My fiance and I are planning a wedding. We are definitely going on a cruise for our honeymoon. But, we are on a very tight budget for the ceremony and reception. We have a one year old son, and it is hard to spend so much on everything.
Is it ok to just have everyone come to the wedding ceremony, and that's all? We also thought about having just immediate family and wedding party going to a nice restaurant afterwards. But, we couldn't afford all 70 or so people to go. Is that wrong to do? Or should I just invite as many people as we can afford to go out with us afterwards?
Any advise would be great!
Thanks.
2007-08-20 05:47:59 · 29 answers · asked by Miss_Mandy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
If you are going to invite people to your wedding, you need to do something afterwards. It doesn't need to be big or fancy; you just need to spend a bit of time with your guests and offer them some refreshment. It can be Costco cake and homemade punch in the church hall, a picnic in the park...anything. It's not even a question of feeding them (though it would be rather rude not to offer any refreshment at all) but of letting your guests feel they are a part of the day and that their presence is meaningful to you.
If you ask them to get dressed up, come to the church, and bring you gifts (and even if you say you don't want any, most people feel terribly awkward about not giving one), then you must at least allow them the chance to congratulate you and wish you well.
So it's up to you whether you provide cake and punch for seventy, a restaurant dinner for five, or an informal picnic for twenty-seven. Just give whoever you do invite a chance to share the moment with you.
2007-08-20 06:17:17 · answer #1 · answered by gileswench 5 · 6⤊ 1⤋
I see nothing wrong with that. Just have a simple ceremony and be done with it. You could have a nice little open house immediately following the ceremony. Just serve a little bit of cake maybe some hors'douvers. You and your hubby mingle with the guests no need to have a bunch of bridesmaids or anything. I think that would be ok and then you could save money. No need to do anything elaborate.
If anyone has a problem with that, then they can pay the bill for a huge party.
Edit**
After having been married, and having a nice reception- I would say that you should go on a nice Honeymoon now while you have the money. You may never get another chance, especially once the kids come.
The next time I get married, I would rather have a real simple open house and a Nice honeymoon. My family knows that too.
Really in the big picture- it is the vows that matter. That is what it is all about.
2007-08-20 06:41:36 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Look, a wedding is one day of your life and congratulations, by the way. Dont listen to people who say you are being selfish wanting the cruise...and who says you will get the chance of taking a vacation again in the near future? I never go on vacations, who can afford that with kids and a mortgage and bills....all of the things that come with marriage.
So have your small wedding. Invite only those near and dear to you, keep it to people who love you and understand your situation.
Have the ceremony then either have a cake and punch do afterwards....you can do this in a park or hall near the church or whereever it is you are getting married. That way your guests have a chance to wish you well, have some kind of refreshements and then you are on your way!
Or elope and get married on the druise, and send everyone a wedding postcard. most cruises have wedding chapels.
Or when inviting your guests, tell them you will be going out for dinner at such and such a restaurant and that they are welcome to join you for a meal there after the ceremony, in lieu of gifts, they pay their own meal.
If they love you they will understand and be there.
If they dont like the idea they go home after the ceremony.
Go for your cruise and enjoy every minute of it. You will build up many more beautiful memories than one wedding reception does.
Good luck!
2007-08-20 10:52:14 · answer #3 · answered by bluegirl6 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally think it's a little rude. What about actually getting married on the cruise? Most cruise lines do weddings and I have a friend who did this last year. If you want to have a wedding before the cruise, I would say just have a very small wedding so you can afford to have a reception for everyone at the ceremony.
A friend of mine got married last week. Her ceremony was held in her neighbour's yard and the reception was held in her parents' yard. It was a stand-up, hors d'hourves reception - *very* inexpensive. She didn't have to pay for a place to host the wedding, caterers, tables, chairs, etc. If you can find a house/yard to host the wedding, have someone make the cake and food, etc, you can do a wedding for a very low price.
2007-08-20 07:19:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, it is not ok to have a wedding and then just have people leave, with no opportunity to congratulate you or celebrate with you.
A reception does not have to be fancy...but it is important to have some sort of social function after your wedding. There is no reason why you can't have an extremely simple and affordable reception at your church, or even at someones home...just do a Cake and Punch Reception.
If you are looking at about 70 guests, you can purchase a very pretty wedding cake (probably just a two tier, for a small party like that) through your local grocery store (if they have a bakery department) or your favorite bake shop, get some cookies, mints, nuts and lots of punch and iced tea. Then your guests can mingle, eat cake, snack on nuts and drink punch (maybe a champagne toast, if you can splurge on it) and share your wedding celebration with you.
On your invitations you will put "Cake and Punch Reception to follow" or "Light dessert reception" depending on what type of food you choose.
2007-08-20 06:24:33 · answer #5 · answered by Kat 5 · 4⤊ 0⤋
why not have a cake/punch wedding reception.
buy a small wedding cake and have sheet cake to complete the cake for the guests. It'll be cheaper for you and the guests will still receive a snack. Perhaps nuts/mints too. Have the wedding around 2:00 and no one should expect a "meal". Place on the invitations, punch/cake following ceremony.
Get married in your church (if you are a member, you do not have to pay for our church use). Use a dress from off the rack. Ask friends/family members if they can make flowers for the bouquet. See if another friend can make your cake. I just made my friend's cake for a gift.
It is all possible. For 50 people, you could do a reception for less than $300 if you only do punch/cake/nuts/mints.
2007-08-20 06:16:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 1⤋
It's okay to have some type of reception, and just save money while doing it. Odds are, you'll be getting gifts from the people attending, so you'll get money back. . . You don't need to do dinner, just have some people as a get together, and cut the cake, have some drinks maybe (you don't have to have an open bar). . .Even just a get together at someone's home or something. There are lots of ways to save money, but to skip it all together, will be a little off.
2007-08-20 07:05:30 · answer #7 · answered by ShouldBeWorking 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only invite the people going out afterwards to the wedding, and after the wedding, send out announcements to those you did not invite-they will be happy to see the two of you married.
We only had 14 people in attendance at our destination wedding, and I would never think of marrying and not hosting a dinner for those in attendance.
2007-08-20 07:39:54 · answer #8 · answered by Learning is fun! 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you could put on the invite Reception to follow at a later date. Then for your wedding dinner you can invite the guest that have really gone out of their way to help with the wedding or to be there for your special day to a brunch or potluck meal at the home of someone close to where the ceremony will be.
2007-08-20 06:49:16 · answer #9 · answered by Mona 3 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You need some sort of reception, even if it just cake and punch in a room at the church. There is nothing wrong with a tight budget....there is always something wrong with short changing your guests like that. Guests are spending time out of their day to see your ceremony, travel, and everything else. They deserve at least small snack and a thank you for coming!
If you need to delete something delete the cruise and take a honeymoon later when you can afford it....or you will need to have a private courthouse ceremony and only invite a select few people if thats all you can afford.
2007-08-20 05:52:54 · answer #10 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 11⤊ 3⤋