How do you feel towards people who label or nickname themselves as Ex-.....?

Question

ex-christians

ex-muslims

ex-atheists (tho Ive never seen this one before but you never know :P)

I feel that people who label themselves like this are people who are overly negative (they use negative sentences to even label themselves)

And when I see a positive sentence like: christian lover (it doesnt bother me at all because I know theyre generally positive people)

What do you think?

Answer 1

Well, as somebody who has "labeled" herself from time to time an ex-Christian, I disagree with you. (I write Muslim, ex-Christian as background info.) How do you know their intention when they do that?

I do it when I want the other person to know I may know more about Christianity than the average Muslim as I actually practiced it when I was one. And usually, even off the net, when I tell somebody that I WAS a christian and we start talking about it they tend to take me more seriously than many 'native Muslims' I know who have no way to communicate ideas or understand what the other person is trying to say. (N.B. I know many native Muslims that DO know a lot about Christianity but I know just as many if not more that don't know the finer details that can be debated.)

edit:Being an ex-Christian to me is a positive. Because now I am Muslim AND it means I also know a lot about Christianity and can appreciate certain aspects of it. And ex does not mean negative anyway.

Answer 2

I sometimes use the term ex christian here as I want people to understand that I do know what christianity is about. Its not a label by any means. About the only time I use it is in answering questions that imply that if I really knew what christianity was about I would be one. Perhaps former christian has a less negative connotation. If someone asks me my religion I do not say "I am an ex christian" but "I am an atheist".

Answer 3

I myself have used the term ex-something within my answers. I use it to explain a previous relationship and defining my knowledge of a specific kind.

I am an ex-wife, so I have knowledge of a marriage that went bad. I can speak to questions pertaining to marriage, divorce, etc.

I am an ex-JW, so I have knowledge of a religious sect and can speak to those questions that seek information on becoming a JW, the JW doctrines and practices, leaving the JW sect, etc.

ex-anything does not within itself denote being overly negative. It simply lets those reading answers or questions know where I am coming from in my answers.

Within my answers that use the ex-something expression, I also label myself as currently married or currently a Christian. So within your logic here, have I counteracted the overly negative with overly positive labeling?

Just my thoughts.

Answer 4

I've been reading everybody's answers and I don't mean to be pedantic but I have a feeling you aren't a native English speaker nor are some of the people that agreed with you. EX in English is not always a NEGATIVE it means FORMER. Would you prefer for somebody to say former Christian (of course Christians will say these people were never Christian) or former Muslim (of course Muslims will say these people were never truly Muslim and never really practiced Islam which is rather stupid because even in the time of the Prophet pbuh there were people who rejected Islam and there were hypocrites as well.

Maybe you were never an ex-anything but you would know that if you grew up one way and left it that it makes a huge impact on your life. HUGE - it is a part of who you are, you aren't living in the past It doesn't mean you are insecure. Maybe it even means you are more secure to be putting yourself out there. There is more room to criticize somebody when they actually admit to caring about their soul enough to do research and pick a religion different from one's family and friends.

And about what Lawrence & red dragon said...I can only agree if that person was now an atheist and had no religion (keeping in mind that atheism itself can be seen as a religion). Otherwise, it is silly to not be able to say or to be seen as somebody that is insecure or tied to the past. live on day in the life of somebody who is living as a minority in their beliefs --the beliefs that they chose for themselves later in life and then tell me otherwise.

Oh and to the fool up there that said you think their spouse influenced them, it is true that it happens sometimes but I know TONS OF WOMEN for example that HAVE CONVERTED TO ISLAM OF THEIR OWN FREE WILL! What do you expect them to do after that? Marry a non-Muslim?

I find this question & many of the answers isnsulting

Answer 5

I find it interesting you use the example of positive people as "christian lover" rather than pagan lover, hindu lover, muslim lover, etc...

I think people who use the term "ex" are mere trying to explain their position to a something and that is an easy way of letting a person know where they are coming from. I find no negativity in it.

Answer 6

It helps you know where they've been and that they changed.

Lots of info in a few letters.

I think "christian lover" is way more bothersome. Sappy treacle. People who go around proclaiming they are "Christian" are usually the most negative and judgemental from my experience (both on-line and IRL).

the prefix "ex-" is not a negative thing. Judging people for what they call themselves is more negative.
Being a bigot, prejudiced against groups of people because of the letters "ex" is very negative. Judgemental, and contrary to the teachings of Jesus.

How many splinters are in your eye?

Answer 7

It's to give you background information. Are you going to just believe what somebody says without knowing what their background is?


I think somebody that brings something like this up is INSECURE and VERY JUDGEMENTAL.

Sure maybe it is better to say "I grew up a baptist...." but isn't it so much eaiser to say ex-Baptist?

And who says if you are and EX anything that it means you have no faith? Who says that it is keeping you in the past. THE PAST is part of who you are, good or bad!

Answer 8

It provides a point of reference sometimes, one of the functions of language. It also indicates that the person has an ideological history which has shaped their thinking in some way. I personally reject a lot of my past beliefs, but that doesn't mean I want to erase them. They have shaped me.

But yeah, NLP is cool, isn't it?

Answer 9

I think it is a way for people to let you know where they are coming from. Also, Josh McDowell is an ex-atheist, he calls himself Christian now.

Answer 10

Well, I think the point is that they wish to show that they are "enlightened" in some way by being an "ex" something.

And they are trying to get approval from others as to that. As if they now know something more then they did before. And they are trying to seek out others who feel the same way.

It is human nature is seek out sameness, and that is a strong feeling when one has "been there, done that." No different then divorced people, now, condoning divorce after spending much of their life condemning it. No one wants to be alone in the world and so "misery loves company."