My dating life is stuck in a rut. I'm scared that I'll end up alone. Please help?

Question

A little about me: I'm a guy with a good education and a decent job lined up after business school. But for some reason, I'm terribly self-conscious all the time (maybe because I have a stutter in my speech and also worry about how I'm coming across to people) and this is affecting my interactions with people and especially with girls. I'm 30 yrs old, but still freeze up some times when I meet a really pretty girl that I might have a crush on. But other times, I'm just fine. It often happens that I'm fine talking to a girl the first few times, which gets her interested, but later, I just start second guessing myself and wonder if she'll like me, and mess up my conversations on future dates. I also find it hard to be entertaining and interesting throughout a date -- there are times I get quiet and there are awkward pauses. Is the guy always supposed to be entertaining? I mean, isn't the girl also supposed to join in and help the guy out if there's an awkward silence? How do I improve?

Answer 1

Relax. God has someone in mind for you, and you'll know when the right person comes along. If you want help with your stuttering, go to www.stutteringhelp.org and check the estore for "Self Therapy for the Stutterer" as it helped several uncles who used to stutter. Some public libraries shelve the book, also.

Answer 2

It would appear that you are a little self-conscious about yourself and I mean all around You also appear to have an entitlement complex.You seem to believe that because of your education and prospects, you are entitled to the dream girl you described in your piece vis-a vis other people.Then you suggest that because of a slight speech stutter, you are self-conscious and insinuate it may be responsible for your lack of success.My tips to you are that you should:1) stop focusing on your education and future position to get you the girl;while they are definite assets, they are not everything as you have already found out2)do some introspection and soul searching and define your values3)understand that women are not commodities that a bigger paycheck must get you unless the women are mercenary4)every man is looking for the same type of girl you described but you seem to think you deserve her for some reason(implied entitlement intended)5)be a little bit more humble and stop looking at others through your nose. I hope you see everything I wrote as constructive criticism designed to help with the situation you find your -self in.I wish you the best.

Answer 3

Be careful. Don't let a fear of being alone get you married to the wrong one. I know a guy who is in his 50s and just got married within the past year. He thought he had found "the love of his life" and had thought he would be left alone until he found her. Turns out that she had been recently divorced from a husband of 30 years and had tried to get the house and a pile of money including his retirement. Now, she has filed for divorce from my friend and wants his house (she didn't get the first husband's house) and money.

Let God send you the woman you are to spend the rest of your life with. When you find her, keep your money separate and don't put her name on the deed to your house so you don't end up in a similar situation. My friend would have been happier being alone the rest of his life instead of getting into this mess. He had plenty of family and friends and didn't need a woman to make this mess.

Answer 4

Man stop over analyzing things when you are on a date. Just say what you want and stop worrying what shell' think. Her reactions will determine if shes the type you wants. Just be natural, if you fake it and she fall in love with you them the real you will come out later on and she might not like it. When dating to some one its better to have her do the talking. Ask questions but not proving type questions.

Answer 5

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