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My son's father and boyfriend of 7 years will not move his stuff out of my house. In the past couple years he has had another child and been in 2 different relationships with 2 girls. He says he still wants to be with me but shows no effort of change. He still has all his stuff at my house and comes everyday to take a shower and then leaves. I told him numerous times that I don't want to do this anymore and that he should take his stuff where he sleeps at night. Everytime I say that, he's nice for a couple days and then I don't see him again. I just want to move on with my life. What should I do?

2007-08-20 07:00:53 · 20 answers · asked by J K 2 in Family & Relationships Singles & Dating

20 answers

I think you shoud tell me again that you want him stuff out and stick to it! Don't give in just because he's nice for a few days. If he won't get his stuff out you need to find out the laws reguarding this situatin for your state. If it's not legal put his stuff out, change the locks and move on with your love life. Don't cut your son's father out of his life though!

2007-08-20 07:13:41 · answer #1 · answered by tylremily 4 · 0 0

read up on common law marriages and land lord tennat laws. you can easily google them for your state and it will give you a clearer picture of what to do.
Your most likely route is the go to your local magistrate and file a notice of eviction and it will be served by an officer of the court (cop) and he will have to remove it and himself from the premises. If he doesnt you will probably be able to claim his stuff as yours after 30 days because it will be considered abandoned and you can sell it or donate it then. If he has a problem leaving after that you can pursue the issue in court and come out ahead with back rent and the like and he will still have to be gone.

I think your problem may arise if its a common law marriage situation seeing as he probably had that as his place of residence for x amount of years and you were in a relationship. At that point it will be a little harder but if you research the issue before hand you will do better than he will and have the law on your side.

2007-08-20 14:08:46 · answer #2 · answered by whatthehellallthesenamesareused 1 · 0 1

Give him a written notice that he has a certain amount of time to come and get his belongings. Then change your locks so that he does not have access to the home anymore. I would make sure that on the designated day that he is to get his stuff that you and a friend are there so that you at least have a witness that you were there to allow him to get his things. If he does not come, then pack up his stuff and set it out front.

2007-08-20 14:07:55 · answer #3 · answered by bluemysti 5 · 0 0

It's legally your stuff now. You've given him every opportunity to collect it and he has legally abandoned it.

However if you want additional evidence if it ever comes to going to court. Write him a letter saying you're giving him a month to get it after which you'll get rid of it. After that month you can legally keep it burn it or anything else.

Change the locks as others has suggested and be prepared to call the police when or if he becomes violent. Check with your local police how you get a restraining order in your area.

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Contrary to what someone else wrote you DO NOT have to evict him in any way. He is not renting from you and I doubt there is any lease agreement or money changing hands.

Also contrary to what someone else wrote about common law marriage the two people HAVE TO have presented themselves as being married for a minimum number of years.. In fact the legal wording is "the couple in question must hold themselves out to the world to be husband and wife." Common law marriage DOES NOT just happen after living together for some period of time.


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2007-08-20 14:05:47 · answer #4 · answered by elurle 6 · 1 1

Change the locks on the house, put his stuff outside, and get a security system so that he cannot break in. Tell him if he comes again unwelcome that you are going to call the cops. Does the house have both of your names on the deed? Just change the locks, and keep your windows locked.

2007-08-20 14:05:39 · answer #5 · answered by ManCandi 3 · 0 0

okay will first off change the locks and put his things in a bag and put them on the curb . get yourself a big mean nasty dog and one that knows you and your son are the only ones that need to be there . also call the police if he wont leave . also have another man at your house when he comes around and make sure he is a big guy even if you have to borrow somebody and just make sure he does not know them . good luck dear .

2007-08-20 14:09:24 · answer #6 · answered by Kate T. 7 · 0 0

Move his stuff out of your house. Tell him you are doing so, and do it on the day you tell him you will. Stuff it in a garage or storage or if you don't feel nice, give it away. No means no. You need to take charge of your life here.

2007-08-20 14:06:38 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

If you allow this man to leave his stuff in your house and keeps returning like everything is alright. Than you are a fool the next time he leaves put his belongings out with him this way he doesnt have to return for anything. Best of luck

2007-08-20 14:07:59 · answer #8 · answered by mmurray001 5 · 0 0

Are you still with him? (I ask because if he cheated on me, he'd be out the door!)

How much stuff does he have? If you want him out of your house and out of your life, change the locks on your place so he can't get in. Harsh, yes, but if he's not taking the hint and you're being obvious, this might be necessary. Take all of his stuff and put it outside so he can retrieve it (it is illegal to hold his items, despite the fact that he "lives" with you), change the locks, and tell him to get out.

2007-08-20 14:06:07 · answer #9 · answered by xK 7 · 0 0

My friend says that you should box his stuff up and put it on the lawn. But if you don't have boxes hey less work right? Or if you're short on cash GARAGE SALE! I mean you gave him fair warning. It's his fault. Kick him out and move on. Change the locks, make sure you do that before the garage sale.

2007-08-20 14:08:13 · answer #10 · answered by Chelsea 5 · 0 0

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