Hi
Well, I and my boyfriend had this fight last night and I want to discuss it with you.
We are in a 6-month relationship. We done pretty well up to now, but last night my boyfriend told me that he does not want to bond with me too much, and he does not want me to think we will end up together. Which I assumed it as saying: " I'm tired of you let's break up!"
He was the one who brought the subject of getting married up, and I was the wan who asked him not to rush things. Now that he has a better job, better condition and a promotion thanks to my help, he wants me to "let him end this relationship whenever he wants."
Or as he said: "we should be free to leave this and the other one should respect the decision."
I think I want to breakup with him and I think what he said is a humiliation, But he thinks that he is right. No for his information if you were in my place would you stay with such a guy?
2007-08-20 04:53:38 · 11 answers · asked by Nuwanda 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Nope.
He wants no strings attached, able to walk away from the relationship whenever he wants? Heck with that. Walk away first, respect yourself!
2007-08-20 04:58:02 · answer #1 · answered by Jarien 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You mentioned that he is in a better job, condition, and promotion than before, so he probably considers you beneath him at this point. He has his eye on bigger game. Upwardly mobile people tend to want to be with their equals or higher up than themselves, not lower. I don't know what your position is within your career or financial status but I'm inclined to think he considers it below his own.
Have you heard of hypergamy? It's when people want to marry "up", even if they're already in a relationship. No matter how they feel about you, they always have their eyes open for bigger fish to fry. Even if you feel secure, and there aren't any problems, he'll be out the door as soon as he sees a better opportunity.
When people get promoted they often get big heads. They tend to overvalue themselves in other aspects of their lives than work and believe they are too good for their current situations. But it doesn't usually last. Promotions are more of an ego-boost than a tangible benefit in many cases. There's more responsibility but that doesn't necessarily mean he'll be more attractive to more successful women. It could be a difference of a few dollars an hour, which comes out to virtually nothing after standard deductions are taken out. Plus, people tend to spend more if they think they're making more, so there goes the extra cash.
I vote for leave the jerk and start fresh.
2014-03-02 04:34:02 · answer #2 · answered by Linda G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well gee he sounds like a lovely guy, after six months he tells you how unimportant you are to him basically? Why bother to put yourself through that, walk away before you get even more emotionally involved and eventually hurt by this guy.
I would sit him down and have a conversation about how you agree that you should be free to leave whenever you want and you are going to exercise that freedom right now.
Oh and from personal experience when a guy suddenly changes his mind on his relationship status its a good sign he might be seeing someone else, i want to be free could mean that he is already acting like it.
2007-08-20 05:05:40 · answer #3 · answered by kitty_witty18 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I wouldn't stay with him. Sounds like he is not being very respectful of you, and like he is trying to soften the blow of an impending break-up.
Leave him now, and move on to someone who appreciates you.
2007-08-20 04:58:49 · answer #4 · answered by BK 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't stay with him. Life is too short to waste on someone who isn't willing to give as much as he takes.
2007-08-20 05:00:22 · answer #5 · answered by Jen0408 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd dump him like the last garbage and instead help myself get that promotion.
2007-08-20 04:59:57 · answer #6 · answered by mingoril 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He has his eye on something else but he just doesn't have it yet. Eventually you won't have to stay. You will be kicked out.
2007-08-20 05:02:26 · answer #7 · answered by darmonx 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All you'd see is my backside going out the door!
2007-08-20 05:00:18 · answer #8 · answered by luckford2004 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uh oh
2016-02-15 02:10:26 · answer #9 · answered by carly 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lovey, you're wasting your time. Get out while you can now.
2007-08-20 05:00:55 · answer #10 · answered by Leona 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋