure its not something triggering puberty. While you need to answer her questions about sexuality in a why that is appropriate for her age, you also need to nip this b/f thing in the bud. Where is she getting this kind of stuff? You need to find out and start being her mother and stop trying to be her friend.

Answer 5

8 years old and boy crazy? Expect your first grandchild in about 3 years. Buck up and be a parent. Quit blaming your past.

Answer 6

I am sure you have things that you prefer to talk about it to some people than others. Even if your daughter prefers to speak to her Nana, at least she is confiding in someone whom you knows. If you force her, she will instead retract and keep to herself or her friends instead of family. I guess it takes time to build trust and comfort level and there are just some things that you do NOT share with your parents. :) Well, i certainly do.

Answer 7

well since you went through this before, try to make her feel confortable. tell her about things that you have experienced about. dont sit and talk to her about it, just ask her here and there about if she finds any guy cute and she'll come out and tell you. act as a friend and not just a mother.

Answer 8

just ask her about her friends and gossip and everything. Im not close to my mom at all and i wish i was. Every once in a while ask her if she has a boyfriend or if her friends do.

Answer 9

Just remind her you are there for her. All the time. And when she is ready, she will come to you. For now, whatever happens, happens. She is going to do what she wants at school. So let it be what it is.

Answer 10

8 and boy crazy?? I will pray for you.