Should there be a license for parenting?

Answer 1

I read through the responses posted before I began writing my response and I must say I am very surprised at how negative other's are regarding this issue. I see some do understand the importance of teaching those in our community how to be effective, loving parents who are capable of providing a healthy enviroment for their children to grow in.

However, those who are in favor of such a rule understand too how difficult it would be to establish and enforce. The question isn't "do we need to more throughly educate our parents", but rather, "how would we impliment such education and ensure it was available free for all"?

I am surprised at the vehemence of many responders. Why would this notion create such angst among Yahoo! Answers members? I wonder what motivates some to take hypothetical questions so personally. I would far rather engage in a healthy, open, friendly debate than scream, rant and rave!

We most definantly have a high degree of need to educate parents on how to "be" parents. We have so many dysfunctional families raising dysfunctional children. For a person to state that this allows for population control is cruel. To advocate for children to be so harmed during childhood that they grow up to be murderer's is just sad. The affect of being raised by parents who are brutal, who use corporal punishment as the single form of dicipline is to raise children into carbon copies of themselves, repeating the vicious cycle of brutality and dysfunction.

Society suffers when we have such a high degree of dysfunction in our families. Society is progressive. This means we always search out what is best for society as a whole, and try to evolve into every growing civilizations. Brutality is not a way towards such a future.

There are many adult parents who look back on their parenting methods and the affect this has had on their grown children and wish they had done things differently. As people grow they learn and these ever higher levels of wisdom and experiance cause us to change and evolve into better individuals. However, there as some actions we can never undo, never make better, and how we treat our children is one huge area. Even the best intentioned parents look back and wish they had known what they do today so they could have done a better, more effective, and healthier job raising their children. Even the best intentioned parent knows they are going to get things wrong and hope to change the cycles of their own childhoods, but often lack the skills and tools needed to do so.

We go into parenthood with only our own experiances to guide us. We get our experiance from how we were raised, what our own parents did while raising us. This often leaves us blind, deaf, and dumb in reaching for different tool, tactics and ineffectual attempts at different methods than those we know from our childhoods.

Young folks often say, "I won't do what my parents did with my children". We hear this a lot from the young who are facing their first child, or even in preperation for children. However, as well intended and intensely vehement they are, they most often fall back on the teaching they received while growing up. It is much easier to do what you know than to change to what you have little idea or knowledge about. We reach out for new parenting methods because we know how it felt growing up and usually how damaging and ineffectual, but what do we reach for? Where to we find the information we need to make informed decisions on child rearing?

What we usually do is start reading self help books on child rearing. Sadly, there are a zillion ideas on what is best and a zillions aurthors on the subject. Which one(s) do we take to heart? Which of all the conflicting ideals and questionable wisdom out there do we take seriously and imploy in our own child rearing endevours? Who do we believe, who is right, where do we turn, while attempting to do what is best for our children and not repeat the mistakes our parents made with us?

This is the million dollar question and this is where child rearing education comes in. This is the main question and need, but how would we impliment the one we deem right and correct once discovered? How do we ensure that everyone receives the same resources in education, build the same skill set and use the same tools? Each society has to understand the myriad spiritual and religious belief systems contained in a highly diverse society?

This might be much less complicated in a society which is not diverse, such as China, Japan, etc. However, as migration becomes more wide spread the single ethnicity and spirituality of a country is rapidly becoming inflitrated by different races. Japan may control foreign purchase of property, but Japen still allows those from other countries to move and live several generations within their borders. Even the least diverse country is rapidly assimulating others.

When we have such high degree of diversity teaching parenting becomes extremely difficult. Personal beliefs hold a huge sway over personal parenting concepts. For example: Buddhist's believe in a model of several personality entities which must be encouraged and honored by those in contact with children. This means that each individual child must be dealt with at an extremely individual manner. What would be appropriate for one child would not be for another. This creates a need for a different parenting model for each child within the family.

Another example is children with handicapps, or birth defects, etc. These types of children need individualized parenting models as well. There isn't a single model which fits all children. A child with ADHD looks like a "normal" child on the outside. Yet such a child's brain is highly different than that of a "normal" child. These children process thoughts differently, view the world a bit skewed, lack the cocept of time insofar as being able to use the past to apply to current behavior or view the future. They live in the moment, not because they choose to do so, but because this is how their brains are wired. They have attention difficulties and lack an ability to learn from past mistakes. They are highly intelligent, but lack the ability to apply that intelligence in "normal" manners. The channels of needs such children have are out of the realm of general child rearing courses. We lack any concret courses across the board which can direct and build skills in these children's parents.

Communities in the United States and in other developed countries are attempting to provide parenting courses for families. However, it is not a pre-requisite of having children. Usually, parents who have had CPS-Child Protection Services, involvement within their home structure are required to take such courses. They are forced to do so, it is not usually volluntary, and as such parents go through the motions, rather than truly partake as willing spirits. Anytime something is forced positive outcomes are reduced. Parents go through the courses in order to comply with CPS or court order rather than willingly apply for such resources.

Due to the many varied factors in a diverse community, a single model for dilivering parenting material is doomed. The fact that a diverse community requires diverse parenting assistance a government is not going to be affective in creating a viable modality.

So, while it would indeed be a huge asset to society and the communities within society to provide education for effective and healthy child rearing skills and methods, it is in fact not a venture which would suceed. It is simply too complex to provide all the different models diverse communities would require.

Basically, all we can do is what we are currently doing. We currently offer parenting courses in many communities. These courses are rather stilted, not open to individuality, nor do they take into account each families unique needs. We currently have volluntary admissions, usually free of charge, and we have forced compliance through Child Services and the Court System. Familes are "referred" due to concerns raised in child custody battles and in cases brought to the attention of CPS, or whatever the Child Services department is called in a given locality.

Also, these courses are still not widely available. There are many smaller towns and cities where resources are scarce. Many cities and states face cutting needed social services and usually the first to go are those addressing the needs of familes, the young and the elderly. This is sad but true.

All we can do is continue with what we are currently struggling to provide our people. We can continue to fight for tax dollars to provide such needed human resource services and apply them more liberally. We can contact our representitives: Federal, State and Local and petition for more responsible use of our tax money and to provide an adequent finacial presence for the core of society, which is humans. Without humans we have no society. How healthy these humans are determines the health of the society. Therefore we have ample reasons to provide needed resources and benifits to ensure such health and well being.

So, yes, in a perfect world we should require a "license" for adults to be allowed to become parents. A method of ensuring that each adult going into parenting has a solid tool kit of skills to provide a healthy loving enviorment in which children can bloom and grow.

However, we do not live in a perfect world and as we are currently there simply is not any real means to accomplish this goal. We can only continue on our slow journey of evolution and civilization.

A huge part of true civilization is a lack of need for Government involvement in the daily lives of the population. As we evolve we will be able to change our focus from daily survival and forced compliance to a willingness to participate in healthy behaviors in our societies.

People scream about government involvement yet fail to understand it is our own behaviors which create this very presense. Until we can all willingly follow agreed upon societal rules we will contue to need forced compliance. Those who are already able to conduct themselves at this level of civilized behavior understand that there are still those of us who refuse to do so and put all of us who do at risk.

This is an issue which really needed discussion and debate. I often hear people say, "We need a license to opperate a motor vehicle, or to fish, but we don't need one to have children and the responsibility of raising children is so much more important, we need to require parenting licenses too!".

However, it simply is too complicated to do so. Even if we were capable of creating such a program and it met all the varied needs of such diverse communites I doubt members would wish to comply. There isn't much more angst than somebody telling another how to raise children! Nobody likes a buttinsky regardless of how well meaning or the huge benifits the end result would provide society. A statesman/woman would kill his/her career by attempting to create a government madated parent license, and currently I don't think we are evolved enough to do so without curruption and missuse or abuse.

Answer 2

Isn't there enough government interference in our lives, already? What entity, exactly, would have the wisdom and the authority to issue these licenses? What would the penalty be for having a child without a license? What would happen to the children born to people devoid of a license? See what happens when you start to try to regulate human nature? There are just some things you can not legislate. Our government, unfortunately, has tried to legislate way too much.

Answer 3

I have often thought about this. I think it would be an excellent idea. We could at least cut down on all the men and women who have children with no thought on actually putting the time and effort into raising them to be good people.

Answer 4

Yes, and No it's just I don't trust the government to dictate how we should parent. However, the common sense stuff, involving serious child abuse, drugs and so on could be a start.

Answer 5

No, It would cost an extraordinary of money to run a department for child licenses, not even to mention civil liberties.

Answer 6

That is like making people get licenses to live!! No there should not be licenses for parenting.There should be licenses for foster parents,and stricter rules on them too!! Stop abuse in foster homes!!!!

Answer 7

um yeah....you have to have a license to drive right...ppl dont want stupid, immature, irresponsible ppl to be on the roads...so why allow them to reproduce and spawn more stupidity into the world....

Answer 8

i think that they need a owners manual more then the license

Answer 9

NO, why should we have to have a license to be a parent???

So families can donate even more money too the government to sit on there ****s and do nothing???

Sorry but I say a BIG FFAATT NO!

Answer 10

maybe not a license, but at the least a certificate of training.

Answer 11

I have often thought the same thing. Some people don't deserve to have children...