After 4 months of having a cyber relationship with a woman in the NE, we decided to meet in person. So, I'll be flying North to meet her. She agreed to meet about 3 hours from where she resides. I feel terrible about her having to drive but she says there is more to do in the city we'll meet at. She and I will be staying in the same hotel but different rooms. The question is: Will she be expecting me to pick up the hotel tab for her? What is the right thing to do? Should I offer to pay? Of course, I will incur the airfare, the meals, and transportation while we visit. I plant to visit with her for three days and three nights.
2007-08-19 17:21:47 · 23 answers · asked by ahe03 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
She lives in a small town and she often complaints that there is not much to do, let alone spend three days and three nights. So she says.
Based on my discussion with her, she comes from a good family and has a good paying job. Of course none of this has been confirmed. I guess my intuition and instinct will let me reveal what kind of person she is. At this point I'm willing to give her the benefit of the doubt. I am sure she feels the same way.
2007-08-19 17:42:54 · update #1
No way! She's also in the relationship. She chooses to meet you, too. You two pay for your own hotel rooms. Pay for a meal or two. At this point, it should be 50/50 until you decide to get a little more serious. don't feel bad about the driving, you are flying. fair share. Don't pay for ALL the meals and ALL transportation. Share expenses. It's fair.
2007-08-19 17:27:55 · answer #1 · answered by Mir3lla 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should call and discuss it before hand. Simply say that you think there are varying ways of doing this and that it might be best to split the bill this first time. so that no one feels obligated afterward should things not work out. You will learn a lot about her in this discussion. Be open about it. You still will be spending more even if you split the hotel and meals.
2007-08-20 00:28:53 · answer #2 · answered by barthebear 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If she made the reservations, she should at least pay for her own room. You are flying out knowing you are staying in a hotel, so you should expect to pay for your own lodging. Be prepared to pick up both tabs if necessary but I would expect this first visit to be 'Dutch Treat' all the way around.
2007-08-20 00:34:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to buy your own plane ticket, and you can eat on the plane or wait until you and she meet up at the air port. You will be paying for the motel, most likely, especially if you booked it. That's what she'll be expecting. But the two of you could split the food bills, if she's willing. And most of all, use caution. you don't want to find out she's done this, with other men prior to you, that she's married and using an ailias, or even that she's not how old you think she is. Nor for that matter, do you want to find out, she's not who or what, you think.
2007-08-20 00:30:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think she should pay for her own transportation and hotel expenses. Other things like food, movies, etc. should be shared, maybe you can pay the first couple of times and then share the expense. You don"t really know each other well, I' wondering if she's keeping something from you by not letting you see her in her environment.
2007-08-20 00:29:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd think each has to pay for his/her own transportation and the hotel room. I'd be concerned if she expected you to pay and that made a difference in wether she is going to like you or not....
During the time both of you are out on date, ie. restaurants, movie, etc, you might offer to pay, but I think, you are not obligated to pay for the entire cost of her whole stay.
2007-08-20 00:31:34 · answer #6 · answered by tkquestion 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
im sorry to say this but u are a d.amn fool, if you are meeting someone for the first time and thinkin of pickin up the check. you should be hopin she didnt use some elses picture to fool you. u only pay for the tab when u are on an "official" date and plan on goin to either 1-4 base.
2007-08-20 00:27:32 · answer #7 · answered by William S 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!
She pays her way and you pay yours. She will not respect you for picking up the tab. Sure it proves your love for her.....on a first date? Give me a break! Maybe in a few months of face to face..
You need to know up front if she is broke or a gold digger. If she asks you to pay or expects it, you'll know in a hurry.
Keep in mind the saying, "A fool and his money are soon parted".
2007-08-20 00:35:14 · answer #8 · answered by Bugged Out 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would see how it goes. She isn't a complete stranger because you've had this cyber relationship going on but if you don't hit it off in person and you end up not really liking each other than you shouldn't have to pay for your bill and hers. If you do hit it off the right thing for you to do is to at least offer to pay for her room. If she has any class she will decline your offer and realize that you've spent enough time and money already.
2007-08-20 00:28:22 · answer #9 · answered by deppfreak6963 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
She pays for her transportation and hotel. You pay for yours. The other expenses can be split, or you can pay. I'm sure that she expects to pay her own way. I know that I would.
2007-08-20 00:25:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋