best age to have a brother or sister?

Question

My little boy is now 7 months and my husband and myself have been discussing what age would be best to have a little brother or sister for him. It took 2 ful years to conceive Joseph and we're resigned to the fact he may be our only gift from God. We could start trying for another now and have when he's young enough to accept a new baby or we could wait til he's 4 or 5 and old enough to understand and not feel displaced. What do others think?

Answer 1

i dont think you should decide on when to have another just so it fits around your first child. any age he is when you have another will be accepted as long as you try to balance the affection and attention between the two. i always thought my little girl would feel pushed out but when my son came along 3 years later she thought it was fantastic. The other qestion you need to ask yourself is can you and hubby cope with two being so young? Please dont put your son first on this one as he will adapt very easily to being the "big brother". it took me three years to concieve with my daughter i was having tests and alsorts but then jake made a quick appearance when we least expected it. having two tiny ones is hard work, tirering but very worth it, but its easier if you wanted to give the new baby the full attention to wait for your little boy to start school. Consider your work commitments also when your weighing it up, and how your relationshipo might be under the added pressure. I hope this helps xx

Answer 2

Well it is a bit in the lap of the gods, especially as it took a while to get your first child, but i would try for a baby now, a brother or sister for Joseph and I think that sometimes when they are a little older and a new baby comes along there can be a degree of jealousy as the new child gets all the attention. One sooner than later will mean that Joseph probably won't be old enough to know the difference. Beside which this way you have all the clothes and equipment presumably so the expenditure is also lessened. I'm not saying that's a prime consideration but something to think about too.

Answer 3

hi well my sister has got 2 kids my nephew is just 2 and my niece is just 1 and although she has said it has been tough they are the closest of friends now and play really well together, so i would say that having one soon would be good but on the other hand my friend has a 7 yr old and has not long had a baby and although the elder of the 2 was a little quiet and withdrawn about it she has come up trumps she helps her mother with the baby and is a very proud big sister so i don't really think it matters what age u have another one there will always be hard times but also many many good times!!!!!!!! so good luck and hope u and yr football team he he have fun in the future.

Answer 4

theres no ideal age theres advantages and disadvantages to any age. i had mine close together and one of my daughters is doing the same, however my eldest has an 11 month old and doesnt plan to have another one for 5 years. its what suits u whether u want to get the nappies, feeding pushchairs out the way in one go or whether u want to space them out so as u get one off to school ur just starting with a new baby and can give it more attention. if u feel that it may take a long time to conceive another then maybe u should leave it to chance and see what happens. however if u do that u will probably find that u get pregnant immediately. whatever u decide good luck.

Answer 5

do you what you feel most comfortable with. if you think you could cope with two very young children then go for it, life is short. if not then wait a bit longer until you feel more confident about it, then talk about it again. im the eldest of 4, there is 3 years between me and my sister, 4 years between her and my other sister and 19 months between her and my brother. i personally think the 19 month gap was best. 3 years i hate. i am planning on having no more than 2 year age gaps between my own children, depending if i can cope or not anyway. just do what you feel more comfortable with. either way your son will adapt to the change just fine. if you have one now he will grow up only ever knowing about a brother or sister, you wouldnt have to worry about the competitiveness from him being used to being an only child so long, whereas its more likely if he was older. theres lot of advatanges and disadvantages, do what you thinks best. your son will never feel displaced, he will be happy to be a big brother. good luck.

Answer 6

Hi,

There is no right or wrong answer to this - every couple feels differently!

I know most ladies like to wait until the oldest is about 4 because they then tend to start nursery and have been toilet trained and they find it a little easier than having 2 children under the age of 2 ect.

It up to you - if you want Joesph to have a brother and sister now then that fine!

I am one of 4 children. My elder sister is 7 years older, followed by my other sister who is 5 years older, then my brother who is two years younger!

It up to you!

Good luck!

Lx

Answer 7

I have 4 kids 3 boys ages 6 1/2 4 and nearly 2 I also have a girl who is 3 months. I dont think there is a right age we never planned any of ours they all get on fine they have their moments but who doesnt. I never wanted a big age gap between any of mine. there is 19 months between the youngest 2 and he is very gentle and loving towards her. Personnaly i would start trying now.
Good Luck

Answer 8

i personally think 3 years is probably the best age gap as the older child will be out of nappies (hopefully) and starting to attend nursery so you will have the little extra time to devote to a new born baby, i had a 10 year age gap between my first and second child which was awfull, you dont even want to know the problems i had between them... but i had three years between my middle child and youngest which was brilliant... they play togther great and share a room, and when my youngest was a tiny baby my middle child was at nursery and it was such a blessing to have that bit of free time to devote to baby without the other one feeling left out.... i would deffo recommend 3 years gap to anyone.. any less than that can be hard work with two kids in nappies etc also any more than that can cause alot of conflick between the children etc.

best wishes to you and ur family.... x x x

Answer 9

You should have a second baby whenever you feel ready for it.You'll have the chance to explain everything about the new one in the family to your son when time comes.I would personally suggest that you should wait till Joseph becomes 2 yrs old.

Good luck and I hope that God will help you again :)

Answer 10

i think of as much as approximately age 10 continues to be o.k. to share a room. i don't believe 6 or 7 365 days olds choose for privateness. yet from age 10 puberty can start up and that's around the time they could sense extra self concious and choose for privateness. Or in case you have not the different strategies, sharing a room previous this age is super in the event that they're taught to comprehend each and each others privateness. they are in a position to pass and gown in the bathing room and so on...