Am I better with a white woman?

Question

I'm a black man. I love my people. I love my culture. But I've been through so much unnecessary bullsh^t with black women...
I've been through minor difficulties with white women but as of lately, white women seem to be much easier to get along with.
I promised myself a long time ago that I would love all women equally.
I'm a good looking man. Getting a woman for me is limited to my interest pretty much. Some women will jump to meet me, some will pass me by.
I've been around the world and still have more to see. At this point I'm trying to line myself up into the road to happiness.
It just doesn't seem like I'll find it with a black woman and that makes me sad.
Even my father suggested I'd do better with white women and white friends.
I'm originally I'm from a real rough neighborhood and some would still see me in some ways as ghetto or gangsta like.
In reality I'm stuck in between ghetto and upper-class. Guess I need some direction.
What do you suggest????

In addition... I'm not associating black with ghetto and white with upper class.
I'm originally from the South Bronx. When I say ghetto I mean ghetto like shooting guns off the roof of your project building because you're bored. Ghetto like being a kid and Mom and Dad aren't there so you make a peanut butter sandwich because there's no jelly and you're hungry. Make sugar water because there's nothing else to drink and there's no kool aid.
Being ghetto has nothing to do with being black because the origins of the word itself is Jewish and was made in reference to Jews.
I'm a merchant seaman. My career allows me to see most countries. I make a lot of money doing what I do. Thats why I'm upper-class. There's no need for me to do crime anymore.
I'm changing. Educated and well off black women look at me as handsome but I most talk this way and dress that way.
It's like I'm too ghetto for a well -to-do black woman and too good for the rest. I'm f^cking stuck and I hate it.

Answer 1

well I think you are sterotyping because I've seen some "ghetto" white people I think it just depends on the person some people tell me I act "white" but what is that...cause I act like i have good sense and proper english... i think its just the women you've been with everyone of every race is not the same

Answer 2

well to be quite honest i just think that the right person, no matter what race hasnt come along yet.i wonder, how open minded are you? ive been reading up on chinese astrology. to my astonishment the similaritys in the ways all people are compatable are so dead on. this is the birth year which ive noticed that i see alot more of in people. it also has to do with the month too and how you were raised but i believe that this astrology hits to the core of what influences a person to be. i dont share this info. lightly. i have been really studying people and the ways they act, talk, move whatever and it usually hits dead on. what i would need from you is your birth year and month. then i could tell you which years and months too watch for. seriously. the divorce rate is so high i think everyone should look into this stuff. email me at [e-mail]. i really want to help. i plan to be a councelor in a few years because i have learned so much, not the astrology but my whole life revolves around people with issues. this is what got me so interested in this. i needed to know why there are certain persons, that get along better than others. i have the book,"the new chinese astrology" by suzanne white. you may just want to go get the book. i would also look into a book of months and days. because even though the months arent as strong as the year, some times it can make the difference.

Answer 3

wow, those are some harsh words coming from a black man. Just becuase you have had bad experiences with SOME black women doesn't mean all black women are the same. That's like saying all black men are low lifes but we both know that's not true. Have you ever heard the saying the way you act the friends you have are the people you will attract. I don't think you father meant any harm when he said you will be better off with a white woman but I do know that no one can leave your life for you but you. I think you need to find yourself as a whole to figure out what you really want. Maybe since you were raised in a urban environment and your use to that kind of environment in some way you seem feel like you belong there.

But good luck in finding what your looking for

Answer 4

You say some would still see you as ghetto or gangsta like, then you are probably attracting ghetto or gangsta like women who are going to give you drama. I'm pretty sure you have enough perception to tell if someone has a decent character. Is she talking with no class? How does she carry herself? Can she carry on a decent conversation? You are going to be looking for the same things in a white woman, so why can't you look for those things in a black woman?

Answer 5

If you feel that a white woman is what you want then you should go for it. I mean, if all you get is heartache with black women then give white women a try, and see what happens. But, please don't rush into anything take things slow, and let fate happen as it's supposed to. Hang in there the right woman is out there for you, just give it some time. And remember be patient. Patience is a virtue. Don't forget that alright. I used to think like you then I met my wonderful husband, and now I'm happier than I've ever been in my life. This happened this way for me because I let my husband find me and fate brought him and I together, and now we have a beautiful 2 year old son togrther. Get out there and meet someone don't be scared, and don't second guess yourself either. If you know what you want then it'll be provided to you when the time is right.

Answer 6

I grew up in a rough neighbourhood the experience has made me the person I am now. I dont care where a person lives, how much money they have.

You want happiness. Its all in your mind. Marry a positive person with the same outlooks as you.

White, Black, Asian, Hispanic, Indian....no women is better than the rest or easier to get along with...It is all a matter of mindset.

Every girl is different and there are many positive, successful, put together black women out there. My best friend has all these qualities and coincidentally ponders on the same issue as yourself.

I suggest you keep true to yourself and surround yourself around positive people who wish you well. Race is not a concern.

Answer 7

Go with your heart, not with other people's opinions. But also be prepared for some people not to accept your decisions. If you are stuck between two worlds, try keeping a 'pros and con's' list of both the ghetto and the upper-class lifestyles. Your answer should pop out at you where you really want to belong. Take the time to make an informed decision--you know the old saying, but 'the grass is (not always) greener..."

Answer 8

Ghetto is never the way to go. If you can completely eliminate the "ghetto" from your life and be upper-class, things will be much better for you.

I don't know what kind of black women you go for, but maybe try an educated, classy one instead(If you haven't already). If that still doesn't work for you then find a classy(non-ghetto) white woman.

Answer 9

I'm going to say whatever floats our boat! If a white woman makes you happy then I agree for you to take that route but I am an African American woman and i feel that if you want to stay in your culture than you are going to have to look around and outway your options because there are Black women out here that want what you want but you have to go beyond the first thing that stands out in the crowd for everything and sometimes. I think you need to find someone that can pull you out of that GHETTO mentality because i think those are the type of women you are associating yourself with and thats why you not feeling BLACK women

Answer 10

Sir, I truly understand where you are coming from, I have come from similar upbringings, but my parents were both at home, but they may as well not been because they argued so much that it was like they were never there. But as far as the women, man it does not really matter what you get now a days, you can be educated all you want. You can travel the world all you want. You can have it all and it still wont matter at the end of the day because you are going to have to figure it out for youself. Life is about choices, and you have to choose for position. Not for anything else. As long as they are team oriented, they can do other things that you need them to be, but marry for position. Do not settle.

Answer 11

I really don't think you need direction as much as you need education not to be rude but you are ignorant, by associating "ghetto" with African Americans and "upper-class" with white people you are putting down the culture you love so much. Your negative experiences with African American women aren't because of the color of their skin, which is on the outside, but the person they choose to be regardless of their race. Saying that you are going to limit your self to only white women is not a guarantee to success because your limiting those you can love and who can love you. Maybe the females you have come in contact with gave you a negative or positive impression whether black or white but how do you associate that with race? Maybe you just haven't met the rite black women to show you a positive relationship and whe rite white women to show you a negative relationship. how will you ever know what it feels like to be in a good relationship with a black women if you refuse to see them?