How do people afford to have a relationship (boyfriend/girlfriend) as adults?

Question

In Massachusetts, life can be expensive. We're both over forty. Between the both of us, we make decent money, but we both pay market rent separately and with expenses, there is no money left for entertainment.

I'm asking other MA resident adult couples. How do you afford to have a relationship without feeling poor?

Living together is out of the question. Our relationship is new.

Answer 1

Hi,

I know exactely what you mean! I am 38, my boyfriend 48.
We both own houses - me in Medfield, my boyfriend in Newton. We both have good jobs, but after all the bills (mortgage, utilities, real estate taxes etc) there is not much left. Like yours our relationship is new and we don't even talk about possibly moving in together yet (I also have to children).
I can't really offer much advice, but just wanted to let you know that you are not alone!
We go on a lot of camping trips in NH or Maine, go mountain biking and canoeing which are free or inexpensive activities.
Hope that helps!

Answer 2

Mature people learn to spent time together in ways that are not costly. If you can enjoy taking a walk in a park together of the sake of talking and being with each other your relationship will be stronger than if you only want to go to clubs or movies together.
Trade off making Friday eve. dinner (something simple) for each other and watch a Movie at one of your apartments as an evening entertainment. I bet you could even borrow a DVD from a friend or co-worker.
Pick up some old board games from a yard sale and spend time together laughing playing operation or trivia pursuit. Take a book out of the library and read to each other.
Go window shopping and play a game of if I had a Million Dollars and a big house to furnish what would I buy. You will learn a lot about each other and there tastes that way.
Sign up together to do volunteer work together - such as helping at a booth for a community festive or helping at a church run second hand store. When you laugh together at how you would look in the ugly costume jewelry that you are sorting you are building memories.

Answer 3

You have the comfort of both your homes to entertain............I would say you both were lucky. Alot of people think you HAVE to have money in order make a relationship work but basically all you need is the person you are involved with. Make your dates at home; watch movies, play games, make snacks, have dinner, take a drive together, walk in the park, take your lunch outdoors and have a picnic. Don't spend money to be happy with eachother just have fun and enjoy eachother's company and if the time comes when you both have some extra money, you can do something special but for now don't strain your relationship or your pockets, be simple cause if you try to do too much without money pretty soon when the money runs out you both will be frustrated in the relationship cause you have already begun depending on going out and such.

Answer 4

Because Love is not just about Money and Payments. You will never feel "poor" in a Real and True Relationship because you will do eachother's part to make your partner comfortable. Love is never Expensive because it is PRICELESS.

Answer 5

Trust me this is not an issue just for older people...I think that the best thing is just going to places which do not require a lot of money. Example: go to the park and have a pick-nick. Good Luck!

Answer 6

Go for walks, go for bike rides, cook each other supper at home, do other cost-free things.

There's no need to break the bank just because you're dating....

Answer 7

Hold off until you're more financially settled?

Love/romance is a luxury; survival is mandatory.

Perhaps go hiking or things like that, that don't cost money?

Answer 8

Stay in bed and have sex, play video games, and eat.