how du know if you've made the wrong desicion???

Question

i recently parted with my long term girlfriend, now i'm thinking did i do th right thing. were spending time apart now. but how do i know if i've made th right desicion and not just made th biggest **** up in history?? please no stupid or immature answers

Answer 1

I read your previous queswtions or at least scanned....I got the impression that the relationship if it is this girl you talk of was stormy to say the least. Pulling you to her and pushing you away....head messing. Have been there.....it becomes in us a form of obsessional love we know they are bad for us but we still want them. The best advice is don't go there again and be aware in future relationships form the outset and read the signals before the hurt can be so deep. The people like your girlfriend (ex) and the man I speak of is they cannot change they are damaged. Love is not a rational in their lives and has to be equated with control. With time lapse you are probably remembering the highs......not the lows. Focus on the negatives...remember all and then you know life is now a pleace to move forward in and not look back. You owe this to your sanity.

Answer 2

OK there was a reason why you parted, you obviously weren't suited, there is a saying 'they are an ex for a reason'.

The reason you feel how you feel is because there is now a massive gap in you life where you ex used to be, what you've got to realise is that she isn't the only person that can fill that gap.

Move forward not backwards, get out with your mates and meet new people and you will find someone when you least expect it.

I was dumped by the heartless ***** that i was with and it crushed me, i'm now coming out the other end and when i was out at the weekend i was served a burger by the most beautiful blonde girl in the pub and we spent alot of time smiling at each other, so i'll be going back there next weekend for a burger!!! My point is that few months ago i was suicidal thinking that my life was over and no other girl would ever like me but it was bull ****!!!

Onwards and upwards my friend !!!

Oh if you find it really hard read 'the four agreements' by Don Miguel Ruiz. it'll change your way of thinking and your perception of things for the better, it a book of wizdom, it changed my life. (not religeous)

Answer 3

Well, honestly, I don't think anyone here can answer that for you. Only you can be the judge of that. Ask yourself, and be honest with yourself when you do so, why you broke up with her. Did you have good reasons? Were you being selfish? Were you no good together? Was she good to you? Bad? Were you being honest with her?

These may not even be the right questions. This is the kind of thing that only you really know the right questions to ask, much less answer. And you are going to have to do some serious soul searching to figure it out.

I realize that I probably haven't been much help, but relationships are rarely simple. I don't know you, your girl friend, or the situation, so I'm shooting blind. The best I can do point you in what I think is the right direction and bid you good luck on your soul search...

Answer 4

It never feels good after a break up... that's why it's called a 'break' up... Usually, you'll know if you've made the right decision by how others react, in this case, ur ex. Was she really sad... cuz if she was, you made the wrong decision... Some break ups can be sad, but a nicely done break up won't really make either side sad, cuz both of u will enjoy being friends :D

Answer 5

If you are having doubts already, then possibly you have not made the right decision. However, there are reasons why you broke up with your girlfriend and do they outweigh the reasins why you want to get back with her.
Write a list of reasons why you broke up with her and another list of reasons why you want to be with her and compare them. Then you can see what is going on in your confused mind and perhaps make sense of what to do. Sometimes you only realise what you have lost when it is too late. If you do get back with her, it seems you will both need to make some changes to make this work to ensure you are not going round in circles.

Answer 6

Are you sure that you are just missing her, or is it that you are unsure because you were so accustomed to being with her for so long? Sometimes it is just the fact that we became adjusted to things being a certain way. Then when they are no longer that way, we miss that feeling.

The other scenario is that you thought that things would have turned out better after the split, then found out that what you had was better than what you thought you would get.

Answer 7

Well, it's not something other people can help you with, it's how you feel... but normally, if you have to think back, and if you think you might have made the wrong decision, you probably did.

Also, ask the girl how she feels about it. Maybe how she feels will change you how you feel.

Answer 8

all decisions are life experiences, everyone wonders if they have made a right choice, sometimes people regret making wrong decisions, some people dont, but mostly people learn to cope with their decisions good or bad.
i have often wondered what if about past gf's, its normal to feel this way, but dont rush back into a relationship, you made a choice for a reason, stick to it.

Answer 9

if you are meant for each other whatever happens in the very end you'll be together..

letting go of someone close to your heart, will surely break you heart but what if ..that decision you've made will teach you and your partner the art of letting go..

Answer 10

you wont know for a while mate, you will do all the normal missing the company etc but in the end you will know. i think you probaly made the right one going my the fact you just said you think you made the right one!