My bf of 17 months has finally edmitted to me that he's been talking to his ex girl friend...He said he missed talking to her...He said she understand him, & they can joke about anything...He says he loves her, but only as a friend they've both agreed to that...He said they will ALWAYS be friends...He says he loves me with all of his heart....& sometimes I just don't understand him? & I guess I don't laugh enough? I feel like I'm not good enough. I feel like if he had the chance he would be with her & not me. I feel like I'm being used just for sex & nothing else.I don't think he truly even loves me.or if he ever has.He made her seem better, as if he was comparing us together. I asked him why he loves me, he said becuase your a great gf?? Bull aye? I dunno, I love him..& it's killing me with in that he did this to me,& behind my back for awhile.Everyday just lieing to me. He said he was always going to try to keep it from me, he even made a new account online so I wouldnt find out.
2007-08-19 04:56:31 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I know I should leave him, but apart of me doesn't want that to happen, it wants to make it work..but after he said all of that, saying he loves her ALOT knowing he does...I don't think I can go on like that...I feel like crap right now, & I'm in serious need of some edvice....PLEASE help me..What do I do? & why?
2007-08-19 04:57:19 · update #1
They never had sex he says, everyone says they had a long distance relationship & were basically just friends.....He told me last night that that was all they were but he loves her? I think he talks to her more, & I think he loves & cares for her more...I feel like I'm no longer good enough for him...but apart of me is wanting to talk to him, tell him exactly how I feel & that I want to make it work...but then another part is just like...Don't even worry bout him girl, he's a lieing fool who loves he's ex? & talks to her about life....You can have better...then I think, maybe there isn't better maybe every guy out there is a liar....every one in my life is....I don't know what to do...
2007-08-19 04:57:50 · update #2
This boy is making you feel uncomfortable and unhappy. That is the bottom line. Say he meant what he said, let's say he loves you with all his heart and he simply loves her with his heart but only as a friend-why would someone who loves you with all their heart make you so unhappy? He is not doing his job. You make the rules on your happiness and if he is satisfied making you unsatisfied(even if he "loves you") no matter what the truth is, what is true is that you are unhappy and he is not tending to you. Who is getting what they want from the relationship? His ex and him. You deserve what you want and you don't deserve to be played. Get out of this relationship STAT. Why is he keeping secrets? You deserve better. You deserve someone who caters to YOU not his ex! Respect yourself and leave someone who can't respect your comfort levels and your needs.
2007-08-19 05:21:46 · answer #1 · answered by Jane 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Before you ask what to do .. You should ask yourself how much you love your bf? I f you love him enough you should know how to trust him...but if you don't trust him because your 100 percent sure that he's a liar then why suffer long enough? If you think that he's cheating on you and can't trust any words he says, then why continue loving him?
Aren't you just jealous about the ex? Maybe you just misunderstood what he says...and think that he's comparing you to his ex and is better than you etc.. because that's what you want to think?If not , then end up your relationship....Don't make the situation more harder for you.....Feel the pain once on the time you'll break up with him ..rather that feeling the pain longer while his with her ex and having you as his gf....Smile:)
2007-08-19 12:33:29 · answer #2 · answered by joey_br0s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awww girl i completely feel for you. My current boyfriend always tells me how much i mean to him but i can never help thinking im not good enough or thinking he would rather be with his numerous and much better looking ex girlfriends! but at the same time i don't feel like i can leave him because i know it would be hell and i can't help loving him. I totally know how you feel.
At the same time though, i think you should trust him. For a while my boyfriend thought i had a thing for another guy who is really good friends with us both. In reality I had no feelings for this guy... but i did love him dearly as a friend. He always makes me laugh and gives great advice... but that doesn't mean i have the hots for him! I also have another guy friend who remains very close with one of his exes. They are great friends and always talk and hang out and love each other a lot... but he has NO desire to date her at all. So these are both examples of how it is possible to just be close friends with someone without feelings. Give him a chance... but if he starts disapearing and being shady then maybe its time to let go!
2007-08-19 12:10:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
By the simple fact that he kept it a secret this should tell you that you should be worried, this might be painful for you to hear but perhaps you should dump him and find someone who is willing to let his past relationships in the past and not right up front in his current gf's face.
2007-08-19 12:10:32 · answer #4 · answered by Greg 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ya know, My best friend is my ex- I dated him for 7 years! From age 15- 22. He is married and has a son, and still calls me everyday, we still hang out....Some people can actually have a friendship like that...although it is rare!
you are young and havent experienced that yet...but I assure you, things are not always what they seem, perhaps he is only friends with her now....
Dont over analyze it, and keep your eyes open...things will be fine!!
2007-08-19 12:06:01 · answer #5 · answered by ameribicgirl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It seems to me that she really is just a friend and you're a fatalist.
2007-08-19 12:07:02 · answer #6 · answered by Penelope Smith 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋