hi, im 27, still single, last time ive had a girlfriend was 10years back, i unfortunatley became an IT tech, which was a grave mistake, lots of money but no social life in that field. all my friends and peers from school are all maried/have partners and kids&i have nothin at all. i fell so ashamed as i no longer have any1 to go out with, and i hate being the 3rd wheel&hate it when they cuddle up&i have no1 :( .I do have new friends, but they all immature brats who do stupid and silly things. y am i destined to be alone. i dont feel well, these guys are all havin a blast in life&im still stuck here waiting find sum1 and get my life started. where did it go wrong? how could my friends leave me like this?
2007-08-20 00:56:43 · 19 answers · asked by vanilla_thrilla01 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
buzz will help in socialising
2007-08-20 03:46:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
Do not dwell on the past and it is not about your friends leaving you. This just kept moving, which is normal.
If you have some other type of interest, see if you connect with someone through a club or organization. Join a health club, go to the YMCA or even go to church. You need to find ways to network outside of work. The main thing is to not let this get you down, because you do not have to stay in this rut. But you will have to get yourself out of it.
One possibility is to tell your friends and their wives/partners that you really would like to meet some new people of the opposite sex. Maybe you can all meet at a restaurant. It has defined end, so if you do not like the person that well, you will be in and out in an hour and a half.
2007-08-20 08:04:34 · answer #2 · answered by Wolfithius 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some careers a not relationship friendly-There was a song-forgot who sang it-Working In The Coal Mine-so this is not new. For me it was to try finding a single guy while working in the preschool age child care field. Your married friends have a 50% or better chance of getting divorced so you may have to just wait it out. Or you could try internet dating as one person suggested. Find a good girl in Church? A bad girl nearly everywhere else. Your happiness is your responsibility-not your friends so take what ever actions you need to.
2007-08-20 08:11:26 · answer #3 · answered by PrivacyNowPlease! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My cousin (who's 26 years old) is in IT, too, and is also single. Most of her college friends have gotten married and have even gotten a couple of kids. She says that it's the same for people in the IT/corporate field; people in that area are mostly career-driven. I'm only 17, so you don't have to listen to me (there's a big chance I don't know what I'm talking about haha), but I don't think your friends left you intentionally. It's merely a case of having different interests and different social circles, one might say. And if you're not happy with the people you work with, why don't you try working somewhere else? Or if the money's too good, try going out to meet new people more often. :)
2007-08-20 08:07:41 · answer #4 · answered by YayForMe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To answer your last question first, it's normal for friends to move on. That happens to everyone.
You have to stop being so self-deprecating and start to use the skills you have to find someone.
OK you don't like to go out alone, so do your search online. It's not shameful. Lots of people have the same problem. Work is taking over everybody's lives, not just tech-heads.
You can be completely anonymous, so there's no risk. Isn't it worth the effort?
2007-08-20 08:04:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should focus more on your life rather than comparing it to your friends. Your friends might be wishing that they had your life and were single and stuff. I'm sure there are positive aspects in your life, but if you keep on focusing on the bad aspects, that's all that's going to keep happening.
Your actions determine your results. You need to change your habits and your way of thinking and push forward. Focus on having the life you dream of and don't worry how you'll get there just imagine you already being there and then it will happen. You should probably read "You were born rich" because that's where i'm getting all this from.
2007-08-20 08:03:58 · answer #6 · answered by K8tgry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"im still stuck here waiting find sum1 and get my life started" your waiting... for what? you have to put yourself out there... get some self worth and MAKE TIME to put yourself out there, join some groups and make friends... although i should practice what i preach... i moved and havent made too many friends here, i know its hard...
make a goal and take a day at a time to reach it... make time and go do things that make you feel good, stay healthy... dont get so down on yourself... when you have that self worth, you will understand that nothing can stand in your way... good luck
2007-08-20 08:02:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
stop whining and do something about it..... u sound like a sore loser.. why arent u happy for them.. what kind of friend are u.... are they to blame for u not having the time to have a social life.. they were right there ..where were u.. u are on the path to self destruction pal...
change the way u live.. get a different job... spend more time with them.. get a girl {}
2007-08-20 08:02:03 · answer #8 · answered by who ?? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, i used to feel the sameway. listen, you're still young, and i can safely bet that you being an it tech doesn't take up all your time. try to date a bit, maybe pick up women in bars or try one of those dating services on the web, maybe get a pen pal in your area... if you feel sorry for yourself this is not gonna work itself out, so go out and try stuff.
2007-08-20 08:02:02 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never see my old friends either. People get married, have kids and that's it - be happy you are still single... look on the bright side! You can do whatever you want. You'll meet someone if you don't stress about it.
2007-08-20 08:03:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find yourself a nice 18 year old, "immature brat" and ask her out. Then all you old friends will be writing to ask where they went wrong.
2007-08-20 08:30:11 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋