Should I stay with my therapist? She's not helping me anymore, but my mom wants me to keep seeing her.?

Question

My therapist used to help me with my problems, but in the past month she has not been helpful. My therapist also says that she is ineffective in helping me. She says that she feels "helpless" to do anything for me as my therapist. She even wants me to see other professionals who would give her guidance on helping me. But my mom wants me to keep seeing this therapist because she will "go crazy" if we look for another therapist. I have seen a number of therapists before. My mom gets stressed at the idea of seeing a new therapist. She thinks that we will be "going around in a circle", seeing a new therapist every few months. I feel that if I stay with this therapist it will be a waste of time. What should I do- stay with this therapist to make my mom happy, or look for a new one who might be able to help me more?

Answer 1

Your mom is being more considerate of your therapist's feelings than helping you find a solution to your problems. Stand up for yourself and look for a new therapist who can help you. I know you love your mom but you will be better off to her and yourself if you can find an effective therapist.

Answer 2

I think that u shouldnt waste time and money on a therapist that does not help you. Why does your mother think that you need a therapist very badly. I think you need to talk to your mother and say exactly just how you feel and if she doesnt agree with you , and you are under the age of 18, then maybe you should listen to her. If i was you, however, and my therapist said i am okey, i wouldnt go. Unless my mom was gonna kick me out of the house then i would do whatever she says. Mom knows best.

Answer 3

I think that it's time to move onto another therapist. The average person who sees a therapist usually goes through 3 before they are satisfied with the results. If you are feeling that you are not getting any better and your therapist is telling you to move on, then you should. Good luck.

Answer 4

I know just how you feel. I'm 17 and have depression and anxiety to. Your life seems really hard and I emathize with you. You are so young, though, you have your whole life ahead of you, and the truth is it could end up being really wonderful. Don't give up yet, you might end up happy , things usualy get better with time. If you really want to die than you need to talk to someone and get help. Tell your parents, or a school counsolor. Remember; suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Once you kill yourself you can never take it back no matter how much you regret it. You may end up happy, so please don't assume what your life will be like in the future. Please get the help you deserve. Give life a chance before you give up on it.

Answer 5

Therapy is good but only if you are totally open and honest with your counselor. You did not say how old you are?
I had a secret that my grandfather molested me and my sister when I was 6 or 7, He molested me first and than my sister. I kept it inside until I was thirty, I made a lot of very bad choices, I wish I had been honest enough with myself to tell the truth, but it was very hard because I loved my grandfather and did not want to hurt my family!!
I am now 50 and a very determined and honest person. I wish I had let the the pain out sooner it really changed my life when I finally did.. I was 30, before I found a therapist that could help me. I thought the pain was worth keeping to myself and it nearly destroyed me.
My past is something I would like to write about and share with other people. I started a book, the title is, "Written From MY HEART" about the pain and lose of love for myself because of that secret!!
I first was molested at 7, than at 12 or 13 I was in a car with guys from school 2 of them tried to rape me and the other stayed in the car and was my age and offered no help! I was in counseling at different ages and did not understand that I needed to share such a secret. It had influenced my life in so many destructive ways.
I married my high school sweetheart and divorced after 11 months, I thought he could take care of me. But I never told him my secret. I remarried and had 2 girls with my second husband, we stayed together until I started college and got counseling and gained some confidence and respect for myself then we divorced after 11 years!
I remarried after I let the secret out and have been happily married for 15 years!
I went to YSU for 7 years to become a nursing home administrator, that same year 2 months before I got my degree. I thought I had a mini stroke, my left side went numb. It turned out to be MS.
So as you can tell, I have struggled a long time with various issues and concerns! I am NOT a licensed therapist only someone with a kind heart and would love to help you, if I can or recommend a therapist who has finally put me together, she is excellent at what she does!
If you would like to know more about this subject and how to overcome your pain, I am willing and able to share my story and try and help you and your mom understand what your pain is and be there as a friend for you when you have a question or concern that you are not comfortable telling or asking you mom!
I am a grandmother of 2 boys(ages 7 & 4) and mother of 2 girls, I have seen many things change and would just like to help if I can?
Write back and tell me and I will gladly give you my phone number or we can talk thru this service.
Up to you just willing to help you understand your pain and be a friend!
My name is Deborah Borton, I live in Youngstown, Ohio

Answer 6

It sounds as if you are a very resistant client. Yes look for another therapist if thats what you feel will help you, hopefully you will be more willing to take a part in your own recovery if you chose the therapist. Remember therapy only helps those who want help and are willing to do the steps needed to change.

Answer 7

The therapy is about YOU. It's about you getting the appropriate help for you. This means connecting with the right professional who can do that. If not you will only be wasting your time and money. Mom needs to understand this very important fact. It is critical to your progress. Sometimes finding the right therapist can cost you some effort but it is well worth it when you begin to see the results. Good luck with your mom.

Answer 8

I'm a psychotherapist and sometimes it is best for a client to seek out a new therapist.

To find a therapist who can connect with you better and provide better counseling:

Your therapist may be able to refer another therapist to you (and your mother).

Ask your friends if they know of any good counselors that has helped anyone in their family.

You might also contact your local Juvie center and ask them which counselors they contract with. These counselors are usually in private practice and contract with Juvie; these counselors connect well with young people which is why Juvie renews their contracts. (I contract with our local Juvie-even though most of the teens I counsel are not on probation)

Most of the teens I work with cannot count how many counselors they have seen through the years.

I recommend you keep trying therapist until you find the one that clicks for you.

Answer 9

If your therapist is truly saying that, then you should definitely get a new one. It's not a one stop shop. Sometimes you have to look around before you find one that you "click" with. Personally, I have found it easier to talk to therapists that are closer in age to me.

Answer 10

If your therapist is willing to refer you to someone who she thinks would be better at helping you then i say go fo it.

Ive had bad experiences with therapists who could not help me and I wouldnt advise anyone to stay with someone who is not helping them.

P.S. it sounds like your mum might need to see someone about how to get you whats best for you and not just for her.